Character Sketch ~ Harsh Critiques Needed!

Hello!~
I have another sketch that I would like you guys to do your magic thing and shred the hell out of this drawing. You guys have done so in the past, and I would love again for your input.

This character is from the main novel I am working on and his name is Jaimes. The sun like symbol you will see on his armour resembes the symbol of the Fire dynasty Lareina. That name has a secret meaning, and I will see if any of you can pick up on it. xD

I was mainly working on armour and slightly proportion, but understand, I am far from being close at being good with proportion. My arms I believe are way off, and my faces are hilarious. But this again is drawn in my... unique style. I need ideas on how to fix this. The original was drawn too light so I had to darken them using the computer. I hope you don'y mind. Well, here is Jaimes.



Please, I want to get better as much as I can, and any input you can give will help.
Forever in your debt,
~Incognito

Howdy, holy cow, and ohmigoodnessgraciousme. This is amazing. I'm gonna have to scan the forum for more of your work! I can't draw like this, but I can see what's wrong with this, so let's see...

So, you noticed the face (it's fine except for the nose - it's too round for this angle) and the arms (which, through measuring and estimating, are perfect, so pat yourself on the back for me). Otherwise, awesome. The few things I noticed that were odd were so detailed that I had to get out paint and circle them. Look at the attachment, the points are symbolized with symbols in red.

Square: It feels like the clothing under the armor is, well, cloth. But this segment right here is weird. It makes me think he's wearing some other kind of metal, while everything else suggests skin-tight cloth. Question mark?

Triangle: I don't know much about anatomy and I always miss those collarbones, but what's this? I'm not sure if there's supposed to be a line going up here. If I'm wrong, forgive me.

Squiggly: He has very angled, focused eyebrows, like the elves from the Lord of the Rings movie. Thing is, those elves were actors who shaved off their eyebrows and painted on the pointy ones. Never have I seen a man want to shape his eyebrows like that. Apologies if this is how it's supposed to be, this one truly is a nitpick, personal opinion.

And around the... his right foot, I can see, even from straight ahead, where you cleaned it up on the computer. This isn't a huge deal, it's just poking me to tell you about it. And a little more shading around his left leg would look grand.


Okay, that's all I can see. I love your style! It's like (ew, I just said "like"), anime meets human proportions and realistic lines. It's so cool! The hair is awesome, but that one point where it's shaped like a bunny ear, but it's awesome.

Augh, I could go on and on with you about it, but I've yammed in your ear enough for one night. Great job, Incognito! Gold star from moi.

-Tex

'Ello, 'ello.

Firstly praise is in order. This is gorgeous, I really like the fierce look on his face! He looks ready for battle!

Ok so here are the things I noticed:

His shoulders seem incredibly broad for a 3/4 angle (thats what it is right?). The one on his right side should be closer to his body.

The shield also looks remarkable odd. Perhaps find a circular object, place it on the angle you want to see and see how it looks.

He also looks a little hunched up. This might be because of the already mentioned shoulder angle thing.

Oh and as the previous post mentioned, some more shading might perhaps be in order.

Great job all the same though!

Incog, this is marvelous. Great work on pose and proportion. Great drawing for the most part.



Red - Pay attention to that thigh; it's a bit thin and straight. I know he's not a terribly muscular character, but the thigh is slender; it's about the same size as the otherone which is turned out and closer. It should still be a little thicker, and not as straight.


Blue - Same with the bicep; give it muscular form. Right now, it looks a little lumpy, and straight, dear.

Purple - See his collarbones? It's a little pet peeve of mine when artists raw the collarbone-lines over the clothes. They'll showthrouh fabric, but not so prominent. Through armor, probably not. Keep them under the clothes.

Green - His hair is flat! It needs a bit of shading and dramatizing-- also, for his chest plates, shading could be good.

Other than that, great work on this all, Incog. Great job shading, and superb work on that face.

June

:O People went all out here! Wow-y. Lovely Incog! Unfortunately I do not know how to do that marvelous colouring so I'll have to type up my suggestions:

Face --

- His nose is a little bit too rounded. Thus taking up much of his face and looking strange on his more realistic face

http://www.portrait-artist.org/face/nose3.html

- His eyebrows are squiggly little lines! Give them more dimension and make them more naturally arched down.
- As mentioned before, his hair is 2-D because there is so little shading. Try to add some shading to and more of a round effect.
- The little rounded diamond piece of hair looks off, give it a more natural, split up shape.

Neck/Torso--
- The chest plate is very nicely done but deserves a little bit more shading attention. Define a light source and shade in compared to where the light hits.

