My Heart

I'm sorry if this sucks, it's just one of those time-to-go-to-bed-wait-oh-my-God-I-forgot-to-write-my-poem! things...
I just want to see what people think about it.

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I have found my heart,
Inside these walls of hardships,
My heart overcomes.

You have the form right, but something seems lacking. What I love about haikus is the way they can pack so much meaning into something so short. I can tell that there's meaning behind this, but it is confused and lacks impact: for example, if your heart is inside walls of hardship, what does it overcome? The visuals don't work for me, as I'm too busy trying to see a heart both inside and outside of metaphorical walls, if you see what I mean. You might want to tidy that up a bit, try to present one coherent image to make the piece stronger.

Just my two cents

Cheers,
~bubbles

I agree. I love haikus, they're my absolute favorite (well, besides freeform) but this one is kind of hard to make sense of. Keep trying!

This was nice, I did like it and I know haiku's are suppose to be in the form that you have created. But it was a little bland and you didn't have much to say in it.

I agree, many haiku's have a lot of stuff like description packed into them, but yours doesn't seem to have much.

And I found it hard to make sense of it also. But that's just me.

Keep writing!!

Ellie.

Hello Abocreature

This is good to be a last minute thing. I agree that it is a bit lacking, I see there is meaning behind it, but I am not sure what. I can't get an image of it in my head, so trying working on that.

Good luck!

~Mateeah

Well, I'm not a very big fan of haikus, but in your 'rush' I think this was very well thought out, lacks a bit of meaning though (In my view), but it was good.