Christmas Wishes

I am not exactly what one would cal an "experienced Writer" so please, PLEASE don't expect to much. And I know it's not much, but it's an intro.


Christmas wishes

Hoping to me a slightly funny story, but not so funny that one would scrawl “hilarious” on the back, so people would actually be expecting something.




For most average nine-year olds, Christmas is the highlight of the year. For the small price of strange relatives pinching your cheeks, one could receive numerous presents .(< Need to insert another happy detail on xmas )>To top it all off, there was a grand feast, where mothers and aunts alike would spend hours preparing, only to have a crabby grandfather who seemed to have forgotten his medication, complain about it.

It was a wonderful time, full of smiles and rosy cheeks. Full of thank-yous and Yorkshire puddings. Full of ugly parkas and handmade sweaters one would rather die than wear. I mean, come on Grandma. Do you really think I'm going to march into school with the words “I love grandma” blazing on my chest?

Comments,questions, advice, would be appreciated.

It's supposed to be from a nine-year old's point of view. An intelligent, well-read nine year old, but still, only a nine year old. So, please understand that the vocabulary will not be very big. And the story will be told through a nine year old's point of view.
If anyone as any suggestions, ideas, comments, questions, advice, constructive criticism, just plain old criticism, it will all be gladly appreciated.

When we were young (like 9) we all had creative imaginations. Well in this story i would find it good to put in creative thoughts about the christmas time and how she feels and looks at it all from the eyes to the feel to the smell. Younger kids always go into details without knowing it and it brings out not only character to them but also an interest to the sotry so find ways to be shure to mention the nine year olds thoughts and sences about every little thing going on.

Blackman is right. Very, very right.

For most average nine-year olds, Christmas is the highlight of the year.

It's supposed to be from a nine-year old's point of view.

Huh? If you are telling this from a nine-year old's point of view in first person, you don't need that first sentence. It could be, For most kids my age or something.
If it's not in first person, the line is okay.

thanks guys ! I'm working on a second, (much longer) piece to go along with this.I will definitely try to remember all you've said.