Angela

This was a very good story. When you can't write, write about how you can't write. :) So true, so true. I really liked this story. The ending is pretty ...

I don't get it. I think I understand what you are trying to convey, but if I may say so, you're doing apretty bad job of it. I've read better ...

This definitely has potential. Like, a lot of potential. Just a few fixes you might want to think about: The first time I ever met Monica, she was knee-deep in ...

I love this little tidbit of story. I have to agree with londoncalling though: It could use a few more sensory details. Also, when you say this bit: "My moment ...

I have to say, I think that the first 3 stanzas were better than the last bit. The first three were original. I got the feeling that you really felt ...

The first paragraph about the first sighting of the gypsies was quite powerful. Now, to the questions and suggestions: Questions: 1. Why does it matter if Gabriel has a rosary ...

This was a very good story. There were just a few things that I thought needed to be changed. In the bit about how your MC walked past this locker ...

A very good story. Maybe you want to clarify in the beginning, though, what's going on. I was lost for awhile, and it's harder to get into a story if ...

First of all, my condolences on the source of this masterpiece. Only very strong emotions could have evoked enough pain to write this. That aside, I would say that you ...

This is a very good plot for a story, if perhaps a tad overdone. The part where Greg is revealed, that happened so fast it took me a bit to ...

This story was very touching, and truly amazing. It was sad, but at the same time not. It merely exposed the ugly side of the world in a very blunt, ...

This is a very very good story. I'm just curious: 1. You say that the narrator is eleven. It sounds like it was written from more of a 7-9 year ...

This story was so a touching, I could feel it manipulating its way into my heart. But I still am left wondering: 1. Is this entire thing one story? Or ...

This is such a good story. When you started talking about the suicide thing, I wanted to jump and shout 'Don't do it!'. It's a quite rare for a story ...

This is really good. In the short space it occupies, it really moved me. But I don't understand: Is the narrator being abuse? Is she (I think it's a she) ...