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Re: It's Like Looking For Home
.....I'm not sure of this....I'm a fan of rhyme so I don't like your poem. 2nd, you have nice thoughts, contrasts, comparisons and metaphors but without that you got nothing. ...
Jan 17, 2009 -
Re: It's Like Looking For Home
What do I need to remember? Was it important? It's warm here regardless of the snow surrounding every cave; stealing life from the crevices. I'll hold it in my hand ...
Jan 17, 2009 -
Re: Betrayal
Good Ma'am, I'm obviously no pro at poetry, but this is my opinion. I don't think this is bad. I think you have a misunderstanding here. You're word use leads ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: I beg of you
To my best friend [Shauni] . This is for you. Judge it as you want. Be harsh, don't be. Hate it, love it. I'm here because of her. I only ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: "Do you feel as good as you put on?"
Good Ma'am (Ma'am I'm guessing), I disagree with those two. But that's just me I suppose. You're writing should be preserved in it's original state. You're the only one that ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: It's Like Going Home
Good Sir, I've found myself reading poetry a lot. I'll have to make an attempt at it soon! But I apologize if this seems over analyzed or anything but I ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: At what age did you start writing and
lol what awesome thread, My first story was in the 3rd grade who found a gold coin that granted all of his wishes, and eventually he became so obsessed with ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: I wish i was part of someone too.
Repetition is the only way you ever learn anything. You have to see it a million times from a million different views in order to really understand it, so don't ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: Save a life.
Normally I would pick it apart but I like this. It seems really generic and it has this feel of sadness from the narrator even though he is supposedly happy ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: Saddest Book
1. The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry 2. The Little Girl Who Was Forgotten By Absolutely Everyone (Even The Postman) by Katy Towell 3. The Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: Sweet lies
See I feel like it doesn't HAVE to be all "Teenage Angst" and honestly the only reason it screams that to me is because the rhyming scheme feels really elementary ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: I wish i was part of someone too.
Good Ma'am, I must say that you remind me of a girl that I am attached to. Might you be her in disguise? Actually in the relation I have to ...
Jan 16, 2009 -
Re: Why, hello there.
I am an all around fighter. It's part of the reason I'm joining the military. It's kind of a mind set you have to really examine I think. I practice ...
Jan 15, 2009 -
Re: Salvation's Show
My only advice is to change the line about the cash a bit; it doesn't quite fit in with the rest of the rhythm. I disagree with you here, I ...
Jan 15, 2009 -
Re: Emerald Green
Good Sir or Ma'am (I have not checked which one you are yet), When glanced over this I thought I would have to hammer you for some of your uses ...
Jan 15, 2009
