The snow falls soft on frosted panes, A whispered hush, a gentle rain. The firelight dances, warm and bright, Reflecting love in candlelight.
Your hand in mine, a perfect fit, A Christmas kiss, a tender bit Of joy and peace, a whispered vow, Beneath the mistletoe's soft bough.
The carols play, a sweet refrain, Of hope and love, again, again. The scent of pine, a spicy blend, With love's sweet fragrance, without end.
This Christmas morn, a blessed day, With you beside me, come what may. My heart's true north, my guiding star, My love, my life, no matter how far.
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Canary word: Present
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,742 Reviews
Hi, it's Vera!
Firstly, I love the whole Christmas theme you have going here. It reminds me of the fire and ice thing. I know it's short but it's good words chosen to use. It's cute, savory, shot, and sweet! There's no other way to describe it. You present love to be an eternal thing (meaning forever). You describe it as warm and just to have winter in the background of you and your person. I like that you don't take attention away from the winter, it's the perfect balance.
Heya! AnotherCrowInRow is here with a quick review for your poem! ^^
I love how the whole poem perfectly works with the atmosphere of Christmas, coziness and coziness - from the very beginning I feel as if it is palpable in every verse! I really like how, especially in the first half of the poem, you primarily use epithets, which, however, are chosen very well because they perfectly build an idea of what your poem is actually about!
In this poem, you use a peculiar formatting: it seems a bit unconventional - you combine several potential separate verses into one stanza. On the one hand, it may be original, but at the same time a bit confusing. Especially with verses that start with the word "Of" it really doesn't look that good when reading and it disturbs the flow. Of course, this is just my opinion, and if you want, you can leave your poem as it is, but I also noticed in other reviews that I'm not the only one who found the formatting a little difficult to read.
The flow of the poem is excellent and I really like how the individual lines tie together - although it is true that the individual rhymes would stand out much better if the poem were formatted a little differently.
Have a nice rest of day/night/whatever and stay safe!
- Kay
Hello Sinon! I'm Ranger, here to review your wonderful poetry! While I have not reviewed much poetry before, I hope to do so more and get better at it so let's get into it!
From the very start, I love how soft, warm, and hopeful this piece felt! It perfectly conveyed the happy, cozy feeling that I feel associated with Christmas, winter, and a calm night/morning. It was wonderful both to see how both the feeling and direct environment conveyed at once in the scenery around being built and displayed. I truly felt like I was in the piece, or at the very least, watching it from the window while also feeling the warmth from it. It was very immersive and brought the feelings and points across perfectly.
Going into looking at the formatting, I greatly enjoy how you have some of the lines rhyming while others do not, it gives the poem good variation in my opinion. The only think I can really critique in this piece is exactly how it is formatted. I would have found the piece a bit easier to read if it had been put into the formatting of different lines inside of the different chunks instead of a continuous line that makes up the chunk. However, I also noticed your capitalization in regards to a new section where a new line could be made. I know that sometimes the publishing center can mess up a bit in how the piece was originally formatted though so it very well could have been an error there. This being said, I appreciated the capitalization in being able to differentiate where the parts should be split into different lines. It really helped keep the rhythm of the poem!
Overall, this was an amazing piece to read and you did an amazing job on it! It really gave me a sense of warmth, peacefulness, and coziness, like finding quiet moments when time seems to stand still! I greatly enjoyed reading it and hope you write more splendid pieces like this! Hopefully this review was helpful to you and have a wonderful rest of your day/night.
Farewell for now!
-Ranger
Hi Sinon. Valkyria here to leave a review for your work. Let's get into it:
This was very beautiful to read. Your imagery is strong, and the language is very effective in providing the themes of the poem. The first stanza provides a clear sketch of not only what is happening, but the feelings associated with it. The imagery of the snow falling, the fire, and the rain reflect the romantic, calm, and gentle vibes of the narrator and their partner.
I also wanted to point out the structure of the poem. It reads almost like prose considering how long the first line of each stanza is, but I think it works well here. Each stanza is consistent with how they're structured. It also rhymes very well, and the flow of the poem is easy to follow when I say it aloud. The capitalized words after the commas kind of throw me off a little because of where they're placed. If the rest of the poem follows the proper grammar and punctuation, that should stay consistent. Maybe that was intentional, so you can take my suggestion with a grain of salt!
It gives me such a cozy feeling. Well done!