z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Stevie's Stories Chapters 4-6

by FluffyDuckling


Read Chapters 1-3 here!



Chapter Four

I watched from the couch as Andrew raced up and down the stairs, doing some last minute cleaning to the house to make it look more “presentable”.

Dr. Trepper called two days ago saying that he’d be able to come for dinner and Mom and Dad scheduled a date, and that day had finally arrived. Ever since, Andrew’s been going overboard, talking about it all the time and annoying the heck out of me.

I had decided to do some “research” on my own and maybe learn a little bit about this guy so I knew what we were getting into. When searching for “Wilson Trepper”, a random blogger’s made up character and some millionaire from Sweden came up in the search results. Beside the fact that he was in his 70s or 80s, the millionaire guy seemed to fit the description that Andrew gave. A millionaire was coming for dinner… Awesome!

I heard the sound of a car outside and I peeked out the window to see a silver Ford Focus pulling into the driveway. “Mom!” I called out. “He’s here!”

30 seconds later, the doorbell rang. Andrew pounded down the stairs so he could answer the door, but Mom beat him to it.

“Hello,” I heard her say as she opened the door. “You must be Dr. Trepper. Please, come in.”

“Thanks,” came the reply. I peered over to the front door where Dr. Trepper stood. The man was tall and slim, I’d guess around 6’3. He had dark blonde hair, glasses, and he wore a dark blue suit jacket with brown trousers. He looked nothing like the millionaire guy I found on the internet, and in my opinion, the man standing at our doorstep was really weird. Maybe he was the rich guy’s son…

Mom showed him to the dining room while I followed at a slight distance. Dad was already there, bringing in food from the kitchen while Andrew helped set the table.

“Hi, welcome,” Dad said. He placed a pot of curry down on a trivet and extended his hand out to shake. “I’m Aaron, this is my wife Laura, Andrew, who I’m sure you know already, and,” he gestured to me, “this is Stevie.” I wondered to myself why he said my name last, but it didn’t matter anyway.

“Hi Dr. Trepper,” I said shyly.

“You can call me Wilson,” he said emotionlessly. “I’m not working as a doctor right now, so you don’t have to call me ‘Dr. Trepper’.”

“Okay, Wilson,” Mom said with a smile. Food was served out and our awkward dinner had started.

“So, where are you from?” Dad asked.

“Brighton, England,” the doctor replied boredly.

“Coincidence, I was born there,” Mom said cheerfully, “but I grew up in London.”

“Wouldn’t it be so funny if you guys had met?” I asked quietly, but no one payed any attention.

“What’s it like in England?” Andrew quipped. “I’ve always thought it's a cool place.” It wouldn’t surprise me if he was just saying that so he could be involved in the conversation. He probably didn’t give a hoot about all the other countries.

Wilson shrugged. “I don’t know. Same as here, just everyone speaks with accents, I guess.”

Mom chuckled. “And everyone drives on the wrong side of the road,” I added.

“But for them, it’s the right side,” Dad said with a laugh. “Right, Wilson?”

“I guess,” Wilson said. I couldn’t help but notice his lack of humor. What is it with doctors that they don’t have any sense of humor?

Dinner went on uneventfully. Dad and Mom decided that it was time for Andrew and I to head to bed because “we have to get up early for school tomorrow”, etcetera etcetera.

But me being my “usual, rebellious self”, as Mom would say, I wanted to stay up and learn a bit more about this Wilson Trepper. So far, I learned that he isn’t married, isn’t interested in finding a “soul mate”, and that he lives by himself. And I know this all because sometimes Mom and Dad can be a little too pushy...

Dressed in my pajamas, I slowly walked down the stairs, making sure not to let my footsteps be heard because if my parents were to see me spying on them…

I found a spot where I could look into the dining room - hopefully they didn’t see me - and sat down on the steps. I watched as Dad went over to the wine cabinet in the corner of the room and brought out a bottle. When Andrew and I aren’t there, Dad and Mom always bring out the “good stuff”.

“Would you like some?” Dad offered. “This wine is from a good year - when Laura and I got married.” He smiled to himself.

“No, thank you,” Wilson answered.

“Can I ask something?” Mom spoke up. “How did you know what medicine to give Andrew? Dr. Stein said that Andrew had some really strange condition that even he knew nothing about.”

