Celdover

Ask, and you shall receive. To be perfectly honest, I found this to be very dull and predictable. I see your standard teenager about to get into some trouble with ...

Hello there. Nice to meet you. I like the historical and artistic aspects of this piece and how you show how the characters feel about them. Passionate and protective, intrigued, ...

Hi there. I'd like to start with agreeing with Lavvi on your dialogue and verb tenses, the tenses first because they're more of a problem. It's not so much you're ...

Hello there! I certainly like the interesting setup you have here and how you're trying to establish a different culture. I can see you're trying to have a naming convention ...

Hello. This was a nice and calm read. I think you did a good job displaying Sarah and Chelsea's emotions in the moment and how they felt about the summer ...

I must say that I simply adore your narrator! Her random thoughts, musings of the world, and conversations with herself are really entertaining to read, and she has a personality ...

Hello there. I'd like to start off with how I think this piece has potential. I like how you portrayed the urgency of the situation by having the narrator focus ...

Hey there. Let me just say that the very first thing that jumped out at me was the fact that you needed to tell us how to pronounce the name ...

This is a very natural read and I really enjoyed how you set up things in the first paragraph. I also really liked the narrator's snappy comments that came up ...

First off, I would like to say that the narration feels very blah to me, and the description feels like it's grinding the story to a halt. We first see ...