Hello! MJ stopping by for a short review
There were so many grammar mistakes, so I'm not going to take the time to nitpick them. Suffice to say that there were missing letters, poor grammar, bad punctuation, and just a whole slew of mistakes that make this hard to read and disinteresting. It takes more work than it should just to get through a paragraph, and that made it feel very rough, choppy, and it gives the implication that you didn't care enough about your work to make it polished and better-looking.
I agree with your other two reviewers; there was no context given for the Muslim faith. The best format for an argumentative essay, in my opinion and in the opinion of many other English teachers and scholars, is to have an introductory paragraph that will highlight the points you plan to hit during your review. Then, you discuss those points and prove the thesis you argued in your introduction. Then, you summarize all your points in your conclusion. This article had no such structure, or even any structure at all.
And as my final note, I couldn't really see your argument here. It felt incomplete, ending on something that did not summarize, and you didn't get to argue all three rules. This was the very basic outline of your essay. You had your proofs for the ponits you were going to argue, but this needs a lot of polishing and work to make it a finished piece.
Hopefully this review was helpful, and if you have any questions, my PM box is always open! Good luck with this, and I'll be around to help you out if you have any other questions, along with people with names in light green, dark green, and red.
Best wishes,
MJ
Points: 31500
Reviews: 561
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