Mansfield Park rant

Okay. So, I was reading this. I'm not done with it... I only got a quarter through, but I am not really happy with it. The characters are complete losers and I am losing patience with Miss Austen.

First of all...

Fanny... really? REALLY? If there was a definition of spineless wimp, I am pretty sure she would be the picture. She's meek and mild and ohsogentle and completely naive and useless. I mean... really?! She also only really bothers to talk to Edmund, who she kind of loves, but she is so blind to him that she can't understand that he can be attracted to other women. I understand the whole, "But I love him!" bit, but she has no feelings of jealousy or anything?

Oh yeah... that's right. She's PERFECT. Her main problem is that she is weak and that makes Edmond fawn over her. Oh, and Edmond's like, "I will brainwash you and make you believe everything I say." Her response? "YAY! HE'S PAYING ATTENTION TO ME."

And this is after Austen goes on and on about how the family tries to take care of her fairly? Obviously it wasn't fair... but to go into emotional abuse? What the heck?

And Edmond. At first, I liked him. Now I want to stab out his eyes. I think he's completely oblivious and clueless and more about making people agree with him than actually being open with people. Not good for someone going into religion, I think. Nobody likes taking in orders from people who won't bother to understand them. And, he's dishonest with himself. He thinks he likes Miss Crawford, but really, she's a piece of work. And that would just lead to arguments. Maybe she's right about the clergy marrying disagreeable people. Holy crap.

Miss Crawford? A piece of work. She is stupid and snide and rude and I hate her on so many levels. The only saving grace that she has is that she plays harp.

Mr. Crawford is a player and I don't like him. He doesn't know what he wants and, frankly, it doesn't look like he gives a crap over anyone but himself. He'll toy with people's emotions and ruin them without a second thought. Bad news, no?

Tom? He's oblivious and stupid and doesn't care about anyone but himself. At least he's honest about it, right?

The Miss Bertrams are petty people who only do things for their own amusement.

The older adults are also singularly horrible.

Anyway! I'm only a fourth through. So yeah. Not sure if maybe there is a sudden HUGE RECONCILIATION AFTER BIG MISUNDERSTANDING. But, I am hopeful that all the characters will die or be miserable.

Or! Maybe Fanny will be like River Tam (Firefly, Serenity) and start KICKING EVERYBODY'S ASS because of some government-sponsored brainwashing thing... probably something that Edmond created... and then everybody DIES except her. And then she gets trampled by her horse she needs for exercise.

Dude, I read somewhere that Fanny was her favourite character. O.o

Well. Okay. I am about halfway through (a little more), and I no longer want to stab out Fanny's eyeballs. I still think feeding her to the sharks would be a serious consideration, but that's not so bad. Even so, she is a weak, spineless female who doesn't do anything but wring her hands and worries about being noticed. She acts like she was abused and, while Mrs. Norris does kind of abuse her, the rest of them don't really do anything and Edmond makes sure she's taken care of, unless he doesn't. So, yes, it kind of makes sense, but it doesn't. So yeah.

However! I don't no longer want to kill all the characters! William Price and Sir Thomas are pretty cool. The rest of the characters? Guh. We'll see.

Okay, so I'm not finished yet, but I think I know why Fanny drives me nuts. It's the way she's perceived by people. I mean, yeah, she's terrified and she's been terrified for a while and everything, so that can't really be helped. But everybody's like, "Oh, what a gentle girl! How wonderfully self-sacrificing she is!" Like, that is one of the only reasons why Henry is even interested in her. He sees her as kind of a footstool. And I don't like this. I wish I could step into her life and give her a rant on why feminism is the best thing ever. But... um... I can't. Because it's just a book.

I know how you feel about Fanny. But I reckon that's possibly part of the book's charm is watching Fanny grow a backbone.

HOWEVER. I read it just before I turned sixteen. And I was rooting for Henry the whole way through. Edmund's just kind of boring. *face/palm*

I like how this shows your growth through the book, the learning of characters. One should never judge a book by the cover - or by the first three quarters.