AnneFavory

I think I have to agree with the others. I'm not going to repeat what they said because I think you understood what they meant. However, I can give you ...

In general, I though it was very well written. It's straight to the point which is refreshing to see in poetry. The feeling is easily conveyed to the reader. Though ...

Yeah I do agree, putting it in stanzas would really help and make the poem that much better. Apart from that be careful with punctuation and grammar throughout the poem. ...