The Angel's Lullaby

Edit: I figured out the notes to this on the piano so that's what the parenthesis with letters are after each line. Pretty much every syllable changes notes. Middle C position on piano. These are notes not chords. I no nothing about chords. PM me if you have questions.

(slow)
Guardian Angel (GECAG)
I’ve put her down to rest (FEEDCD)
Watch over my lover (GGECAG)
For she is close to the end (FEFEDCD)
If you don’t protect her (GGECAG)
My love will surely die (FEEDCD)
Guardian Angel (GECAG)
Sing to her my lullaby (EFECDBC, B is below middle C)
_____

-Guitar-
_____

(slow retard)
Guardian Angel (rep. continuously) (GECAG)
As I lay thee down to sleep (CEEGAGG)
Fourteen angels watch do keep (EEFFEDCD)
_____

-Guitar-
_____

(fast)
Can you see the sun? (CCDEF)
Beneath the clouds (EDCD)
Can you see the moon? (CCDED)
Behind their eyes (CACC)
Can you hear the angels calling? (CCCCDEDC)
The melody forming (CDDEDC)
_____

They’ll bring protection (CCCDE)
To you dear (DCA)
They’ll show you (ACD)
How to live in peace (EFECD)
You can’t believe (CDED)
The good they’ll do (CACG, G is below middle C)
_____

My lullaby is growing (EDCDCDE)
Guardian Angel sing (CCCECG, FE fall from the G)
My lover is dying (ECDCDE)
Guardian Angel (CCCEC)
Help me (GE)
Watch over my lover (CDEDCE)
She needs your song to sing (EDCDCE, DC fall from last E)
_____

-Guitar-
_____

(Slow retard)
Guardian Angel (rep. continuously) (GECAG)
My soul to you I keep (CCCECG)
Rest in peace (x3) (CCD)
_____

-Guitar-
_____

(faster)
My lullaby (GEGE)
Is growing weak (DACC)
Make me stronger (ECFF)
Make me see (ECD)
_____

My lover (ECF)
Is growing weak (EDCD)
Help her, or she will die (GEDECD)
Don’t take my heart (GGGG)
Away from me (EDEC)
Guardian Angel (CCCEC)
Help me... (FG...)
_____

Guardian Angel (GECAG)
I’ve put her down to rest (FEEDCD)
Watch over my lover (GGECAG)
For she is close to the end (FEFEDCD)
If you don’t protect her (GGECAG)
My love will surely die (FEEDCD)
Guardian Angel (GECAG)
Sing to her my lullaby (EFECDBC, B is below middle C)
_____

(Slow retard)
Guardian Angel (rep. continuously) (GECAG)
As I lay thee down to sleep (CEEGAGG)
Fourteen angels watch do keep (EEFFEDCD)
My soul to you I keep (CCCEGG)
Rest in peace (x3) (CCD)

I WOULD GIVE YOU 5 OUT OF 5 STARS FOR THIS. REALLY I WOULD, I AM USUALLY HARD ON LYRICS, BUT YOU WERE GREAT! I LIKE THE THEME, IDEA, DESCRIPTION, AND RHYMING. THIS WOULD BE A VERY GOOD AS A COUNTRY SONG, WITH A FEMALE DOING VOCALS. I WILL GIVE YOU A STAR!

Thank you very much

omg i love it! it's kinda funny 'cause I'm reading a book about Guardian angles called Kissed by an Angle. Maybe you read it? it's a good book so far.

Oh, I see, that you are talented. It is the second your song, which I read. It will be sad song, but beautiful, I think. It is good song to sing in the evenings! All in all, I like two your songs.
So, write more, if you have talent.

It is very interesting. I haven't really got anything new to add in the way of criticism, but I am curious about the fourteen angels. What was your inspiration? Why fourteen?

There's a song I sang from some musical I think back in elementary school and the only lines I remember are 'As I lay thee down to sleep, fourteen angels watch do keep, two are on my right hand.'
I really like it, and thought it fit so I stuck it in there.

i think the whole idea to the song is very interesting and it sets itself apart from mainstream music.
the idea of you singing a song, or praying to your guardian angel to watch over your lover. thats great
the lyrics are simple and beautiful. it is a lullaby : )

"Guardian Angel (rep. continuously)
As I lay thee down to sleep
Fourteen angels watch do keep"

that part seemed really poetic, which makes me unsure of it fitting with the rest as a song. i would have to hear it with its tune. lyrics dont usually rhyme...

"(faster)
My lullaby
Is growing weak
Make me stronger
Make me see

My lover
Is growing weak
Help her, or she will die
Don’t take my heart
Away from me
Guardian Angel
Help me"

That part is absolutely beautiful. i applaud you



"Guardian Angel (rep. continuously)
As I lay thee down to sleep
Fourteen angels watch do keep
My soul to you I keep
Rest in peace (x3)

-this part seems a little out of place. its really rhymey. i dont think it works well
you are repeating the word keep, write another line after the first keep

Thanks for all of the reviews! I've edited this. None of the lyrics have changed, I've just added in the notes so if your curious to how it sounds you can play it on the piano or other instruments in the same key.
This is kind of an experiment. If all goes well I want to do this with all the songs I've written. If you have any suggestions as you how I can make this less confusing-looking if you think it is, just PM me.
Thanks much!

-Carly