Mommy hasn’t been the same since Sammy died.
She was sad when daddy died, but she still tucked us in at night and told us bedtime stories.
She still made dinner for us every night when we came home from school. She still made turkey for Thanksgiving and decorated for Christmas.
But ever since Sammy died last spring, Mommy hasn’t been the same.
Mommy doesn’t tuck me in anymore. She eats ramen noodles and pizza for dinner and barely looks at me when she is eating.
She microwaved a frozen turkey TV dinner for Thanksgiving.
Mommy skipped Christmas altogether. Every year since daddy died, mommy put three stockings up at the fireplace, one for Mommy, one for Sammy, and one for me. But this past Christmas, she didn’t hang any stockings up.
Mommy didn’t come to school for the parent teacher’s conference last week. I think she may have forgotten about it.
Or maybe Mommy's mad at me. Maybe Mommy blames me.
I was the one who was supposed to look both ways. I was the one holding little Sammy’s hand when we crossed the street to get on the school bus.
But that day, I was too excited about our Easter party at school, and I couldn’t wait to get on the school bus to show Ana my Easter basket.
Mommy should be mad at me. It was my fault.
Martha and Candice got out of the car at the cemetery parking lot. Martha shifted the flowers and teddy bear in her arms as she grabbed her purse. Today is the one year anniversary of that day.
They walked towards the South end of the cemetery slowly, oblivious to the drizzling rain.
The clicking of Martha's shoes on the pavement stopped abruptly as they reached their destination. They stepped into the field of grass towards the tombstones. Slowly, they walked down the rows until they saw the one they were looking for.
Lovingly, Martha arranged the flowers and teddy bear in front of the headstone. She ran her fingers lightly over the letters in the greenish gray stone as she read the hand carved epitaph over and over.
Sleep undisturbed
My little Sammy Dec 6, 2008 - Apr 14, 2017
and
My lovely Candice Feb 23, 2005 - Apr 14, 2017
“Sammy and Candice, Mommy loves you,” Martha whispered, her tears blending with the drizzling rain, “and I’m so sorry I couldn’t take you guys to school that day.”
Confused, Candice stepped forward to comfort her mother.
Only then, as her hand passed through her mother’s shoulder, did she notice for the first time the words on the right side of the headstone.
omg this is so sad but i loved it, for a bit i was confused and thought that sammy was the father. but after reading it again it makes more sense, but like ahhhhh i would cry for this story! i really really truly hope that you make so much more this was beautiful work. and keep this up! i love the way everything is described. but i also love the way it ends i love myself some realization endings!!
Hi @Shadows338, RadDog here! Today, I'll be reviewing your short story Why Doesn't Mommy Look At Me?
I really like the concept of the story. It reminds me of something I've read/watched but I can't quite put my finger on it. This was a great story, the twist ending was even better. I would have liked a little more description and character development but I get that's hard with short stories sometimes. Other than that, it was a great piece of writing. Until next time, happy writing!
-RadDog
I really like the concept of this! I admit, the end really got me and I'm had to go back until it registered that they both died. Although I did have one little nitpick about this 
. So when Candice is narrating and says "mommy" to describe her mother and all that I really though she was about seven or eight years old. But when it listed the ages I was kinda confused. It made more sense to me that the Sammy and Candice would be in their younger childhood like around six and eight years old if you know what I mean. Like @niteowl said below, a twelve year old should know better than to not look both ways, you know? That's the only thing for me, otherwise... SUPER COOL CONCEPT! (amazing plot twist at the end by the way)
Hi there Shadows338! Niteowl here to leave a quick review.
Overall, I like the concept of this. While I somewhat saw the twist coming, I wasn't sure until the end. I think you captured the innocent perspective of the "surviving" child pretty well.
However, there were a couple things I found odd:
1) The listed ages are 8 and 12, but I think they might need to be younger to fit the portrayal of Candice and her relationship with Sammy. At eight years old, I think Sammy would know he needs to look both ways, as I had that ingrained into me from the age of 4-5. I also feel like 12 is just a bit too old to have the sort of innocence Candice has here, as I was already on the verge of being a cynical know-it-all teenager at 12. It reads more like she's 8 or 9 at most and Sammy is 5 or 6.
2) I'm not sure switching to the third person is the best way to reveal the twist. It seems like having Candice accompany her mom to the cemetery, feeling guilty all the way, perhaps even trying to beg her mom for forgiveness, would be more emotional.
3) Not sure people get epitaphs like "My little Sammy" and "My lovely Candice". I would expect mainly the name and date, maybe something like "Beloved Son/Daughter". Also, I wonder if they're buried with their father and if so, why there's no mention of his grave.
As a side note, you can change the work type from "Art". I know it displays all funny when you first save the work, but if you go into "Edit work", you can hit "Save Changes" then you'll see an option to "Set options for this work". This will take you back to that window but have it displayed correctly so you can set it as a story.
Overall, this was a solid emotional story. Keep writing! 
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