Limbs/ Limb extensions--
- The right thigh is too straight as Juniper said. Round it out, and more of a muscular structure.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_gJAaRVFNav4/Sk0Nhr121qI/AAAAAAAAAGg/W_SsfyErm7c/s400/thigh+muscles.bmp

-The feet and leg amour are fabulous in my opinion.

-The left arm is bumpy and strangely shaped. I suggest fixing that.
-His hand! The sword hand! It is so small! Humans have very large hands. They look quite small and dainty, I suggest you make them bigger.

Details--
-I personally find the shield sort of small and oddly placed. Shields should cover most of the upper arm at least and are usually bigger. I suggest making it a little bit longer.
-The shading and proportions you did make me jealous! Marvelously done!

Fabulous work Incog! I hope that was harsh enough for you

~Kamas

Sorry it took so long, But I'm here!

OK so the little things I saw that needed fixing, were:

The neck. The line up the side extends too far up, making it seem as if his neck is very thin and tiny.

The arms. They are on the skinny side, try adding in some more muscles. You got the length about right, but the elbow seems a little funky for some reason.

The shield. I know it's supposed to be at an angle, but the way it's drawn it looks like he's holding only half a shield.

The sword. In my humble opinion, a warrior looking guy like this should be carrying a knights sword, not a cutlass. It's very well drawn though, a little bit small.

The legs and feet. The thigh on his right is almost the right size, just a tad bit larger then it should be. His right foot is extended towards the viewer,I can see that, but again its too big. Left thigh is just under the right size, barely, but it is. His left foot I think is fine.

You did an amazing job on this picture! The armor is so well drawn, you impressed even my perfectionist older brother...congrats. Shading is good, and I loved the spiky shoulder things!! Total awesomeness. Great job!! I hope this helped! You're a great artist, keep drawing!!!

~Hope

Wow, Incog. You weren’t kidding when you said that you could draw. I’m epically in love with this picture right now and in fact, I think you’ve got something pretty awesome right here. Obviously, people have basically picked it apart already, but I just wanted to say that this was much epic and proves that you’ll make an awesome member of the art team.

~lilymoore

I think the head is too small. It is what caught my eye first and i think it would look better just a bit bigger. And the right thigh is a little thin. Other than that, i love it. You are lucky you can actually draw your characters. I never could. Great drawing. I would love to see you draw something like a warrior girl maybe. That would be cool.

Thank you all for your reviews. they are quiet helpful. Just some comments I have in response. xD

Okay, You gues compliment me on my shading, but truth be told, it is not very shaded at all. If it was shaded then you would be able to tell that the 'unmuscular legs' were actuall covered in slight plate armour. I know it is quite confusing. That is also why it appears to thin and stright. But he is one leg should actuall be thicker once you think about it because the armour is bigger then his actual leg. Just thought to let you know. If it was shaded you would be able to tell that a lot more easily.

Then that block thing at his one side was actually apart of the harness to keep his chest plate on. It is actually quite necessary or else the armour wouldn't work.

There is a small line on his neck that seems a bit off. That is actually because it is the vein/tendon thingy in peoples necks that when you turn your head you can kind of see. It shouldn't have been that prominent, and I understand that to be my mistake.

If I hade shaded it, you would have been able to tell that there is no clothing under his chest plate as what was worn by mostly the old gladiator fighters. The two lines on his neck are actually a part of a pendant he is wearing. I know a bit of an oddity. xD

I understand perfectly well that that shield is quite off. I was unsure how I would fix it though. Thank you guys for your advice on that. It is quite helpful.

I just thought to say that to clear everything up. Again, I thank you guys a lot for these reviews. YWS never ceases to amaze me at how well you guys can help others. You guys are awesome, almost certainly.

And about the small head comment, my drawing style is based a lot of realistic proportion. His head wouldn't be that much bigger because he just has broad shoulders. That is why it seems so much smaller. If it was drawn in more anime style, his head would actually be quite large. xD

I thank you guys again for all your help. You guys are amazing. Give yourself a pat on the back. xD

I am surprised nobody noticed the problem with his right shoulder. It looks like it is practically out of socket.

Thanks again!~
~Incognito

as soon as i saw the head and almost all of the upper body i was amazed but when i saw the whole of it, it didnt look so good now with some small changes this will look amazing the leg which is almost facing towards us is abit off also the way he is standing is abit funny aswell now with those 2 put together you have a sort of unbalanced character the shield is wrong it looks abit wonky also you should only beable to see almost half it only .

i would say more but the comments above have already said it i think

I am amazed at what you can do. I would not change anything about it I think it looks awesome and perfect and nothing should be changed.(ABSOLUTLY NADA)