Young Writers Society

Hi LZPianoGirl!
It's GirlWithATypeWriter here for a review!
Right off the bat, I loved the way you started the poem. The "I am Great Britain", "I am America" in bold sets the mood of the entire work. Also, I think it's great that you and @KaPo21 have chosen to write about a historical event and the fact that you guys have made it a poem is really appreciable because as a writer I think it's a challenging topic to write on. I like how you've connected the entire poem by juxtaposing the struggles of the two countries although quite different, the pain seems to be the same.
The best part about your poem is the last two lines of each stanza which goes:

"I hope we never fail.

I am Great Britain."

"I hope to stay standing through every fight

I am America"

These lines finish the poem on a really solemn note filled with emotions as they so beautifully put forth their respective goals of solicitude and survival.

Overall, great poem and I hope to see more from you.

Happy writing!

XOXO

Hey LZPianoGirl & KaPo21! The lines which you choose for your poem are a very strong and emotional one. I really appreciate you both guys that you have written very well about the Revolutionary War. Each line stresses the reader to feel about this poem. Your presentation is awesome.

Hi, @LZPianoGirl and @KaPo21! I saw this poem lurking in the Green Room and thought I'd give you both a hand by helping to get it out.

I think the strongest part of this poem is its juxtaposition. I love how the formatting of the Great Britain and America sections mirror each other, while also having a few minute differences. I don't know if this was part of the school assignment, but your decision to have one person write for each country was a great choice. It gave each section a distinctively different feel, and also allowed both of you to focus on the mindset of each country.

I especially liked the America section. The progression from human to soldier to finally America as a whole resonated with everything I've learned about the American Revolution over the years. The struggles @KaPo21 were ones I would have written about if I was doing this assignment. Overall, I found that section to be a very patriotic one.

I also liked the conflict in the Great Britain section. While they were obviously the enemy in the Revolutionary War, war is never clear cut. People fight with all kinds of motivations, and I think the Great Britain section captured that. I also like how Great Britain stayed as Great Britain; though it shows unity, it also shows a lack of humanity. It's a cool way to format the poem.

Overall, great job on this! I really liked reading it.

Hi! I just want to say, I hope this went good for you at school, and this seems so cool! I like the second part and especially the way it changed from 'I am a human being' to 'I am American' whereas with Great Britain it just stayed 'I am Great Britain'. This is really good. Uh... I think that's about it from me! Again, really cool!