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tatteredbones <333 that seems to be dysphoria and as far as I know it doesn't have to be but can be gender related
2 hours ago
Ari11 Yeah idk. It's kinda like when you're having art block and you try to draw something but it just looks wrong. Like there's nothing necessarily wonky about it but it just doesn't seem correct.
2 hours ago
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I uh asked a family member who I wasn't out to if I looked girly in my skirt outfit ( I was going for unafraid male rockstar vibes- like nirvana type deal) and he said yes I looked very girly. T.T
I don't know what I was expecting but my heart is broken ahhh
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My mom said the most earthshattering thing ever today. She said, "I was hoping for a girl" and... yeah, so was I. It's such a weird feeling because I can't communicate that with her. Oopsie! :')
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severely underestimated the power of cosplay when it comes to gender euphoria until i tried a cosplay that effectively hid my chest. im just like wow. that's me! i like that!
(of course the cosplay involved dressing like a stereotypical dad but shhh)
Mageheart ...now once again wondering if i should try wearing a binder sometime
Mar 16, 2023
Seirre if you're considering it and you're able to get one, I would strongly suggest it! sometimes you don't realize you're experiencing dysphoria until you correct it and the euphoria hits and you're like WHOAH, alrighty then. and it's a fantastic feeling.
Mar 16, 2023
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i like how ive just casually accepted my gender identity is funky. i was driving home the other day and suddenly found myself thinking how "i could never see myself as a Mom but i could see myself as a Pear" and was just like *sighs* mage cis people don't think that
in other news, suddenly realized that when i have kids someday ill be their pear so. that's a thing
BluesClues omg you'll be their pear <3
also love that gender of the day is "funky"
Mar 16, 2023
Mageheart yup!! definitely wouldn't have been as fond of the term without pear in cute mutants <333
(also had my cute mutant self insert oc be the pear of their eldritch rat children so. definitely warmed me up to the term being compared to me)
and yeees im loving it a lot too now that ive worded it that way fhfh
Mar 16, 2023
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Aasfjkasfjsafh I've finally found someone whom I view as more then a friend.
We've beenfliritingtalking with each other for more then a year now, and after several heart-to-hearts I finally confessed how I felt about her and she accepted it completely which made me so happy aasdfajksfjashf.
I'm really hoping our friendship can be something more.
She has an extraordinary amount of patience and tolerence , she's always tried to support me and asfjhasjfdh she's just someone I want a more intimate connection with.
But at the same time I don't know if a relationship with her would be good for me.
We're on completely different levels when it comes to emotional intelligence. I'm pretty adept at analyzing and communicating deep feelings she's...not. She's more of a fix-problems-with-humor type of person.
And we do have a lot in common, maybe too much in common, and we generally see eye to eye on things which is amazing, but I don't think it'd make for a healthy relationship.
So liiike I don't wanna rush into it. But I'm just so happy that she accepted my feelings for her asfasjfhaskjdfh.
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I came out to my close friends and family a few weeks ago as trans. I’m working with my psychiatrist to stable my mood so I can start blockers and last weekend my mother and I finally decided my new name would be Nova. (A name meaning and being associated with hope - hence comes the username.)
Stringbean I'm so glad she's working with you on this! <33
Mar 16, 2023
tatteredbones <33333333
4 hours ago
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Sharing this here because I've been lowkey stressing over gender identity recently because nothing seems right, and then I read this Twitter thread about gender detachment and went quietly oh: gender detachment
Mageheart oh
Mar 2, 2023
JoyDark That’s so interesting! I’ve felt female or feminine my whole life, but I don’t necessarily like being perceived as female. Like, I have a gender (female) but I don’t really feel like I want or need the gender. If that makes sense. That’s extremely interesting that feelings about gender like that may be shared, and that it might be a way to cope in a patriarchal world.
Mar 3, 2023
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Oh yeah! I made just aro/ just ace cards too! I, uh, don’t know how to attach multiple images so I’m gonna do em both separately
(1/2)
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Stringbean you the bestest bro :3 <3333
Mar 16, 2023
tatteredbones <33333333333333
4 hours ago
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I'm doing some research and general worldbuilding. If you aren't cisgender (or think you might not be) and you don't mind engaging in a mental exercise, I could use your perspective. If you're willing but don't wish to reply to this post, you're absolutely free to send me a PM instead.