There was silence for a few minutes. “Andrew has an illness,” Wilson finally siad. “It’s a very rare condition that not many people have, but it is very dangerous.”

“What exactly does this illness do?”

Wilson paused. “Not even I know, and because it’s so uncommon, no one’s even come up with a name for it.”

“Is Andrew in danger of anything?” Dad said worriedly.

There was more silence. I heard Mom gasp, then after she calmed down, she said, “But you prescribed a medicine and it helped him.”

Crydliserine* seems to relieve the symptoms, but it only has temporary effects as it is just a pain killer.”

More silence.

“I’d suggest you keep on giving him the medicine and it should keep him going for several years,” Wilson said. “Crydliserine should keep the illness under control, and you should increase the dosage if when he passes out, he feels pain, but after a while the medicine will stop working and... ”

“I think it’s best we not tell the kids,” Dad spoke up. “It would hurt them, and I don’t want to cause any more pain to the family.”

Mom nodded her head. So, they’re going to hide the fact that my younger brother is dying… Thank goodness I was sitting here, listening in or I wouldn’t have known. I heard a whimpering sound from behind me and I turned around to see Andrew standing there. “What’re you doing here?” I hissed.

His bottom lip started to tremble and I could tell he was fighting back tears. “I’m going to die,” he manage to say.

“Wilson said the medicine is going to help you,” I whispered, trying to comfort him.

“I’m still going to die, eventually the medicine isn’t going to work anymore!” he protested. I tried to shush him, but his sobs were getting louder and soon Mom and Dad would hear that we’d been listening in.

“You’re not going to die,” I said determinedly. “Wilson isn’t going to let you, Mom and Dad aren’t going to let you, and if they can’t stop it, then I will.” I pulled him into a hug and we sat there on the stairs, huddled next to each other until we heard the sound of dinner being cleared up. “Come on,” I said, standing up. We hurried up to our rooms unnoticed.

I had trouble falling asleep that night, I felt a sharp pain in my chest and I just couldn’t get rid of it. It felt so strange, I realized how much I loved my brother. Wilson’s words repeated themselves over and over again in my head. When we were younger, Andrew, just like your average stereotypical child, thought that there were ghosts in the closet, and I’d tell him that at all costs, I would protect him. And now, I was going to continue protecting him, no matter what. As his older sister, I wasn’t going to let this happen. Never ever.

* * * * *

I woke up the next morning to the sound of silence. Usually Mom would be doing stuff in the kitchen or Dad would be talking on the phone to one of his clients, but this time, there was nothing. After getting dressed, I hurried downstairs to find Mom and Dad sitting at the kitchen table, concerned looks on their faces. Had I not listened in last night, I would have been very confused as to why they were acting so strangely.

“Hey Dad, hey Mom,” I said, pretending to act cheerful and carefree like I usually was, but my smile still felt really put on. “Is anything wrong? You seem a bit… different.”

Mom gave a small smile. “Everything’s fine, Honey.”

“Then why are you two sitting at the table… looking so strange?” I asked, trying to act clueless. “Didn’t dinner go well last night?”

“Yeah, just, we’ve been discussing a lot of things and…” Dad started to say, but his voice trailed off.

“Don’t worry, Stevie, nothing’s wrong. Now, what would you like for breakfast?” Mom asked, hastily changing the subject.

I shrugged. “I dunno, I’m not very hungry.” And this time, I was speaking the truth. I didn’t feel like eating anything after hearing what was going to happen to my younger brother last night.

“I’ll cook up some eggs,” Mom said, standing up. “And for Andrew, too.”

I ate my breakfast in silence while Mom and Dad went upstairs to “discuss something in private”. Andrew came down just as I had put my plate in the sink. “Here, Mom made these for you,” I said, gesturing to the scrambled eggs that were waiting in the frying pan.

“I’m not hungry,” Andrew muttered.

“Nor was I,” I said. “But you can’t not eat breakfast. Besides, these eggs are really good.” I gave a comforting smile.

Andrew shrugged. “I don’t want to go back there.”

“Back where?” I asked as I began to put away my dishes.

“To school.”

I nodded my head in agreement. “Yeah, same here.”

Andrew looked up at me, his eyes all red probably from crying himself to sleep. “I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. What’s there to do if I’m just going to die in the end?”

“There is so much to do with your life, Andrew,” I said warmly, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. I pulled him into a small hug but stepped back when I saw Mom and Dad coming down the stairs. We couldn’t let on that we were listening in and for all they know, I still hate Andrew.

