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Application Essay

by Em16


I'm filling out an application and I have to answer the question:

Describe a recent time you resolved a disagreement with your parents, authority figures, or friends. What did you do? What did you learn?

And I responded with this:

The movie Rocketman, a biopic of the life of Elton John, was a recent source of disagreement between my mother and I. My mother, seeing the contents of the movie, thought it wasn’t appropriate for me to watch. The graphic depictions of drugs and sex in the movie concerned her, as she thought they might send the wrong messages. It seemed to her like the movie was of questionable value, and there were better movies to watch.

I was frustrated with her response, because I saw a lot of value in the film. However, I recognized her good intentions. She was trying to protect me from something she feared would be harmful, and I appreciated that desire. So I addressed her concerns thoroughly and explained my perspective in a calm, respectful manner.

I explained how I found Elton John’s story inspiring because of his struggle to deal with homophobia, drug addiction, and unloving parents. Watching Rocketman would teach me powerful lessons about courage, strength, and vulnerability. I also reassured her that I was mature enough to sift through the ideas in the film and sort the bad from the good. I know about the dangers of drugs and sex, and I made it clear she did not have to worry about me engaging in any harmful activities.

My mother eventually acquiesced and allowed me to watch the movie. This conversation could have turned into an argument that strained our relationship, but instead I was able to avoid conflict. By taking the time to respectfully and thoroughly explain my perspective, without negating my mother’s, I was able to convince her of the validity of my opinion. Through this instance I learned communication is possible among people who disagree, as long as you respectfully try to bridge the gaps between your differing perspectives. 


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59 Reviews


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Thu Nov 11, 2021 10:55 pm
SofieR wrote a review...



Hey there! I think you did a really good sticking to the point and illustrating why this instance proves your skills in resolving disagreements. I really like your final paragraph and how you tied everything together in a nice little bow. The Disagreement could have turned into a days-long argument but instead you were able to explain your position calmly and rationally- a skill that will definitely serve you throughout life. Also, side note - glad you were able to watch Rocketman because it was amazzzing lol

- Sofie




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Sun Oct 24, 2021 3:50 am
TheWordsOfWolf wrote a review...



uh hi I'm Wolf. First off do you give lessons? not on writing although I could probably use those two but on your way of resolving conflict with your paternal authorities...?
Well although that would be nice thats not what I am here for. I am here to review this.
I was glad to see something of a more academic nature here on YWS I was considering posting some of my own and I hope others do as well. You describe the situation very clearly, and the wording you use is very precise and colorful. Your paragraph breaks are also something I am pleased to see as they clearly and simply separate the development of your theme.
One suggestion I would have is that you go into more detail about your mothers concerns and in turn your defense, maybe use some direct quotes.
Overall this was very good.




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Tue Oct 19, 2021 2:58 pm
Kz says...



Nice one😉




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Sun Oct 17, 2021 4:07 am
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Spearmint says...



Hiya, I'm mint! ^-^ It's been a while since I wrote a review, so I'll just leave this as a comment. Anyways, I enjoyed reading your essay-- you definitely seem mature and capable!
I do have a super quick suggestion though, just from my personal preference. I feel like adding some dialogue or in-the-moment action might make your essay even more engaging to read. For example, you might start off with your mother listing a reason she didn't think Rocketman was appropriate, then an example of you responding. Like, "'Rocketman?' My mother frowned. 'That's ...'" Of course, I don't know all the details of this application, so please disregard this suggestion if there's a word limit or a specific way you've been instructed to write this!
Overall, I think this essay already does a great job of showing you as a reasonable, clear communicator. I wish you the best of luck getting in! =D




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Fri Oct 15, 2021 4:58 am
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HarryHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

First Impression: Okayy, so a pretty simple piece here, but I think you do answer this question pretty well here. You've brought across your point quite well and I especially like you applied what you learnt on such a broad spectrum.

Anyway let's get right to it,

I'm filling out an application and I have to answer the question:

Describe a recent time you resolved a disagreement with your parents, authority figures, or friends. What did you do? What did you learn?


Hmm....well I ran into one of these yesterday, and I thought it was a pretty good read, so here we are, at another one of these answering another one of these questions. This one seems like perhaps it can be even more of a challenging thing to talk about, so let's see what it's like.

The movie Rocketman, a biopic of the life of Elton John, was a recent source of disagreement between my mother and I. My mother, seeing the contents of the movie, thought it wasn’t appropriate for me to watch. The graphic depictions of drugs and sex in the movie concerned her, as she thought they might send the wrong messages. It seemed to her like the movie was of questionable value, and there were better movies to watch.


Hmm...this is a good place to start there. Once again, I see you're doing a great job of sort of giving a general overview of the challenge that you faced so that those who read this have a good amount of context for what's going to happen next.

I was frustrated with her response, because I saw a lot of value in the film. However, I recognized her good intentions. She was trying to protect me from something she feared would be harmful, and I appreciated that desire. So I addressed her concerns thoroughly and explained my perspective in a calm, respectful manner.


Hmm, this is a good demonstration of a pretty mature approach for a problem. That's a nice little thing to explain there, dealing with such a conflict without getting angry and trying to see the point of view of the other party certainly shows a lot about the person here. Good stuff to include in an application.

I explained how I found Elton John’s story inspiring because of his struggle to deal with homophobia, drug addiction, and unloving parents. Watching Rocketman would teach me powerful lessons about courage, strength, and vulnerability. I also reassured her that I was mature enough to sift through the ideas in the film and sort the bad from the good. I know about the dangers of drugs and sex, and I made it clear she did not have to worry about me engaging in any harmful activities.


Hmm, I like how you do include the points that you made rather than simply saying that you brought up points. Its gives a bit more validity to what you're claiming and you can also see that the points themselves are pretty good ones and not anything you simply stated to get your way.

My mother eventually acquiesced and allowed me to watch the movie. This conversation could have turned into an argument that strained our relationship, but instead I was able to avoid conflict. By taking the time to respectfully and thoroughly explain my perspective, without negating my mother’s, I was able to convince her of the validity of my opinion. Through this instance I learned communication is possible among people who disagree, as long as you respectfully try to bridge the gaps between your differing perspectives.


That certainly seems like a pretty valuable lesson learnt there. I think you've done a pretty good job of bringing across that. I really like you how you try and generalize these conclusions as much as possible so they apply to a wide variety of situations one can face in life.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

Overall: Overall, there's not much for me to say here. It was a good read. And that's about all I have to say :D

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry





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