Emerson

I totally and entirely agree with Green River! Last names are not needed. But, While planning my novel in October, I found it helpful for me to give my characters ...

From the Comments/Suggestions thread: Is it possible to put something like "Last 100 Posts" on the site, like there was on TSR? I mean, I love the "View Posts Since ...

I think I did all ten. I will actually have to go back and count though, because I don't remember... by this point, I'm sure its ten.

So in the next chapter you describe Yori? That is perfectly fine, but its kind of a "thing" about writing, you want to introduce your characters as quickly as possible, ...

(you and capitalism again :P) I'd rather be neutral. I don't like the heat, and being cold is too....bitter. - Diedrick Are you ready?

Realizing that I have failed at everything. - Diedrick Being alone, though I'm alone most of the time...- Adrian borders, or barns and nobles? (I'm asking the worst questions today...)

"Not for a while. When I enjoyed myself, or when I was happy? I don't think I've ever enjoyed myself, I've found too many things about me that I do ...

Claudette's already torn apart the plot *squeals* I got mentioned!!! This is something I think I never do....even with my own work. Which is probably because in my short stories ...

I think that it does, from a scientists stand point. But I have lost all hope in science and so must say that it does not. With no ears to ...

I liked it :-) I can't critique poetry at all, and I don't really have anything to pick apart either, because it was so darn good! ...how your left shoulder ...

teeeeo> THAT IS SO FUNNY! but over used...still, I laughed! In America you make posts; in soviet Russia posts make you! (also over used)

10/10 It's heartfelt

Though he might not know it, Adrian would be my best friend. -Diedrick If you could choose your own gender, what would you pick?

edit: I missed that you had posted a new version of Chapter 1, but I'll leave what I said anyways, perhaps it will still help. Next time, use the 'edit' ...

8/10 it looks neat, just disproportioned...