BlackGlasses

Green = Suggested Correction , oh how he rembered remembered and sent him spawling sprawling onto his back Silly mistakes! Seriously, the best things you can do before you post ...

I jumped off my tree and started running on all fours. I was faster than them, but I smelled that some of them brought dogs and horse horses, not horse? ...

Red = Replacement Blue = Comment As the battle continued to streak on, Firecrow snuck under the rough raised section in the lower right hand section Get rid of one ...

Welcome to YHS. Most people will tell you that you're encouraged to critique two works before you post your own, but regardless... First of all I'd like to say that ...

This needs to be split up into paragraphs first of all. I've taken the liberty of cutting it up a little for the sake of readability. Red = Replacement Blue ...