Young Writers Society

You shine, furiously bright, like a comet in the sky.
From your position high up, you rain stardust on my cheeks.
Your fingers trace rainbows in the pale grey sky
And your smile makes diamonds pop up from the sullen ground.
You are beautiful and I want to stare at you for eternity.
When you speak, your words cause flowers to bloom.
These multitude of beauties pull powerfully on my heart
And though I have many defenses, I have no power against you.
For cruelty, I have walls, for deception, I have moats,
For blind anger, I have thousands of soldiers ready to fight.
But you, you have neither spears nor swords.
You are not hard in your actions. You are soft, like a feather,
And you walk with compassion in your step. You dazzle me
With your marble-like complexion and I melt to you.

As I watch you, I dream of you. Fantasies trapped
Inside the walls of my skull, they bring me pleasure and pain.
Could I capture you? Hold you, like a butterfly,
Caught between my slim fingers? Would you stay there?
Or would you fly away, taking wing along the wind
Leaving me only with your imprints on my hand?
If we were two parallel lines, would there be a way
For us to meet? Could a train knock us off the tracks
Till we rolled our way into each other’s arms?
Would you even recognize me if we did?
I don’t know. So I squeeze my eyes tight
And clutch tightly to shoulders, hoping if I concentrate
And think and breathe and dream hard enough
Maybe one day, you’ll be there when I wake in the morning.

But I know this is nothing but idle daydreaming.
When I open my eyes, you are not there, and I return
To the reality that has been there all along.
Under the sun’s rays, I see us as we really are.
We are two distant shadows, spinning apart
Our shadows barely touch, and will not for much longer.
All we can do is go along, our rhythms slowly reverberating
Throughout the galaxy, where they reach other.
You are merely a faint echo, stretching through
The endless darkness between the two of us.

But that will never be enough.
I want something so real
I can trace its outline in the sand.
My heart screams for the trappings of love
For lazy picnics and dips into a waterfall
Endless evenings swinging on the porch
Sunrises and sunsets and everything in between.
I want someone’s warm hands to touch mine
Long arms to catch me when I fall
To hold me tight when I begin to scream
And gentle hands to wipe away my tears.
You are merely a ghost, a whisper on the wind
You cannot bring me happiness.

So I close my eyes. The vision of you fades
As your features become blurry, obscured
By a rising stream of smoke. It is a fire within me
Kindled by my hatred and resentment and anger.
It burns everything down, until I am left floating
In the midst of empty air. I have lost all sensation
And so I no longer mourn the loss of you.
You no longer exist to me. You are an abstraction.
You are a distraction. You are gone from my sight.
I will not think of you any longer. I will cut myself off
Because it is better than watching my hopes dashed
Again and again, like waves breaking against the seashore.
It is better to feel endless pain than to have the chains of unearned hope.