The bus pulled up at Eastern Middle School at 7:45 and I hopped out of the bus, anxious to get to my classroom, but I waited for Andrew to make his way through the crowd of kids piling out of the bus.

We walked into the building together, something we'd never done before. I even led him to his classroom, just in case there were any bullies trying to harass him. "I'll see you later at recess, okay?" I said when he had settled in behind his desk.

Andrew nodded his head, "Okay." I smiled before heading off to my classroom.

When I was just a few feet from my classroom door, I heard the sound of loud cackling from inside. Something funny must've been going on - probably Stewart Middleton had brought in his pet turtle again - but I wasn't in the mood for funny.

I entered the classroom to find Michael sitting on top of his desk, the rest of my class watching in amusement as he told his story.

"... and then you wouldn't believe what happened next! Because I refused to get Princess Heather of Lazy-land a stupid glass of orange juice which she could have gotten herself had she got off her lazy butt, she hit me!"

"Then what'd you do?" Dana Richman asked eagerly, her eyes wide open with curiosity.

"I hit her back, duh!" Michael bellowed, and the class bursted out laughing again. "She actually got off the chair for once and started kicking me repeatedly and, me being older and stronger than she, I knocked her off her feet and onto the ground-!"

"That's enough!" I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up from my seat and slammed my fists down against the desk. I could feel the anger rising up inside of me as I stared at Michael and the rest of the class. "Does it at all hurt you that you just attacked your younger sister?! She's six years younger than you, for g-d's sake! Her strikes aren't going to hurt you - you're 15 years old while she's only ten - and yet you decide to hit her back just because you're capable of hurting her!

"Maybe there's a reason she asks you to do stuff for her! You're her older brother! She looks up to you! And what do you do about that?! You don't do anything to help her! Instead you badmouth her to your entire class! How do you think she would feel if she knew all the things you've said about her behind her back?

"Tell me Michael, what would you do if you were in her place? If Heather was your older sister and refused to get things for you when you asked? And then you heard her telling all her friends how stupid you are?! It'd hurt, wouldn't it. Picture yourself in her shoes for once then rethink all the horrible things that you've done to her." All eyes were on me, and my face flushed a deep red. Not because I was embarrassed, but because my blood was boiling with anger.

Michael's jaw dropped, but he soon regained his composure. "What about Andrew?" he asked meanly. "You hate him just as much as I hate Heather. No, you hate him more. He almost caused you to miss the dance last week because your Mom decided to sack you on him. How do you think you would feel if you were placed in his shoes?!"

"You've got a point there, Mike," commented Jared Olivers.

"Oh shut up, Jared!" I snapped. "I may have hated Andrew, I may have thought he was a brat who’s only purpose in life was to annoy the heck out of me for no apparent reason, but not anymore. I regret everything I did to him, everything I said about him behind his back, because it was wrong... and because I love him."

There was silence. No one said anything. Michael started laughing, and then the rest of the class. “You’ve certainly changed!” Michael exclaimed. “Just last week, you were saying how stupid Andrew was!”

“Oh you bet I’ve changed,” I said zealously, raising my voice. “I know that what I did was wrong, but you don’t give a darn about what you did to Heather! You’re so stupid! Stupid, stuck-up, and… I don’t know how to describe you at all! You’re just..!” I was at a loss of words. My heart pounded in my chest and my face was burning. Everyone started laughing even more. I began to have second thoughts, wondering why I even stood up against him in the first place. It’s for Andrew, I told myself. “I’m never going to a dance with you every again!!” I cried.

“That’s completely fine with me. I’m sorry to say this, Stevie, but you stink at dancing!” Michael shot back, crossing his arms and giving me an evil smirk.

I was about to yell something back when Ms. James walked into the classroom, her hair done up and all, it seemed she was having a good day. Michael slid off the top of his desk and into his seat while everyone else sat up straight and smiled at the teacher as if nothing happened. I quickly did the same, but Ms. James could probably tell that something was wrong.

When class got out at recess, I hurried out of the classroom, not giving anyone a chance to even talk to me. I heard someone calling my name from behind me, and I glanced over my shoulder to see Molly McKessie running towards me. “Stevie,” she said once she caught up to me, “I just wanted to say, what you said in class this morning, it was very moving. Everything you said… Wow.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled, walking past her and out to the schoolyard where I spotted Andrew standing by himself. “How was class?” I asked as I approached him. I did my best to hide any signs of my argument with Michael earlier.

