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Re: I'm Hungry...
Mumbo Jumbo! =D So. Umm. I have this strange little piece, yes? For Cal's contest. I tried writing it in a style I've never really experimented with before, and I ...
May 27, 2009 -
Re: An Absence of Rose
[Already Gone—Kelly Clarkson: 022. Exodus] The sky is an overenthusiastic shade of Pepto Bismol, as if Mother Nature thinks she can smother my woes with a large dose of bubblegum ...
May 27, 2009 -
Re: Writing from a young kid's PoV
I agree with Twit-- my 8-year-old cousin uses pretty mature phrases and thoughts, just she says 'I brung the music' and stuff like that. ;) They don't always know the ...
May 27, 2009 -
Re: Reptile *edited*
Hey Unster! ^^ I see Gal has attacked your poem, eh? :P Don't worry-- not everyone on YWS is quite so brutally honest. I'll just give you a quick run-through ...
May 26, 2009 -
Re: Embarkation
Hey Bubbles. ^^ I saw that this had no critiques, and I thought I'd throw in my two-cents. I really loved this. Your narrator's emotion was well-presented, because it wasn't ...
May 26, 2009 -
Re: Rosey's reviews
You said you were bored! ;) I already have some fantastic crits on this one, but I'd love one more opinion before the deadline. Arizona Princess Other Fiction I can't ...
May 26, 2009 -
Re: A Dark Elf's Tale
Hey Rosey! ^^ Thanks for the request. Let's see what we can do here. :arrow: First line? Meh. I really think you need something less of a narration there and ...
May 26, 2009 -
Re: Mother, May I?
[Footprints in the Sand-- Leona Lewis; 014. Logos] David had, against his better judgment, gone through the drive-through window to order his strawberry milkshake. There was something markedly menacin
May 25, 2009 -
Re: Can't log into the chat?
I'm sorry, everyone. Chat's malfunctions today are a sign directed at me-- I think the god of the internet realm is trying to tell me that my science exam tomorrow ...
May 22, 2009 -
Re: Southern Fire
Hey Galerius, here as requested. ^^ I see you already have some reviews on this, but I'll just throw in my two cents here as well. Alright, so. I think ...
May 22, 2009 -
Re: Arizona Princess
Edited. ^^ I added some more to their conversation, and I'd really appreciate opinions on whether or not the additions work? Thanks so much, everyone.
May 19, 2009 -
Re: Reflections on Pasiphae
Wow. Tigger, I am thoroughly astonished that this is your first piece posted on YWS. Really, what have you been waiting for?!? :P Okay, so I see that you already ...
May 19, 2009 -
Re: Little Smiles
My chior director complimented my voice. ^^ I'm more than halfway through the book I'm supposed to finish by my Literature exam on Friday, which means I'll be done by ...
May 18, 2009 -
Re: Wishing on a star
Hey Adna! ^^ I guess I've decided to go around critiquing all of Jon's crazy prompt contestants. I will say, I really enjoyed this poem. It made me think. I ...
May 17, 2009 -
Re: Blade of Grass
Hey Music. ^^ Evi here. jon's going a bit whacko with his prompts, don't you think? xD I do agree with Jon here that your main issue is rhythm. When ...
May 17, 2009
