Lucita

***I'm determined to write a quick short story every day until I find a plot that I can keep up with. Soo...here goes nothing. Anyway, a little bit about this: it's a modified true story, with just some minor tweaks and changes. No names are real. It's a very rough story, I wrote it up in five minutes, so tear it apart. Thanks for reading and I hope you'll review!***

It was yet another typical day in Cornerstone Academy, our 8th-grade class identifying extremely similar dull gray rocks.
"What about this one?" my partner Mandy asked, raising what looked like a hard red-and-black sponge.
I just shrugged. I didn't talk much...well, I didn't really talk at all. If Mrs. Giles hadn't assigned the partners, I probably would've gotten the short end of the stick and ended up with one of the guys goofing off on the other side of the room. I liked Mandy, though; she was bright and quirky and somebody I wished I had the guts to be like. Maybe if I would get over my shyness and talked to her we could be friends. Who knew?
After many defeated attempts at identifying various minerals, the two of us sank into our chairs. I felt a little guilty. After all, she'd probably been hoping to be with someone, anyone in class but me. I wasn't insanely smart when it came to this stuff, I didn't pay attention, I rarely talked and when I did I just sounded like a moron stuttering; heck, I could've been replaced with a potato and she might not have known the difference!
It was then that the door swung open, in stepping a girl with long black hair and olive skin. Beside her stood the school counselor, Mr. Simms.
"Class, I'd like you to meet Lucita. Her family just arrived from Ecuador, and doesn't know much English, so please welcome her to your class and help her to improve her English while she's here."
Lucita watched with fearful eyes as Mr. Simms left, then turning to scan her roomful of new classmates.
"Lucita, you may take the seat beside Jamie and Mandy," Mrs. Giles said, motioning towards Mandy and I. Shyly, Lucita took the seat beside me.
"Hi, Lucita!" Mandy said cheerily, with her normal enthusiasm, though speaking a little slower and making sure to enunciate. "My name is Mandy."
"Me llama es Jamie," I said quietly, hoping that my rusty Spanish would be translatable.
Lucita's expression brightened a little. "Hablar Espanol?" she questioned hopefully.
"No, no mucho," I said. "Little."
She nodded, biting her lip nervously. Lucita was even more shy than I was! Her shoulders hunched over, seeming to shrink inside herself as she flipped through a translation book.
"What we do in...em...Science?" she asked, her speaking a little difficult to understand.
I racked my brain for a translation, to no avail. "Umm...Rocks?" I blinked, hoping that she would be able to understand. She nodded, staring at the stones spread out on the table before us.
"Rocks?" she asked, pointing to the stones.
"That's right," Mandy said, nodding happily.
We didn't get much actual science done that day, but luckily Mrs. Giles decided to relieve the three of us from the task today. After talking to the vice principle, she also offered me the task of being Lucita's translator for a week or two. Every morning, I met Lucita at the entrance, the two of us heading to her class, then I went to mine. We happily made our way to classes that we had together, and spent each lunch with her practicing English and me practicing Spanish. Pretty soon, our bilingual conversations were becoming second-nature. Both of us opened up a little more, and my stuttering even went away the more I worked with Lucita. Secretly, I think I learned more from her than she did from me. Even when my time was done to help her to and from classes while helping her with her English, the two of us kept up the daily routine.
Lucita brought the best from me, so that I was no longer "Jamie the outcast". Mandy and I became friends also, but Lucita has been and always will be the truest friend I've ever had. Lucita showed me that speaking is nothing but a barrier that divides you from others, and getting past it you find the person for who they really are.

Great work! But I can see how you've compressed the plot that belongs in a book. Here in a short story, it sounds rushed at the end. I really think you could do this in a much, much longer version.
I still have no idea what they were supposed to be doing with the rocks, nor of anything else about their school, but since that information is somewhat unnecessary, you did good to put it out of focus.
Something that you shouldn't have put out of focus was the 'I' person's name, I looked back and couldn't find it!
...
No wait, found it. Right where the teacher tells Lucita to sit next to her. Ah, ahem. XD. But anyways, it came kinda late, you might want to put it in kinda early, like in Mandy's dialogue.
That's all i have.
Jenth

Good job. I liked how it wasn't your cliche high school story about girl meets boy . But mostly I just wanted to correct your Spanish. Now, the extent of my Spanish comes from the hellish semester I spent in AP Spanish 4 (and thus, granted, also four years of spanish, as well as living in a bilingual area), but I know that "me llama es Jamie" should be "me llamo Jamie", and "Hablar Espanol?" should be "¿Hablas español?", considering she is speaking to a peer (and they don't capitalize names of languages). My Spanish teacher always stressed to us how "me llamo es" was the surest way to identify yourself as a gringo; that it was always, always just "me llamo" (directly translated it would mean something like "to me they call"). Although Jamie's Spanish is rusty, if she knew enough to translate for Lucita I think she would also know this, and Lucita would know to say "hablas".
Hahah, I'm sorry for this little lecture on Spanish that you probably didn't want, but I couldn't really restrain myself, it was like a knee-jerk reaction. On the plus side, this will make your story a little more authentic .

Oops, thanks on that Attolia, I didn't catch that! Haha, you might have noticed my Spanish isn't exactly brilliant...I meant to mess up on Jamie's but I didn't catch the mistake on Lucita's, so thanks. Thanks also J (can I call ya J? Too bad, I will ) you make a lot of good points, I'll revise this when I can.

Hi Story.

I wouldn't bother revising this - just scrap it and start fresh.
You begin this as a hopeful, fleshed-out story, and for whatever reason decide to cram a cliched moral into the concluding paragraphs. This is too rushed. Don't write something in five minutes and expect it to be a complete, workable piece.
You've got too much telling going on, as well. The story is more along the lines of, "I'm an outcast, I wish I was this girl's friend, I took Spanish classes" kind of description (or lack thereof). Apply setting, emotion, and more dialogue to your work to produce a realistic and interesting scene that you can build your story off of.

Keep writing.
Hap