Why???

People all around me,
Are moving at a fast pace,
I am glued in the centre
Struggling to cover the space.

What is this feeling,
Where endless sleep is all I need?
Why is this feeling?
I can’t catch up with the speed!

Falling in a deep, dark hole,
I beg you, lower a rope.
Don’t abandon me here
Without a single ray of hope.

What is this feeling,
Where I am alone in an icy land?
Why is this feeling?
Don’t I deserve a helping hand?

Every time I try, I fail
To clear out my mind.
I want to express my thoughts,
But words I cannot find.

What is this feeling,
Where my emotions I can’t show?
Why is this feeling?
I guess I’ll never know!

Hello! I quite like this poem, but as always there is room for improvement! I like the first stanza, however why do you need to "cover the space"? It sounds like you might have said this just to make that line rhyme with the second, which rarely ends well.

I like the beginning of the second stanza, and I like the repetition, but "why is this feeling" doesn't make sense. Perhaps reword this a little so that the repetition is still there, but it makes a bit more sense?

The third stanza...well, first we were standing in the centre of something, and now we're falling into a hole. Fair enough, but how about a but of a transition between the two? Did the ground open up suddenly beneath you, metaphorically? Maybe you should say so, or something else which explains how we got to this point. For the fourth stanza, again, it's good, but "why is this feeling?" doesn't make sense.

A couple of times you reversed sentences to make them fit: "where my emotions I can't show" and "but words I cannot find". It's not too bad, but again, it sounds obvious that you've said it this way just to make a rhyme.

The last stanza finishes off the poem nicely. One thing I would say is that the exclamation mark on the end makes the whole poem sound a bit light-hearted, but surely you're not light-hearted, because you can't keep up with people around you, you've fallen into a hole, there is no hope, etc. So consider taking this out, because it doesn't seem to fit with what you've been saying. Overall though, pretty good! Keep writing.

Hi! I'm going to be a little backwards and start with the conclusion of this poem. To be honest, that very last line was quite a let-down. Which, in some ways, says good things about the rest of the poem. You ask so many intriguing questions, and talk about this person's desperate efforts to find the answers to those questions, only to have them give up! Now we'll never know the answers to those questions either!
As it is, you're kind of leaving us hanging. Even if you still have the person give up, I'd like to see you hint at the answers, answers that maybe the person doesn't want to know? We don't even know why they gave up so easily. It's kind of abrupt; we don't get to *see* them give up. It sounds kind of casual, like they don't really care that they'll never know, like it's no big deal, which contradicts the rest of the poem.

I do want to mention punctuation briefly. I felt a little smothered by how much you have. Keep in mind, every comma is a pause. Try reading it out loud, with those pauses, and I think you'll see what I mean.

You have three situations, three places, that this person is in: glued in the centre, falling in a hole, and alone in an icy land. It might tie the whole poem together more if you found one image to use throughout the whole poem; you can start with it, and then go on each time to describe it further.
If nothing else, I don't think you really need "alone in an icy land". It doesn't seem to connect with the lines around it; it feels like you just stuck it in there because it rhymes. Never sacrifice anything for a rhyme; then the rhyme won't work either.

Overall this is a pretty good piece! You have some good images (you bring across the hopeless feeling well); I'd just like to see you sort through those images and find away to tie them together. And please consider what I said about the ending!

-Adna

Really powerful.

The stereotypical emotion was put across a little differently here with great construction of sentences and concepts.And I guess something about the rat race also was put across very well.

Keep writing

I like the deep emotional within the poem. Plus, the ending is creative.

Keep writing & can't wait to read more.