Cade

It's eight o'clock and frozen waffles spin around the microwave. The girl I will be paid to watch while Mommy's out has in her hands a flashlight. When the lightning ...

Oh, yeah, she's on the covers of magazines, featured on the news, etc. Yeah, I was six when she died, and it may be one of the earliest news stories ...

Ah, pity you're not a poet. I pretty much live in the poetry forums. I like photography, though...are you into film or digital? They just ripped out the darkroom at ...

Totally agree....*edits* Thanks a bunch!!! Edit: this way, the emphasis is on "a man," rather than the fact that he's dead--what I was shooting for in the first place. :P ...

As always, I share Clau's view here. I would say that if the title and last line of your poem are the lyrics of a Shania Twain song, you've gone ...

Eeew, I'm sure everyone appreciates that description, ShadowTwit. Anyway, Clau...it's so good that you're okay, and I'm glad the car took the beating for you. No one here would want ...

I be returning to crit your edit. I must say, this is much improved. Normally I would advise against lengthening a poem, but I think this version is better than ...

I do think "a man" would be cool. So you're going for something like this? Here lies a man who loved One woman, deeper than his fear. A man who ...

impression of Ed's contest was that you were supposed to write a poem that Snape would write...but you could argue that he would write his own epitaph in a burst ...

I agree with Rieda and Clau, too. There are just a few things I want to add... Diction. Word choice will make or break your work. Here, I think you've ...

*is entranced* That is so...*drools*...purty...

Today, the first day of spring, there were birds in my front lawn. I listened to them as I belted my jeans and smuggled my arms into a second sweater. ...

Comparing life to batteries is not a bad thing. Any metaphor can work if you pull it off. The thing is, what you've written isn't quite subtle enough. Metaphor. When ...

I want to feel your pain, or is it love? I'm not even sure what emotion this is being wrapped in. Instead I'm just being told a lot of things, ...