Under you

And then I slow down

Remember to breathe when you're not around

Remember to stay on course with solid ground

To stay in the light so I can be found

I've lost so much

Through what I thought I regained

All the possessions and wherabouts

of Places with no name

All the Tigers I refused to tame



And in a moment of open eyes

I see something new

The way night dies

Under you









under you I'm warm

Under you I'm seen only infrared

under you my hearts a swarm

Under you I hear everything being said

This is like a song, I think. Very well contained and vivid.
I like how the first line starts with "And", hinting at what happened before (a constrast to the slowness).

Wow your rhyming is great. Nothing tacky or forced here. I love "of places with no name, all the tigers I regused to tame", that's just lovely.

The only problem I could see was:

"under you my hearts a swarm" -> you missed the apostrophe. heart's.

Hey there, before I get into praising your poem I will first highlight a few things that snagged me:

1.)under you my heart's a swarm -> apostrophes help us to verify ownership

2.)
I've lost so much



Through what I thought I regained



All the possessions and wherabouts



of Places with no name



All the Tigers I refused to tame

I was wondering if you ever thought of starting that as a new stanza, it helps to maintain the four-line-stanza rhythm

3.).... truly an excellent poem, very earthy rhyming absolutely nothing is forced or jars against anything else. Truly reflects the mood of the poet.

GL and congratulations on a phenominal piece.

I really enjoyed the use of imagery in this piece.
I like the way you almost use the words in a way which gives it such a song like quality.
The empathy use also gives a brief tone of itself throughout.

But I have to say you need that little bit more use of punctuation to give it that little boost.

Other than that I enjoyed immensely.