Ember

Thanks, Mattemus! I'll get on those corrections! :D Thanks for the review, and for all of your encouragement! -Ember

Thanks, XxxDo! I'll get on those corrections, and I await your arrival at Chapter III! ;)

I think this was an interesting piece- plot is definitely your strong point. I was like 'Oh my gosh!' when she actually got kidnapped like Peter and her father said. ...

I no what you think Its gonna be another boring poem About how somebody has unspoken able beauty Or just to short of a skirt But this is about your ...

III The town we arrived in was called Wakayama. It looked like a predominately Shinto town, because I could see a large Buddhist temple off in the distance. It had ...

Wow, Matthemus! I'm flattered! Thanks so much for your kind words- I'll get onto the third chapter right away! :D

Hey, Tusker93, The Good Things: I could definitely feel the pain of your MC as if it were my own. The agony of not being able to help someone else, ...

Thanks, mikepyro! I'll try to improve my skills in describing the fight scenes. And thanks for the compliment! :) -Ember

Wow, Mars! Thanks so much! I'll definitely get onto editing this! EDIT: Turns out that metronomes were invented in the early 1900's, and this takes place in 1853. Oops- thanks ...

II I decided that, after Ohagi put me to bed, I would kill my father. I weighed my choices. There was stabbing, but that was too much mess. There was ...

Doesn't this belong in Fantasy Fiction? Then again, it's going to be Action/Adventure so why not? :) Prologue: Not a fan. I don't think you even need the prologue there ...

I can't express my thanks enough, Mars- I'm so glad that you like my story! :) I'll get on those corrections right away, and I'll work diligently about improving my ...

I thought that the edited version was a lot better in the reaction that Darry had to Ralph's death. Instead of the generic 'Why?' he actually pounded his fist into ...

This was a really cool piece Aero- I really liked how you portrayed the relationship between the siblings perfectly. I have two little sisters, and honestly, that's exactly how I ...

I fixed those- I made my voice a little more active. Thanks so much for your help, Aero! And I'll edit the -kun thing, explaining honorifics in the beginning. :) ...