Hello there, SammyJ. In the name of the Knights of the Green Room and our Most Sacred and Tireless Quest to ensure that no works go unreviewed in the realm of the Literary Area, here I have come to free your long unreviewed piece from its state of reviewlessness on this fine Review Day. I hope you don’t mind. :3
First things first: this is a gigantic block of text oh my and it is visually quite intimidating. My eyes went O_O when I opened this, and right now, I'm wondering if the submissions editor ate all your line breaks because wow. In any case, I would like to strongly recommend that you go back in and edit line breaks into this because the text block is very block-like and scary-looking.
With that said, reading this through, this feels more like a letter or a reflection piece. It doesn't really feel like a poem, mainly because everything is literal, and you really don't have that much by the way of unique or memorable imagery. It's also quite repetitive in the sentence structure, and the fact that you have cohesive, complete sentences is what really makes me wonder if this is a poem at all.
In any case, paragraphing and/or line breaks are a must for this piece as massive text blocks scare readers away.
Points: 72525
Reviews: 1220
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