Take your crits like a soldier, Private Twinkletoes!

I couldn't say "man" in the title -- that's a one-way trip to a beatdown from half the members in this forum, I suspect. :/

I think we all get butterflies in our stomach at the thought of people criticizing something we've written. People take critiques differently: some have had the benefit of hundreds, if not thousands of critiques on their work, and so it's another day at the office. Some are inherently graced with the right mix of self-esteem and humility to accept the imperfections in their work and incorporate suggestions right away.

And then there are those who aren't.

I don't count myself as one of the first two kinds of people above, so I'm compiling a list of tips that'll calm me down when I'm reading a critique of my work. Hopefully, they might be of use to someone else, too!

Let's start with my list of DON'TS.

1) DON'T excuse your writing.
Reviewers critique expecting answers. The trick is to put those answers within the context of your writing. Do not answer them directly, that is, by explaining every detail and nuance through a reply or PM -- defending your writing defeats the whole purpose of critique anyway, and I guarantee there's no better way to make indentations in a reviewer's keyboard/wall/forehead than out and out telling them important details, such as "Well, [character name here] is supposed to be The Chosen One, which is why he's being treated so nicely by the villagers even though he has rabies." Giving away such details ruins any future objective critique that reviewer might have given you.

That said, you can always argue a point with a reviewer if you feel like they are wrong. Of course, don't be a jerk about it. It's always acceptable to be like "well, I see where you're coming from, but there was a reason behind why I did..." Or "I respect your opinion, however I think I'll keep this part the way it is." As the author, you always have the final say in what advice you decide to take. (Thanks for pointing this out, OverEasy!)

2) DON'T ignore good critiques.
You asked for critique, and you got one. But what's this? HOLY BOVINE ARMPITS, BATMAN, you just got slapped with a five-page essay! Your eyes fly over the page, snag on the critical bits, and before long you're in your happy place. The critique goes more or less unread.

Before you go for the big X in the corner of your browser window, consider the effort that reviewer put forth -- a long review means they cared about your story, and show interest in future installments. I haven't written many reviews (7 as of press time), but I make sure my reviews are thorough, even if it takes me upwards of an hour to do so. At the very least, thank the reviewer for their time (that's something you do for EVERY critique, of course). Then, go through their critique looking for suggestions -- focusing on them instead of what you did wrong keeps your self-esteem at healthy levels since you can take action.

3) DON'T abandon your current draft.
Ditching your writing after a critique is tantamount to slapping your reviewer in the face with a Mack truck filled with radioactives and fire. Why should they bother helping you if you're only going to throw their advice away with your story? I understand you may have gotten another idea that'll take your story in a different direction, and that's a point I'll cover later. The best advice here is to keep writing the story you have, implementing changes that may not fit with what your beginning sets up if it comes to that -- all while keeping your reviewer's suggestions in mind.

4) DON'T submit first drafts.
Possibly the best way to preserve your sanity when being critiqued is to avoid submitting a piece that'll get critiqued. A little Zen, and a little preposterous, I know -- who writes perfectly here? -- but think about it. As I brought up in point 3, if you suddenly got a new idea for your story while writing, there's little reason for you to jump the gun and post the old draft you're not going to use. By not submitting a first draft (which, I believe, you shouldn't be doing according to forum rules/suggestions/guidelines [/Barbossa]), that also implies you spell and grammar-checked your writing, as well as tightened up loose parts and loosened tight parts you might be called out on later. The result is less stress while reading a critique since you're not going "Stupid me! I totally should've caught that! -defenestrate-"

Now let's move onto my DO'S.

1) DO let the critique cool off.
Admit it -- you are proud of whatever you just submitted to the forums for review. You actually wrote something! Oh, and look!Someone's already made a reply...

One panicked read through their words later, and your buzz is all but staked in the heart. Never mind what positives your reviewer might have included, your faith in your writing dwindles, and you feel like crawling into a coffin for a month.

Or! Give the critique a day or two to cool with your writing. It's an old editing rule that you shouldn't revise your writing the day after you wrote, since you're still too familiar with the words and your mind may fill in or omit parts other readers will notice amiss (Like this one: Taking time away from your writing will allow you to see your writing for what it is, not what you think it is, and will help lessen the critique's trauma.) I don't eat Korean tofu stew while it's still boiling in the bowl, and I believe we're all metaphorical enough to guess what I mean there. This goes hand in hand with

2) DO pretend you didn't write it.
It's a lot of fun reading through other people's work to find what doesn't work all that well, and what really shines out in the mind. So do the same for yours -- for the purpose of reading critique, pretend they're for someone else's story and suppress the urge to go, "But! But!" You'll enjoy the crit process, and may even have a healthy laugh at some of the ridiculous things that popped up in "some other person's" writing.

