Here's a little clue of what to do, if your son's best mate is Vanessa.
If he likes to dance, swaps horror for romance,
And applies for work ex as a hairdresser.
Parent's don't be alarmed, your childs not yet harmed, but there's something I have to say.
You know Tad? Your strapping lad?
Well I'm afraid he's becoming gay.
Now I know it's a shock, but just hide that frock and follow each step of my guide.
Don't ask him outright, you'll give him a fright,
And tempt him to reveal and not hide.
First let him sniff glue, get a football tattoo and rebel as much as he can.
Cuz if you set laws, he'll have on your draw's,
Then you'll be raising a bitch not a man.
Ban watching of soaps, tell racist jokes and watch out for developing lisps.
Buy him lesbian porn, pray it gives him the horn,
In turn this will strenghten limp wrists.
This may all seem extreme, but to prevent a queen, nothing is to big of a chore.
Make sure he drinks pints, steer him into street fights,
Though you'll have to scrape his ass off the floor.
Well my advice is through, this is all I can do, there's no number if you need more help.
But if before meals, he wants to express how he feels,
Beware! This kids coming out!
Now he's lifted the lid, forget that grandkid, but watch your heart, deep breath and relax.
As an after-thought, there's one last resort,
Do you remember what you did with that axe?
Yo please don't kick me off this site, I'm jus playin.
