Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: This seemed like a pretty cool Norse sounding at the start then it become a really fun little village scene from times long past. I loved the dialogue and interactions, it all felt very realistic to how a real family would communicate and its just a fun and very wholesome scene.
Anyway let's get right to it,
The fertile land was green and lush; the heavens above were icy blue, harbouring the first Sun; the seas were calm, and beautifully reflected the mid day Sun. The fishing town of Gyraghdryll sat quietly and peacefully on the coast, the sea air rushing through the town and up, into every man, woman and child’s lungs. Gyraghdryll was small, but accommodated a hefty number of inhabitants, it looked cosy from the heavens, that and clean which was a rarity compared to most towns in Midgard. And then there were the people of Gyraghdryll, they may not have had much, but they had each other, that and there town mead, which they could drink all day, and night.
Okay looks like we be starting off with a bit of a setting description...a decent way to start off if maybe just slightly long. Not exactly the most attention grabby way to start....just a lot of unpronounceable words that appear to be from Norse Mythology so in that sense its a little weaker than it could be.
“Y’all stop with the pig.” Hilde yelled as she arrived back home from the docks. Hilde was a short stout woman, with thick, rich, fiery red hair, her skin was as white as the snow that fell come winter but as warm as her ale filled heart.
“But ma’, she’s lively today.” One of the children stated.
Okay interesting...we have ourselves a bit of an accent here...and done fairly decently, at least I can understand what on Earth they are saying and that's always a plus.
“Yoah, well, alright then, but don’t tire her now; don’t want her to loose weight.” Hilde replied whilst placing a fresh loaf on the wooden kitchen top to calve into shares.
“Why not ma’?” one of the children asked.
“Well, y’all be withering away if she does, bare that in mind now.” Hilde replied solemnly pointing the knife at the children indirectly.
Well yaa...she does have a pretty good point there...sad but 'tis how life worked.
“Aye, when I was ‘bout your age we ate the pig last, ain’t that right ma’?” The oldest of the children explained.
And this other person didn't know something that you'd think would be a very talked about activity? Seems unusual.
“Pa’ came by ‘bout an hour ago, down at the Aler’s now I think. He came by with cousin Helgar too ma’.” Ingrid explained.
“Cousin Eirik’s in town? Well, he never did say.” Hilde challenged, “You sure it was cousin Eirik?”
Wait why do they refer to the same person by two separate names or are they referring to two people here?
“Aye, she’s right ma’, he brought mead too.” The boy from behind the pig’s hind leg explained as he stood up, then made his way over to the door and leapt onto a barrel, “It real big ain’t it ma’?”
“And so it is,” Hilde declared stepping over to the barrel, “Now get down will you Snorre- you’ll do yourself a nasty injury.”
Okay for a second I though that was the pigs name...kind of a weird name for a child to have.
“Aye, y’all do, and then bring ‘em back here. Oh, cousin Eirik will have some stories to tell he will, great stories from afar.” Hilde stated excitedly.
“Stories?” Another child asked, this child was the spitting image of Ingrid, just half of the size.
“Aye,” Ingrid began, “When cousin Eirik visits he always got’s stories to tell.”
Ahh he's that kind of cousin...sounds nice...
Hilde slowly opened the old wooden door, “Now what y’all waiting for eh?”
The four children all looked at the fifth child- Ingrid- she nodded, prior to all of them rushing out of the door screaming either, “Stories!” or “Cousin Eirik!”
Well that was a fun place to end on...love the idea there of them all charging out like that. A beautiful image to end things on.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall it was a really fun little story and besides a couple of very nitpicky things I couldn't really find too much wrong with it all. I loved reading it and the relationship between the mother and the children was really portrayed well. Great Job!!
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Oh. I just realized. You are from England so you spell cozy that way... Okay. But still split the paragraphs.
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Reviews: 4101
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