Imagine a place called Sciland in the year 2XXX. Freedom of choice is universal: you love whom you please, you dress how you please, and you work, live, and do as you please. (Antisocial behaviour like theft and murder is still forbidden.) Biological sex is obviously still recognised and distinguished, but gender and gender roles have been eliminated from the collective consciousness, since there are no prescriptions or expectations on how you should act based on your sex. The Scilandian language uses the same third-person singular pronoun for each individual.
Here is where your perspective is required. Imagine you were born and raised in Sciland. (1) Would you still identify as trans, and if so, (2) is this because your biological sex feels incorrect? In other words, your body, not societal expectations — which no longer exist — influences your decision? If you do still identify as trans but not because of your body, (3) why is that, then, (4) and how would you prefer to be accommodated, assuming Scilandian society doesn't do everything right already?
I hope at least a few of you would be willing to respond, as your perspectives could certainly be helpful.
Note: I shouldn't have to say this, but just so it is said, please, don't try to explain the definition of gender, gender roles, gender expression, or what it means to be cis or trans to me. I'm already aware. Thank you.
Feltrix I'm not sure if my answers will be helpful given my personal view on all these things, so feel free to ignore me. For context, I'm nonbinary, but I'm amab and masculine terms don't really make me uncomfortable, I just like to have gender neutral terms and they/them pronouns used for me at least some of the time (all of the time would also be fine, but I don't mind if there are some he/hims mixed in there). I don't really identify with the label trans, but I'm not sure I really feel cis, either. Sorry that a lot of this is kinda contradictory.
Anyway, Sciland sounds like it already hits 10/10 for me. Most of my discomfort with masculinity come from the perceptions people have of me and the assumptions they make based on that, as well as the boxes it pushes me into. My issues with my body are all pretty minor and I don't think they're really related to gender, but it can be kinda hard to tell.
Feb 24, 2023
BrumalHunter Thank you for your response, Feltrix! I do think it's actually helpful, as you shared your perspective, which gives me additional insight. And I'm glad to hear you approve of Sciland; I would enjoy living there myself!
If I may, it sounds like the "traditional" gender roles are what bother or upset you the most. I've heard more than one nonbinary person say the label gives them the freedom to express themselves in a way that they wouldn't be able to otherwise. In an ideal world, like Sciland, that wouldn't be necessary, but alas, our world is far from ideal. I say this with the hope of offering some insight of my own. Ultimately, it sounds like you've found a solution that works well enough for you.
Again, thanks for answering!
Feb 24, 2023
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Y'all, I have such a story to tell you.
So, this is really two stories that come together.
The first story is a story of self-discovery with my own gender. I believe I posted here last year that I don't think I'm a man and I was exploring what that meant for me. Over the past few months, I've really thought about transitioning to a woman. I just don't know how the process would go but I've been actually considering it. I think deep down I know I'm not a man and I have been testing they/them and non binary but I don't think that's for me. One of the constants for me is what my name would be, and there's one that's been floating around in my mind for a bit, but that's for a different day.
Anyway, here's where the other story comes in.
I've had a crush on this guy ever since I met him, like over a decade ago. He was one of my first friends and we've recently started talking to each other again. We've also been kind of flirting and having heart to hearts but we've decided to be friends for now. I wondered why since I thought it was clear both of us liked each other and, well, we had a conversation last night about it and I found out that they're also trans, and have been wanting to transition for a long time now.
When I was thinking I was a man, I was very sure I was gay and was only attracted to men. But, since exploring my own gender expression and the binary, things have become... well, it's become more nebulous for me.
Ever since that conversation last night, I've just been thinking about what it would be like for us to transition together and what that experience would be like. And what it would be like if we were together together. I don't know, in my head it just feels like it would be a genuine bonding experience and would bring us closer together.
I don't know what the future holds, for me or in general, but I don't think I've felt this way in a long long time. Genuine butterflies, and one of the first times in awhile that I've thought about the future without anxiety.
BluesClues <333
Feb 19, 2023
3 hours ago
So I don't know if this is a gender identity thing or what but whenever I look in the mirror I don't look...right. Like, I don't know what I was expecting but it wasn't this. Y'know?