Cade

Another annoying thing is when people explain work. I usually see this in poetry. Like, "Oh, I wrote this when I was 12 so it's not great" or "This is ...

The subject of your post made me laugh. Hurrah! Ooh, horror and romance. Interesting. I'm a poet, but hope to see some of your stuff around! Welcome! Colleen :wink:

The "thy" is still weird, though, because it's not in the last stanza. In terms of clarity...the title is the first step. While it's fascinating to have a cool title ...

They had cut out his eyes: [s]they knew not[/s] they didn't know how much those things leaked The liver part makes sense now; I'm not sure I didn't get that ...

Why the archaic language in the beginning but not anywhere else? What is "Hlafweard"? *is confused* So. This is about an apple. Right? It made me think of Snow White ...

You have gotten many elements of poetry right, my dear, but yes, this is a really good example of focused description of one unconventional object. *bows*

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~** What the heck is that? It's not part of the poem, I know, but it's ditzy. I'm sorry. It was really distracting. Anyway, on to the real poem: This ...

Ooh. Nice. I really like the idea here, and how you kept coming back to this idea of a garden. In the first stanza, when I read, "...when gardens suffocate," ...

How is the title confusing? It's a duck! That's what makes this poem cool. It's centered around a duck, with all these gorgeous descriptions...yay for unique poetry that's NOT about ...

^^What she said. Thank you, Sophie, for being articulate. Definitely try writing about something small and *seemingly* unimportant; that type of exercise can produce some unique results.

I second Sophie here, but it may be the entire premise of the poem that's the problem. Addressing bullies is rather...childish and doesn't really make for enjoyable poetry. Here you ...

Granted, but now you make him or her very very angry and this person comes after you with a torch and pitchfork, and it's not a pretty picture. I wish ...

Haha, it gets like that around where I live, too. I think the second one is the best, because it has just one central point, the tree. It also has ...

Yay! Bye-bye second stanza. Now it's kind of short and sweet. Short and sour, rather. Nice. I'm really pleased there was a snowday today. I didn't have to go to ...

Rule -7: Allowances are a privilege, not a right. The Reason: You have a responsibility to do chores if you live in the house. The Truth: Adults like to keep ...