“It was fine,” he said plainly. “Same as usual.”

“What does that mean?”

Andrew shrugged. “Nothing much happened. What about you?”

“Today was no fun at all,” I said with a sigh. “Michael was telling a stupid story, and he showed his true colors…”

Andrew frowned. “You mean, how he gets physical sometimes?”

“How’d you know that?”

Andrew waited a few seconds before answering. “The day before the dance,” he said. “He pushed me up against the side of the building… He didn’t want me getting in the way of the dance and…”

I opened my mouth to speak but closed it for I didn’t know what to say. “Why didn’t you say anything about this before?” I managed to say, worry in my voice.

“I knew how much the dance meant to you so I didn’t say anything,” Andrew said, staring down at his feet.

I didn’t know what to say. “Oh Andrew,” I exclaimed, pulling him into a hug. We stood there, attracting stares from other students passing by, but I didn’t care. How could I have not cared about Andrew when he cared so much for me…?

The sound of loud laughing came from the building entrance and I turned to see Michael and his friends approaching us. “Hey! Look at sweet little Stevie and Andrew!” Michael exclaimed, pointing at us and cackling. He walked closer to us and before I could say anything, he pushed me aside, knocked Andrew off his feet and onto the ground, then he and his friends started kicking him.

I watched in horror as they beat up my younger brother. I could see Andrew, a very fearful expression on his face, and I couldn’t take it anymore. Adrenaline rushing through my veins, I pulled myself up and through the circle of boys surrounding Andrew, and with a clenched fist, I punched Michael square in the face.

I didn’t mean to hit him so hard, just enough to get him off my brother. Michael’s hands went up to his nose, blood beginning to drip from his nostrils. Andrew looked horrified, as did the rest of the kids watching us, but I felt pleased.

Chapter Five

“What were you thinking?!?” Mom exclaimed, walking back and forth in front of me and Andrew. One of the students had called a teacher in to break up the fight, and Michael and Andrew were brought to the nurse’s station immediately. I hadn’t punched Michael’s nose hard enough that it broke, but I definitely caused a lot of damage. As for Andrew, he had quite a few bruises, but Mom didn’t seem to care. She hadn’t even given us a chance to explain the situation.

“Mom,” I said, trying to defend myself. “I punched him because he was hurting Andrew-”

“Never, not in any circumstances, are you to get physical. You should’ve tried to reason with him!” Mom shouted back, why couldn’t she understand me???

“Then why did he start kicking me?!” Andrew spoke up.

Mom started to speak, but the door to the principal’s office opened and the secretary let us inside. Michael and his parents sat in three chairs across from the desk, and there were three empty chairs waiting for us.

“Please, sit down,” Mr. Marshal said, gesturing to the empty seats.

I took the chair farthest away from Michael and did the best I could to avoid eye contact with him and the principal. Michael scowled at me, but I pretended to ignore him.

“I’m so sorry,” Mom said quietly but very apologetically to Michael’s mother who looked quite peeved.

“So, I hear there’s been quite a fight in the school yard,” Mr. Marshal began. “Michael, would you please tell us what happened?” The principal stayed very calm for the entire time.

“I went to the school yard, Stevie and Andrew were there and she suddenly came up towards me and punched me in the face for no reason!” Stupid Michael lied.

“That’s not true!” I shouted. “He came over to us and he and his friends-” Mr. Marshal held up his hand to signal to me to shut my mouth.

“Stevie, it’s not your turn to speak,” the principal said to me, then he turned back to Michael and his crazy lies. “Please continue.”

“Then the teacher came because another kid called her, and the nurse came,” he said.

“Now Andrew, what do you say happened?”

Andrew, who had been sitting quietly and staring down at his feet, gulped when he heard his name. “Stevie was… Um… Stevie and I were hanging out in the yard when Michael and his friends came over, knocked me to the ground, and started kicking me. Stevie wanted to protect me, so she punched Michael in the face,” he stammered.

“Michael, why were you kicking Andrew?”

Michael didn’t respond. He seemed to be at a loss of words. His expression was a mix of anger and worry, and I could tell that his anger was directed at Andrew, judging by the way he kept on glaring at him.

