Demeter

I think the first three lines crash a little abrubtly. "What do you see when you close your eyes? (I like this one, somehow) A million tiny dots? What you ...

I don't really know, it just came into my mind. Maybe that was a little too rash thing to say. But don't worry, it didn't disturb me for the poem ...

I don't know why, but there was something very, very irresistible in this poem. It was different from phony, fake artistic poems and I loved it. Short, sweet and strange. ...

I like the first look and impression of it. The two "stills" in a row disturbed me a little ("Still the dew falls. Still, the lonely lily..."), though. "The undertow ...

I really like this and got emotional :) You don't tell too much, just enough. Oh my, this is so sad, I feel bad for her. Poor girl... Very good ...

I agree with Vernon in some parts, but I really liked the idea of this. It wasn't too short nor too long, either. :) I, too, will smile to him.

Well, Suzanne said it all, so there's not much for me to say anymore. It was a cute and simple kind of poem. But actually I have to say it ...

I agree with Tamara, you should make clear lines. leafs --> leaves will never happened --> will never happen And don't forget to review! Other than that, nice job. Let's ...

Hi and welcome to YWS! I agree with everyone here, your poem kind of takes us nowhere; it starts and ends in the same place, if you know what I ...

Sometimes it feels like everything goes wrong, nothing happens, no one listens. When they're not around just when you need them or want to show something. When your sentence is ...

For me, this was kind of confusing. But maybe it's just me - I haven't read very much poetry. I liked the triple rhyme game-fame-shame, why have you used it ...

I think some of the rhymes were kind of cheap, like night and light. A fire for life, to live for each day To reach out for your dreams, no ...

I don't think that straight reference to Harry Potter is really necessary. But other than that, I think you use words that are very suitable for this kind of poem. ...

You got it right, Elmear. :) I was hoping to read something even deeper and more contemplating (is that a word?), though. It's a good subject, you could write about ...

Oooh, sounds very interesting! Plus I love your avatar.