Chimchar

You will. Go to the advance critique board to read the rest. Please tell me how I can improve.

Sorry if it was so long, I dont expect people to read the whole thing. If you want to read more, just got to the advanced critique forum and download ...

Okay then. Fixed it. How was it confusing. Just tell me so I can fix it.

Err.. You say it's distubing. I don't think your poem is disturbing, unless you literally cut off your chest or something. But IMO this poem must protray love, rejection and ...

Why don't you try to make your story shorter. That way you will get more replies. Don't worry i made that same mistake before.