Esmé

Spirit Caller Six-year-old Catalina, aboard the ship “Marchioness”, was watching the spectacle designed especially for her. Wide-eyed, two fingers picking at her lip, she laughed with glee as the

Ehhh, poetry *eyes wide* Not my field, sorry xD -elein

Hi and welcome to YWS, hope you have fun! If you have any questions, feel free to PM me. Lookig forward to reading your work, elein

Quote: Snapping his head around the Skull, with its crooked smile and worn head, shook at him. The last part is a tad bit unclear - the skull shook? Quote: ...

I think I'm going to post more of this, xD. To the amulet - it just means that she became someone (again, still have to figure out who). Anyways, thank ...

Quote: This night, however, This night, that particular nigh… Too much of night! You have beach repeated also, but that somehow doesn’t stand out as much. Quote: The man looked ...

Yes, I did say that I would critique it, didn’t I? Well, here I am! Quote: Chapter 1 Vranem West Make that bold. Put a space or two. I don’t ...

Yes, maybe the amulet is a bit cliche... But a ring would be even worse, wouldn't it, lol? I can't say anything that will make it less cliche other than ...

Her name was Ileana, and, for time being, it was enough for her. She was twelve, maybe thirteen years of age, standing amongst a cluster of girls similar to her, ...

The prologue kind-of-thing Quote: If you are to be my new medical officer. I expect you to have better sense than to waste my time.” Comma instead of the first ...

... And again I read through everything that gyrfalcon wrote... Too fast, too fast! -elein

LOL, omg, you are so right,,,

I don't think that this is supposed to be here. How about the Discussion and Tips forum? To the text... Uhm... I really have no comment... -elein

When you format this, I will write a critique, ok? (Spaces between paragraphs) -elein

You know that this is great, don't you? Absolutely awesome, in fact. Quote The weightless spell didn’t work on him; since his little growth spurt he had been immune to ...