MS Gundam Unity

Duo looked from Quatre to Trowa. "Well, I guess." He took out a tool kit and opened Deathscythe's cockpit. He was more objective than Quatre, but more emotional than Trowa. Heck, a Gundam was more emotional than Trowa.

Heero wasn't thinking.He sighted and blew another Suit away. Action and reaction made up his code.

"Wing Zero, we have another Suit on scope. Hold your fire."

"Roger that," Heero replied.

I was in the mess hall when I heard the news. "Lieutenant Sora, come up front."

"Sir," I said around a mouthful of soggy granola. I practically lived on it these days.

"Your Suit is ready. Command says that you should test it. There will be no martail action as of yet."

No martial action? I thought. The Unity is a weapon! All I said was, "Sir," like a good sodier should.

Piloting her wasn't your usual push-a-sud, fire-the-gun action. It required thought. I pushed myself, as well as Unity, and finished well under time.

"Good job, Lieutenant Sora." I blinked. Who's talking?

"Hello, Sora! This is the Unity."

"Stop playing tricks," I muttered.

Suddenly a siren blared in my ear. "This is not a drill! Please respond!"

My eyes widened. "Unity?"

"I bleive the correct response is 'No, duh.'"

"That's all I need: a Mobile Suit with a sense of humor."

"I heard that, lieutenant."

This time, I laughed.

In general, this needs to be extended, you need to add more description, more action, more plot, more everything before I can give you a propper critique. One piece of advice I can offer though is to lose some of the characters. You're trying to introduce too many at once and it clutters the text and doesn't give the reader a chance to get attatched to anyone. Also, you had a few typos -

Heero wasn't thinking.He sighted and blew another Suit away. [You need a space between thinking and He.]

There will be no [s]martail[/s] martial action as of yet."

{i}The Unity is a weapon!{/i} [Italics are done with plain brackets like [i]]

Overall, I thought what you had so far wasn't too bad but write more and then I'll give a fair judgement.

Okay, here's an edit.

Duo looked from Quatre to me. "I just don't get it. Do you talk to your Suit?"

"Sure," I replied.

"Whatever," Duo said and went back to work.

I grinned. "Quatre, you talk to Sandrock all the time, right?"

"Yep," he replied.

I gave him a quick look. "Listen, I think there's something off about Unity. I don't know; it's just a feeling."

"A feeling? Gundam pilots need more than that."

"Well, we both assume our Gundam is a living personality."

"Caught," he said with a grin.

A siren went off. "All pilots, report to the Briefing Room. I repeat, all pilots!"

We grabbed our uniforms and hastily donnned them. Duo swore, "Rats, now I can't finish in time."

"Scythe is fine, Duo. Come on!" I called.

Grumbling, he complied. We all entered the Briefing Room and saluted. I wondered if Unity was about to see her share of action.

"Take your seats, pilots."

I dropped onto the nearest chair. I had a bad feeling about this meeting.

"EarthSphere stole a move on us," the general began, and my alarm shot up."Several Suits, disguised as cargo, infiltrated Colony 197. Do not, under any circumstances, destroy civilian life.Herd them all to the hangers if you must. There should be room."

Everyone, from the cadets to Duo, gasped. We exchanged quick looks. "This is big," I mouthed.

"Sora, pay attention!"

"I'd better. X-18-9997 is my home."

A few notes. One: Quatre is pronounced "Ca tra."

Two: This takes place before Endless Waltz, about January of After Colony 196.