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Re: As The World Goes Dark
This is kind of an intro to the next part of the story which is sort of dystopianish, so i might get somewhere in the relm of post apocalyspe later.
Thu Apr 16, 2026 8:02 pm -
Re: As The World Goes Dark
I am glad you enjoyed. For some clarity a couple of choices about the character Aaron is a little inserferable to an outside veiw, but from the inside, he is ...
Tue Apr 14, 2026 4:51 am -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter Two
They only spent like an hour and a half at the party and since dinner party's usually start like later and stuff it was only later 8 or 7:30 when ...
Wed Dec 17, 2025 6:10 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter Two
Also they are out at a restaurant because Sam does not want to be home, and also does not want to socialize and pretend to be happy, to Jebediah has ...
Mon Dec 15, 2025 8:15 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter Two
I understand some of your confusion. Let me explain. First of all, the reason they split up at the party is because these are Sam's freinds, and not jebediah's. Jebediah ...
Mon Dec 15, 2025 8:13 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Thanks for the comment. I totally understand the long wait inbetween, I have a lot going on during my days. I loved the feed back, will post chapter two soon.
Wed Sep 24, 2025 5:43 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Thanks for the advice. I am still working one editing.
Wed Sep 17, 2025 4:07 am -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Hey Alex, I did some editing and fixed some of the things you suggested. Most of the edits are in the second half after the little dash page break.
Fri Sep 12, 2025 4:50 am -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Thanks for this! This helps a lot!
Thu Sep 11, 2025 6:58 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Honestly, if you have any ideas on how to make Sam a character full of more depth other than just existing, I am unsure how to fix that. lol.
Mon Sep 08, 2025 7:27 pm -
Re: Not Strong Enough: Chapter One
Thanks for your review, it was very detailed and helped me in editing. I think things will become more clear as the story continues.
Mon Sep 08, 2025 3:24 pm -
Re: Future Pondering of a World Gone Dark: The first Installment.
I revised part of the story using some of your advise.
Tue Jul 01, 2025 1:58 pm -
Re: Letter Two. Ayla's POV
It's not about it being the best work, although I think it pretty good. This has so much emotion. What is the background behind this, how did this person die. ...
Wed Mar 12, 2025 3:07 am -
Re: Future Pondering of a World Gone Dark: The first Installment.
Thank You!
Tue Mar 11, 2025 3:15 pm -
Re: If not always, then forever
Thanks
Mon Mar 10, 2025 9:15 pm
