Killing Spree (Death Metal)

Did you ever think in the first place
How much God has for you grace?
Then bets get a fold
Your problem is solved
Then at court the judge will scream, guilty!

How much time can you get away with it?
Got not much time just a little bit
Bring disgrace dirty maggot!
Then you call all of us, faggot!

Can you hear the cops?
Can you hear any noise?
Hanging out with the chicks
Got kicked out of school, pricks!

Just another new, crime scene!
Is just revenge? Or is cruelty?
Just another new, crime scene!
Is it anger? Or is it just hunger?

Hey little kid stick the gun to his face
But before doing that, think of all the disgrace
Try to rob the store
Shoot the hearts core
Then at court the judge will scream, guilty!

Build another gang and say that you are cool!
But seems like justice will still rule!
Starts shooting each other then blame that cop!
Can’t you hear your senses roaring stop!


Can you hear the cops?
Can you hear any noise?
Hanging out with the chicks
Got kicked out of school, pricks!

Just another new, crime scene!
Is just revenge? Or is cruelty?
Just another new, crime scene!
Is it anger? Or is it just hunger?

(Guitar Solo)


Hiding in your mined all your sacred fears
Thinking were you will be in the next five years
You can’t hide in your mama's house for long
The cops will break the doors; your mama is not that strong
Oh no please don’t go on….

Killing spree! X4

Please don’t go on….

Killing spree! X4 (stretched)

Just another new, crime scene!
Is just revenge? Or is cruelty?
Just another new, crime scene!
Is it anger? Or is it just hunger? (stretched)

lordgluzman wrote:Then you call all of us all, faggot!

This line didn't flow for me at all. And that last word...I know you're were trying to rhyme and it's Death Metal, but that's a pretty derogatory term....

lordgluzman wrote:Hey little kid stick the gun to his face
But before doing that, think of all the disgrace
Try to rob the store
Shoot the hearts core
Then at court the judge will scream, guilty!

I liked this part. It flowed really well and I just liked it. Can't really explain why

lordgluzman wrote:Build another gang and say that you are cool!
But seems like justice will still rule!
Starts shooting each other then blame that cop!
Can’t you hear your senses are roaring stop!

I really liked this stanza until the last line. I felt like you were trying too hard to follow your AABB rhyme scheme and I thought that last line was kind of weak and didn't flow as well.

This wasn't my favorite of the songs of yours I've read. I don't know. I didn't flow as well for me, I couldn't hear the song in my head as I read it. The topic was good and interesting, and I thought some lines really portrayed it well, but others were more weak. I think you got a little too caught up in the rhyme scheme. Remember, songs don't have to rhyme, and they don't always have to follow the same rhyme scheme all the way throughout.

-Carly

thanks, I changed some of the lines!