The Black Cobra: Chapter 1

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Thank you so much Amelia, I love getting detailed crits because when I re-read the chapter so many times I start missing some important things.

I'm starting to notice I describe things unnecessarily, and it's starting to bug me. I'll have to fix that as I keep writing.




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I'm curious to see how this works out. Please update soon. You have a good sense of diction and I like that.
"Anyone can where a mask but the importance of everyone around them is to see the person beneath the mask, underneath the skin and into the heart."



shady and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws
— Atticus