Finding Exactly What You Need

Grace sat at her computer, the blank screen staring up at her. She sighed, and began playing with the pen on her desk, rolling it up and down and doodlling on a piece of paper she had ripped out of her diary.

Grace had experienced days like this. The days where no inspiration came to her and she spent hours upon hours just staring at a blank computer screen.

This was the reason her parents didn't want Grace to become a writer. 'You'll waste away in front of that computer,' they said when Grace told them. Grace had never believed them, until now.

inally, Grace placed her fingers on the keyboard and started typing. She typed for 20 minutes, and then read over what she had written. It was horrible, a poem about a killer computer. Grace was disgusted with herself for writing something so stupid.

Grace stood up. She wrapped her coat around herself and ventured out of her flat, for inspiration. Everywhere she looked, Grace thouight of a hundred new ideas. Smiling, she sat on a park bench and began to write in her little notebook. After writing a page, Grace looked over the words. It was horrible, a short piece about the mind of an ant. She tore out the piece of paper and scrunched it up.

'Maybe I'm not meant to be a writer,' she thought in the end. The breeze nipped at her as she walked back to her flat. She sat down in front of the computer and began to write. She wrote for a long time, and then read over her work, smiling.

Writers block. Can it get any worse? Is there a medication for writers block? I have experienced many days where whenever I put something down on paper, it sound horrible. But don't chuck out that poem about the killer computers, or that piece about the mind of an ant. You never know, they could become inspiration for the most amazing composition ever written...

This kind of sounds like an ad against drunk driving or something...you know...the ones where they tell the story about how, "Mary had never been to a party before. She didn't realize that it would be her last..." okay, not so morbid, but you get the point. Is that what you were going for? Because it's okay if you were.

I will also add that the last part, when Grace has the wind on her face, is confusing. At least it was for me because I didn't realize she was outside. Perhaps you could mention that at the beginning.

I'm not sure exactly what you're going for with this, but writer's block is a classic topic we can all relate to.

rolling it up and down and doodlling on a piece of paper she had ripped out of her diary.

You can improve the flow of this by replacing the 'and' with a comma and taking out the word 'had'.

'You'll waste away in front of that computer,'

If this is supposed to be dialouge (normally flashback phrases aren't exactly that...), then it's fine. But if it isn't supposed to be viewed as dialouge, then you should move the comma to be after the second ' thingy.

inally, Grace placed her fingers on the keyboard and started typing.

Capatalize Initially

Grace stood up. She wrapped her coat around herself and ventured out of her flat, for inspiration.

Nix the comma.

'Maybe I'm not meant to be a writer,' she thought in the end.

Same thing as before =D. Or, this really cool thing soe writers do (I'm not sure if it's arule per-say) is they put thoughts in italics. You can consider that =D

_______________________________________________
This was typical bored writer with nothing to write about material. Not to say it was bad. It can be polished up a bit, but it's not really anything more than boredom...and that's how it came across, like you wanted the reader to be bored. Fortunently, we're all writers here, so we can relate to your character, anybody else would probably find it rather dull. The writing's good though.

-JC

Well, JC kinda beat me to it. But she did miss a few things.

inally, Grace placed her fingers on the keyboard and started typing.

I think you mean Finally.

Also, you said "Grace" waaaaaaay too many times. Replace a few of them with pronouns. They're your friend.

-St. Razorblade

Ah yes! I'm going to expand on what razorblade said, (I was supposed to put it in mine, but I forgot :O)

The fun thing about third person is that you get to see everybody from an outside, mostly unbiased opinion. You got that, I'm sure. But the trick to such technique, is balancing names vs. pronouns. Grace vs. She.

I'm sure you can replace the majority of the Grace's in here with she. Seeing as 'she' is your main character and we don't get the confuzing dialouge who's talking thing.

Basically what I'm trying to say is...In third person, the key is to only say the name when your reader may be confused about who your talking about. If there's more than one person in the scene, or if it's dialouge. This is just a rule-of-thumb-thing, and as you get more comfortable using it you can mix it up a bit, but it works. Trust me =D

Still, good work though!

-JC