z

Young Writers Society


12+

I am a Rose

by EsmerayaRose, LiviLove


I am Rose

I wonder will I ever grow

I hear the silent raindrops

From the storm that clouds my mind

I see the darkness that surrounds

Covering my petals in shadows of all kinds

I want to grow

I am alone

~~~~

I pretend that I am the symbol of love

When all love does is break

I feel each lost soul

I know the burden they truly hold

I touch the inner souls of truth

I worry that all is not well

I cry blood-stained tears

That fill the ponds of misery

I am the symbol of death

~~~~~

I understand my thorns

They keep me safe

I say the unsaid

True things shouldn’t just be erased.

I dream about the darkness

It’s my only escape

I try to be precise

I hope to grow

I am a Rose


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Sun Mar 26, 2023 5:13 pm
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AmayaStatham wrote a review...



Hey there!

I just finished reading your poem and I have to say, it's amazing! The emotions are pouring out of every word you wrote. You really have a talent for poetry.

One of my favorite parts of your poem is when you say, "I understand my thorns. They keep me safe." That line really got me because it shows that even though you may have a tough exterior, it's for your own protection. You're not afraid to be who you are, and that's something to be admired.

Another part of your poem that I really loved was when you said, "I say the unsaid. True things shouldn’t just be erased." That's so true! It's important to speak up about the things that matter to you, even if they're uncomfortable or unpopular.

I also love how you use the metaphor of a rose. It's such a beautiful flower, but it also has thorns to protect itself. A rose is both beautiful and strong.

Overall: I think your poem is inspiring and uplifting. You show that even when things are tough, you can still grow and become something amazing. Keep writing! Your words have the power to touch so many people. I loved it!

This poem reminded me of a story I wrote, it's called: Broken mirror image
If you have time, be sure to check it out!

- Rinisha




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Fri Nov 05, 2021 7:48 pm
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GoodieGoat wrote a review...



Hello QueenMadRose and LiviLove I hope this finds you well and you are having a lovely day. I wanted to start by saying this is a marvelous poem. The way it carries itself and portrays its mood are quiet elegant.

From my own reading I have found what I like to thing of as 'emotive elements' that push onward towards the end of the poem which drives home its theme and the parallelism to the speaker as a rose.

In the first stanza I imagine the speaker as a rose lonely and hoping to reach their full potential fighting against the storm within themselves that shrouds the beauty of their pedals in darkness. This is relatable to me and makes me sad. Something I believe you could possibly alter would be to add a question mark following your second line. Originally I though about suggesting changing the adjective in you fourth line from 'silent' to something along the lines of 'siziling' or 'tearful'. However I dawned on me that the storm is likely an allusion to the mental struggles of the speaker, thus why they would be silent. This is my mistake.

The second stanza brings to mind thoughts of a rose pretending to be an embodiment of love, trying with all its heart. However it knows subconsciously that love is a double edged sword. It is privy to the 'lost souls' who've undergone its pain of love's true burden. After this epiphany so to speak the rose embraces its status as a symbol of death. Though not before 'crying blood stain tears filling up the ponds of misery.' This is an excellent mental image and my favorite poetic flair in this poem.

Finally, having come to terms with is position as deaths symbol the rose contemplates how its thorns can protect it. The conclusions the rose have drawn are painful and hard to swallow, nevertheless as it says 'true things shouldn't be erased. Now seeking refuge in the darkness we come full circle to the beginning of the poem. The rose still hopes to grow. It must be 'precise'. What exactly this precision is I found to be up to interpretation, allowing the reader to picture the rose enduring further on down the line, striving to grow to its full potential.

I hope you've found this useful and heartening. Again you've written a wonderful poem that resounds with me greatly.
Sincerely,
GoodieGoat




EsmerayaRose says...


Thank you so much.
@LiviLove



LiviLove says...


This is a great review thank you so much!!



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Wed Nov 03, 2021 2:05 am
silented1 says...



Try to be more personal in your poetry, like i am alone.




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Wed Nov 03, 2021 1:55 am
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AriesBookworm wrote a review...



I am Rose

I wonder will I ever grow

I hear the silent raindrops

From the storm that clouds my mind

I see the darkness that surrounds

Covering my petals in shadows of all kinds

I want to grow

I am alone


If this rose was with a dozen roses, or in a bouquet, this would be a happier poem. I imagine a single rose laying silently in a small pot on a windowsill, watching day turn into night.


I pretend that I am the symbol of love

When all love does is break

I feel each lost soul

I know the burden they truly hold

I touch the inner souls of truth

I worry that all is not well

I cry blood-stained tears

That fill the ponds of misery

I am the symbol of death


This rose has always been told that she symbolizes love. But what do we send to people in mourning? Flowers.

I understand my thorns

They keep me safe

I say the unsaid

True things shouldn’t just be erased.

I dream about the darkness

It’s my only escape

I try to be precise

I hope to grow

I am a Rose


They say every rose has its thorns, but this doesn't always mean that people are deadlier than they seem. This can symbolize how everyone has their insecurities.


Overall: Excellent poem!




EsmerayaRose says...


Thanks for the kind review!



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Tue Nov 02, 2021 5:43 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...



This is a lovely little story from the perspective of a rose.This rose holds so many wishes and hopes for love,but it’s all drained and there is nothing left.The rose is left with disappointment,death and despair.It’s so much pressure for a delicate rose and it just fades into darkness.The rose hopes to flourish and make dreams come true.I loved the poem.I hope you have a great day/night.




EsmerayaRose says...


Thanks for the review!




What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.
— J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye