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Like Every Great Nation

NonFictionIdot

Gender

Points 1802

Reviews 5

Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:42 am

NonFictionIdot says... · Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:42 am

I know its a bit repetative, but this is what i have.

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One day I will rise,
And other I will fall!
Like every Great Nation,
I'll be like them all.
I'll get to my peak
and can't go any further.
Like every Great Nation,
There will be a great fall.
But unlike every Great Nation,
Mine will be slow and small!

Forestqueen808

Gender

Points 8414

Reviews 151

Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:53 am

Forestqueen808 says... · Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:53 am

Hi! I really liked this piece I only saw one thing that really bugged me!

And other I will fall!

I think you mean, "And another I'll fall!" or something like that. Otherwise it was good!
Great job! :smt023

Sorrow lasts through this night
I'll take this piece of you,
and hold for all eternity
For just one second I felt whole... as you flew right through me.

~Sorrow by Flyleaf