Winter:part 2

As we finished dinner I decided to retire to my bedroom for the night. I kissed my mother and father goodnight, I could hear their whispers as I left the dinning room, but I choose to discount it. I could tell they were worried about me, but I wasn’t acting any different. The only things different with me was my silence and my relationship status, other then that; the same old Beth Somers. I came into my same little baby powered bedroom and collapsed. I felt like checking my phone but I didn’t feel like it. It was across the room on the table that held my TV. The thought of walking over there just for a cell phone was foolish now. I laid there for a good few seconds, they felt like hours. I listened to the silence; this silence was a different then in Blair Meyer’s car. This silence was bearable. As I finally was soak in the silence’s warmth I heard noise, the noise of vibration. I meandered over to the table and pick up the cell phone; it felt as heavy as a rock. I had received a new text message; the number was unknown from contacts. It read a simple hey in the normal text font. I felt obligated to text it back, I always was a slight curious of who it could be. I quickly texted who is this? I prayed for it to be a five lettered name; Rosco. As I waited, I tried to not get my hopes up. I had looked at over half my lip glosses while looking at the birthday card Rosco had given me three weeks before. It said it fancy letter ________. When the card was opened three-dimensional roses popped out. I began to read the neat handwriting that was underneath the roses. Happy Birthday Cupcake! I hope this will be your best year yet! Love, Rosco. I took a deep breath, absorbing the emotions that filled me. Anger, Sadness, Regret danced through me, but sadness was the greatest out of the three. I wish the unknown text was from him, even though I knew his number by heart, I was hope and prayed it was Rosco. Any way shape or form, Angry or sad, to know he wanted to talk to me was better then not hearing anything from him at all. At last, I heard the vibrate of my cell phone, meaning a new text message had arrived. Suspense filled me as inhaled to prepare myself for opening my cell phone and gaining my fate, whatever it could be. As I opened disappointment washed over me. It’s Blair Meyer. read the text. I hung my head and decided to go on with a conversation with this stranger; he had invited me into his car out of kindness. Oh. Hi. Lol. How’d you get my number?? Please don’t let this be awkward like the car today. I thought to myself. I felt offensive for asking how he got my number but it was kind of odd to me. I felt stalked; first the car, now texting? He replied simply Colleen. Colleen had been my friend since sixth grade, her brother and Blair was also very close. Ah, I see. I didn’t know what to say back, this conversation was starting to be like the car today, except worse; I was falling asleep. I began to consider this was the less interesting talk of my young life and Blair would have to be the least interesting person I’ve ever met, comparing his personality to watching paint dry; but then I received the next text. Yeah, I’m sorry about today :/ I didn’t mean to make that awkward. His apology made me regret thinking all those horrible things about him, he was trying to show kindness towards me and I was using my negative outlook on males to stop any type of relationship. I decided I would be open-minded. I decided I would make an effort to try to have a well-mannered exchange of words with this person, for he was trying.
Oh, it’s fine. I wasn’t much better. Lol.
No, it was my fault, I nervous.
That’s silly! Your older then me!
Doesn’t mean I can’t be nervous How old are you?
15.
I’m 17.not that big of a difference.
Still, you’re older and senior. Lol.
I still get shy:) haha.
I couldn’t help but laughing. The thought of me making him “nervous” was entertaining. Blair wasn’t a small guy, he had a little extra weight on him and he had this macho attitude about him. I would see him occasionally walking down the hall with his group of cool, party-hard, senior guy friends. I would always look away, avoiding their eyes because I didn’t want to get caught staring at there attractiveness. I wondered if Blair ever saw me, what ran across his mind. I buried myself under my covers and thought of how god did kind of answer my prayer; he gave me a text from a five letter name, Blair.

