Ah yes, Spiral strikes again. Hmm, lets see, where to begin...
So this is interesting, as usual, but it is a bit...bland...seems like it was one of those things you just had to write and get it over with, but it could be a bit better. the whole thing is a bit of an info dump. Sure, details great, but too many make it boreding, which is something I myself, have to work on. Over all though, I am excited for the next peice, this story interests me. Keep Writing! ~Shaard. P.S. I would recommend posting the whole next chapter at once, instead of breaking it up. It's rather annoying having to wait.
I hate cynicism -- it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you, amazing things will happen. - Conan O'Brien
