AmairaRose

Thank you both. I will work on improving this poem more.

Yes, sorry for the really confusing chapters. I have started to fix the problems, and have also started a re-write. This time the characters know each other names in the ...

Funny how some dreams come true, What matters is that they do- Funny how I feel for you, When I look into your eyes... I'm stepping out, Into a brand ...

I like the rhyming pattern. I can definatly sence the feeling behind the words, but if you put a little more imagery into this it could be better.

Once upon a time there was a girl She was lost and afraid And so, not knowing what to do She sought out revenge upon herself, the world, and evryhting ...

Very well written... Though, I must agree with what the othrs suggest. Also, you use the wrong tense of catches in this sentence. : A lose thread on her shirt ...

Hiya, I'm new here. You can call me Amaira. Or ChiA, which is my more common art pen name.

The only critique I have is the mispelling of taste in line 5 of stanza 1. Otherwise I'd say this is very well written with a good amount of detail.