3) DO realize it's not personal.
First off, ANY critique that blatantly insults you, the writer, instead of your work should be ignored and possibly reported to the mods. Otherwise, stop thinking your reviewer is out to get you. There is a human being on the other side of your monitor who has taken an interest in your story, and though you may feel their critique stings at times, that could just be how your reviewer critiques. As human beings, reviewers aren't perfect and will make reasonable apologies if their critique was too stringent. A good critique puts only the writing at stake, not the author, and it's much easier to accept critique once you realize that.

That's as much as I've been able to come up with. I'm sure I've missed more. I know I'm still a novice on this forum and I hope that doesn't invalidate what I've tried to say here. Let me know by reply or PM if this post was helpful, or if you have other ways of coping with critiques.

And that's all I have to say about that.

=Hyun

1) DON'T excuse your writing.
Reviewers critique expecting answers. The trick is to put those answers within the context of your writing. Do not answer them directly, that is, by replying to them -- defending your writing defeats the whole purpose of critique anyway, and I guarantee there's no better way to make indentations in a reviewer's keyboard/wall/forehead than out and out telling them important details, such as "Well, [character name here] is supposed to be The Chosen One, which is why he's being treated so nicely by the villagers even though he has rabies." Giving away such details ruins any future objective critique that reviewer might have given you.

THIS.

You are officially my hero now. I no longer have to restate the same thing over and over again in responses to critiques since you've condensed it down to a single concise explanation.

And the bit about not taking critiques personally as well. Very, very true.

This is all some very good advice. You don't have to be nervous about posting it because you're a novice, if you have constructive things to say then it shouldn't matter how many posts you've racked up or how many stars are under your avatar. ^^

Ahahaha, holy cow, reading back over this confronts me with a very clear reason I included Don't #4. Look at me, mixing my metaphors and leaving stuff out!

I actually wrote that first Don't with you in mind, Bick, so it's you I have to thank for that. Glad I'm your hero now.

=Hyun

I'd just like to say that you can always argue a point with a reviewer if you feel like they are wrong. Don't be a jerk about it, but I think it's always acceptable to be like "well, I see where you're coming from, but there was a reason behind why I did..." Or "I respect your oppinion, however I think I'll keep this part the way it is."

As the author you always have the final say in what advice you decide to take.

Just thought I'd throw that out there.

I'd just like to say that you can always argue a point with a reviewer if you feel like they are wrong. Don't be a jerk about it, but I think it's always acceptable to be like "well, I see where you're coming from, but there was a reason behind why I did..." Or "I respect your oppinion, however I think I'll keep this part the way it is."

Well said. I was wondering how to phrase that and ended up leaving it out, so thanks for coming to my rescue.

I have some more "do"s:

~ Do take advantage of the "If you have any questions, PM me!" line that happens at the bottom of almost every review. If you look at a review and they say your character looks cliched but they don't say why, PM them asking why. Not only will you get an answer, you'll also make the critic know that they might want to consider explaining things more in their reviews so people know where they are coming from.

~ Do take what the critic is saying as a suggestion only. If they point out a fundamental flaw in a work and have a very good reason to back it up, look at your work and again, ask them what they mean. But if they point out something that would alter the tone of the work for personal preference, or that wouldn't fit the mood you're trying to get, again feel free to ask them for an explanation, and if you still don't like it, don't listen! Not everybody is going to like every work or every stylistic choice you make.

And a "don't":

~ Don't expect people to do basic proofreading of your work (horribly misspelled words that show up as red and Spell Check would easily catch). Run it through spelling and grammar check before posting it. If your computer doesn't have such a check, look above your text books at the top right. You'll find a spell check button that in some cases can be better than the computer's spell-check. (I'm going to put in a small note here: If the words you are pointing out don't show up on spell-check, Please don't give the writer a hard time about it. Point those mistakes out, but please don't rag on them for it. They might not know the spelling is wrong. Happens more often than you think and even writers who are good might not know they made a spelling mistake)

*

This work is completely wonderful. Maybe put it in the Knowledge Base?

EDIT: Just a little note about the second "don't": Sometimes long reviews aren't the best. Always take reviews with a grain of salt if you're really not agreeing.

I'm really, really glad soemone finally has said, "MAN UP, people." Why couldn't you have made this thread earlier? haha.

knowledge base?