Mistress WriMo

Close the book, break into a sweat,
hands a dance, words appear.
A soul is gripped, gripped by the blur,
of necrotising text, you flesh out and
damn.

You could be in Rapture, fighting Splicers,
or in the middle of the east, where mad
and militant men dwell, shooting them
full of holes, showing the flaws in their
holy wars.

She speaks, and snakes her way through
cortexes, whispering words, suggesting
this or even that, a force that comes every
year, she even shuns you if you fall.

You could be on youtube, checking out
the latest vid, listening to pandora, or
even LastFM, doesn't matter, don't care,
she won't rule your life.

Her sinister secrets ride the incessant pitch,
of keys a-typing, imagination blurring, chapters,
and lines combining and twisting, driving the mind,
driving the state.

You could on a MMO, whether it's WoW or
many many more, not like you care, not like
it matters, you must escape, avoid the plight,
her poision and cynanide quill you lick, with
letter you hit.

All of this you wish and more,
but strung to your chair, watching
the glare, blinking and sighing as now know,
trapped by that undefinable mistress, for
a month, and you can only scream.

I'm so not doing this next year!

Oh, how this gets me excited for this month I've never done WriMo before but I have a feeling that it's going to be kind of how you described it. It makes me nervous and delighted at the same time.

But this is very intense, I think you captured all the emotion you were looking for perfectly. Good word choices and length.

Oo! A poem on NaNoWriMo! That's actually what I'm supposed to be doing right now.

Anyway, I like this. It really shows how NaNo takes over your life for a month, which I am about to find out (this being my first year). And is it safe to assume that this is your way to procrastinate?

So, nice word usage, nice visualization. I didn't really see any grammar issues, though I just read through this once. Overall, I like this. (And yes, I know, I suck at reviewing poetry. But, really, who can tear apart a piece about NaNoWriMo on November 1st?)

*likes*

loveness, ultraviolet <3

Heh, I found this to be pretty humorous. I liked the different stanzas of what you could be doing, all of which sound endlessly more pleasant than being trapped by that undefinable mistress.

You struck an interesting style in this poem. In some stanzas I think it works, but in others I'm not sure it does. For instance, ending the first stanza on "damn" seems more like you were trying to fit the poem into a specific style than letting the style shape the poem. Instead, play around with it and see how you can fit the poem into the form.

I'd also suggest getting rid of 'MMO', and re-wording the rest of that stanza accordingly. The problem is that most abbreviations require special knowledge. So even if you know the abbreviation, you have to stop and think about it. And if you don't know it, then you're lost and the poem is over. So unless the abbreviation has entered the general lexicon of your audience, skip it. WoW, on the other hand, I think is in the general lexicon of the audience you're shooting for.

Overall, I rather enjoyed this.