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I opened my eyes slowly, squinting as the morning sun shined through the window. This place I was in was unfamiliar. The room had pale yellow walls with beige carpeting. The table next to me held a bouquet of yellow tulips.
I swung my legs out from under the white sheets and tried to stand up, my legs failed miserably as I fell back onto the bed in a heap. I suddenly remembered what had happened the night before. The thought was unbearable. The worst night of my life, yet the one that I could never forget.
I had told my mom I was HIV positive. I decided I should tell her now instead of later when it could be much worse. Eventually the guilt would well up inside me and I would burst
The whole night came back to me, I had come back from the doctor. I wasn't sure if I was infected, but I had to be sure. I went to the doctor and took a test awhile ago. It proved negative but I would have to go back in three months. Three months later that test had proved positive.
I thought back to that night when I got home, I was extremely terrified. A million thoughts were going through my head when I saw my mother sitting on the couch with perfect poise. She stood up, "Carlie, where have you been?" She had asked. My heart started beating and my face felt hot, "I have AIDS," I blurted. Her eyes widened, "You're lying," She hissed. "No, mom, I had sex with Randy, unprotected sex." I said. Her eyes turned evil as she stepped towards me. She began rambling about how dangerous it was to do that, how horrible and sinful it was to not wait until marriage.
Of course, being a girl who always had to protect herself I screamed back at her, random things I couldn't even remember. I remembered feeling dizzy, my vision blurred as I collapsed like a pile of bricks onto the floor. Now I was here, St. Jude's hospital.
They had given me medicine to take everyday, I didn't believe I had collapsed from the HIV more from stress or anxiety.
I let a tear fall down my cheek as my best friend Chase Aaron strode into the room. He was a jock on the football team. People usually think he's perfect but they don't know him like I do. He somehow managed to remain good at football even though he smoked. He was underage at only sixteen like me. God only knows how he got the cigarettes. He also fought with his dad a lot, they were always at each others throats. "Hey Car, you're finally awake," he said happily, his bright blue eyes were shining brightly.
"Yeah," I sighed, and brushed the tear away.
"I can't believe what happened, your mom told me everything," he stated, grabbing a chair and pulling it next to the bed. "I'm going to kill Randy." He brushed his brown hair out of his eyes.
I thought of Randy. I had broken up with him after my first test, but I still loved him. There was always that fire blazing in my heart for him, always calling for more heat. But I knew I couldn't go back to him yet I always found myself wanting to. He was always so sweet and I don't know why I slept with him. He told me it would prove to him I loved him. I wondered why he couldn't just believe I loved him when I told him I did. It wasn't enough for him, nothing was ever enough.
"No Chase, don't," I pleaded.
"Why are you always defending him?" He asked, "He's trash Carlie, look what he did to you, this isn't something that will go away. It will last forever."
"I know," I said sadly, questioning my own motives for defending Randy. I knew he didn't deserve it.
"Sorry, Car, I shouldn't have snapped like that," he said tucking a stray stand of red hair behind my ear.
"It's okay C," I said.
"Well, I'll let you rest," he said hugging me tightly. The smell of smoke and sweet cologne filled my nose, a smell most people would hate, but one I loved the most.
"Okay bye Chase," I sighed.
He left the room and I let the sobs escape my lips.
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Okay so please comment because I want to improve. Please only constructive criticism