Valentines Day was almost over. Thank god. The Somers’s Family decided to take a trip away from the city up to our mountain house. We spent the day skiing the slope while most people spent it with their love one. I kind of felt relieved though, I didn’t have to worry about the common things of a relationship and Valentine’s Day; looking nice for that special someone, getting a present, where to go for cupid’s holiday, what we do. It sort of felt surprisingly nice to be… single. I snuggled into my heated blanket that cover the twin bed I spent many winter nights in since I was 10years old. I felt on deserted island when we came to the mountain house; far away from all my problems, able to think without tension. Colleen had even texted me saying she Rosco with a new girl. It bothered me but didn’t hurt me amazingly. I missed him but didn’t feel the need to show my want to have him back. I wrapped the warm brown blanket around me and hopped over to the window with white satin curtains. I starred out into the sky looking at all the stars. The snow covered mountains looking close enough to touch the stars. I wondered if you climbed to the very top could touch one. I quickly reached for my phone and made a new message for Rosco. I found the big dipper:( I knew he wasn’t going to text back and it was fine. I wanted him to remember that night. Three days before the break-up Rosco took me a concert for one of my favorite local bands. Before the band played, we snuck out of the club and walk around the back of it. We sat on someone’s steps of their house and kissed and looked at the stars, searching for the big dipper. I felt spontaneous and so loved that night. I hoped Rosco hadn’t forgotten that night. I continued to stair at the beauty out of my little bedroom window. I compared it to the city, I had never seen the stars in the city except for that night with Rosco; the buildings crowed the sky. I wondered if that’s why Rosco and I couldn’t find the big dipper that night, or maybe we were just too rapped up in that moment to make an effort. I felt my phone vibrate. Did Rosco really text me back? It doubtful but I open it anyway. It was from Blair Meyer. Happy Valentine’s Day. I decided to reply, I had nothing to lose and I had nothing better to attend to.
Ha:) thanks you too!
What did you do today?
Went skiing. You?
Did Rosco go with you?
Ha, no we broke up:(
What? Why?
Idk, he didn’t tell me why exactly:(
What a douche. Do you still like him?
That made me laugh; Blair didn’t even know Rosco but he already could call him that. I wondered if Rosco was just trying to make me feel better. I took a second to answer his question, my answer wasn’t certain.
Idk
Oh...well I’m sorry. I know how that feels.
Ugh, yeah. It sucks, doesn’t it?
Yeah it does. Try three years of dating someone.
Oh wow...
Yeah:(
?
Do you know Corrie Whittington?
Hmm. No, I don’t know any upperclassmen.
Yeah well that’s her.
Oh. I’m sorry. Why did it end?
Like, she was really controlling and didn’t want me to party, and would get mad at me all the time.
Oh  that stinks, I’m sorry.
It’s fine. It was my fault...
How?
I said I love you too much.
I understand that feeling...
I suddenly felt great empathy for Blair. Sure, his reputation was a “party boy”. Sure, he seemed undomesticated, impolite, and at times, idiotic. However, deep, deep down inside, he seemed just to be a sensitive guy who just may want love. This was an odd outcome for me. How’d we even come to this conversation I wondered. I didn’t even know this person had known this guy knew my existence two days ago; now I found myself relating to him? How could I open up that easy?
With Rosco?
I suddenly felt regret for opening a can of worms. I didn’t want conversation like this with anyone, not even my closest friend, but here I was; chatting with a total stranger, explaining a break-up that had left me an emotional mess. Was that why I was felt safe telling him this? Because the process of being dump by someone I truly cared about had brought me to this level? How far more was I going to lower?
Yep.
How do you figure that?
Idk:(
Come on Beth. Trust me.
I don’t even know you. Lol.
I know, but do you not want to?;)
How does someone answer that? I wondered to myself. Before I had entered the car I had thought I had nothing to lose, but I hadn’t ever expected for Blair to text me and find interested in discussing with me. Do I really want to? This question kept crossing my mind over and over. This person seemed to have interest in me, why would I push that away when I have no one interested?
I guess so:)

Um why is this in art and Photography?