“I-I think it was because of something that went on in Stevie and Michael’s class earlier,” Andrew said.

“It was,” I added, even though I knew pretty well that Mr. Marshal didn’t want me talking when “it wasn’t my turn.”

“Alright, Stevie, can you tell us what happened?” the principal said, turning towards me.

“Earlier today before class,” I began nervously, “Michael was telling the whole class about a fight he had with his younger sister… and I just couldn’t handle it anymore. And, well….” Michael shot me a worried glance. Even though I hated Michael so much right now, I didn’t want to embarrass him about his fight with Heather. “We got into an argument.”

“Michael, can you explain this?” Mr. Marshal asked with concern.

Michael’s cheeks flushed red. He was quite embarrassed now. I pitied him - I’d have hated to talk about my original feelings about Andrew in front of my parents and the principal.

When Michael didn’t say anything, Mr. Marshal stood up from his chair and spoke, “I don’t ever want something like this to happen again. Physical fights are completely uncalled for, even if you’re having an argument. And I don’t even want to see one on my campus ever again, do I make myself clear? If I ever find the three of you punching and kicking each other again, I’m afraid that I will have to send you out of this school.”

I leaned my head against the car window as Mom drove us back home. Mr. Marshal sent Michael, Andrew, and I home early. Since tomorrow was Saturday, Michael was to be suspended until Wednesday and me until Tuesday. Andrew was just sent home so he could recover from Michael’s attack.

“I had told you there was something I didn’t like about Michael,” Mom said as she pulled the car into our driveway.

“That was because he used to always wear black when he first moved in,” I said, a tiny hint of humor in my voice.

“He beat up Andrew,” Mom said. “And last week, he slammed him up against the wall. Why would he do that?”

I shrugged. “I dunno. But I do know that I don’t want to hang out with him anymore if this is what he’s really like.” I hurried inside and up to my room. Today had taken quite a toll on me and I needed some time to myself.

After taking a much needed rest, I went downstairs just as Mom was serving out dinner. We ate our chili and rice in silence until Dad started talking. I had a feeling it was going to be about the fight at school again, but it wasn’t.

“Andrew,” Dad said, taking out a small bottle from his jacket pocket, “we want you to start taking this… medicine. Crydliserine, it’s called. You just have to take one pill per day. It’s just a precaution in case you get sick again.”

Andrew glanced at me through the corner of his eye. “Okay…”

* * * * *

I woke up early the next morning to the sound of Taylor Swift’s “I Knew You Were Trouble” coming from my phone. I reached out from under the covers and checked the caller ID. I wanted to go back to sleep when I saw who was calling. Part of me was telling myself to pick up, but I didn’t want to talk to Michael after everything that happened yesterday. Without thinking it through fully, I pressed the “answer” button and held the phone up to my ear.

“Stevie?” came Michael’s voice.

“What?” I replied snarkily. “I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Listen, Stevie, I’m really, really sorry about what happened yesterday. I wasn’t myself… and…” he let out a sigh. I couldn’t tell if he was sincerely sorry or if he was calling because his parents told him to. “Do you think you could come over to my place later this afternoon and… we can talk about it face to face?”

I remained silent. Michael’s house has always been one of my favorite places to hang out, but I didn’t feel like going there. “I’ll talk to my mother,” I said. “And if she says yes, I’ll be there around 12 or 12:30.”

“Thanks.”

I hung up the phone and placed it back on the side table. I slept for a few more hours before finally getting up.

When I got downstairs, Dad was on the phone, but when he saw me, he took the phone elsewhere so he could talk in private. I figured his strange behavior had something to do with Andrew’s illness that “Andrew and I don’t know about yet”.

“I wonder what he’s talking about,” Andrew murmured from behind me.

I shrugged. “He’s probably talking to a doctor or someone like that,” I said as I opened the refrigerator and took out a cup of yogurt.

Andrew nodded his head. “Yeah, probably.”

I waited for Mom to come down so I could tell her that I’d be going to Michael’s, but I didn’t see her as I ate the last bits of my yogurt. “Andrew,” I said as I tossed the yogurt cup into the garbage, “tell Mom or Dad that I’m going to out today.” I decided not to tell Andrew where I was going because he might think that I was plotting with the enemy or something like that.

“Where’re you going?” Andrew asked as I grabbed my bicycle helmet from the hat rack. “Mom’s not going to be very happy, after all, you’re suspended from school and-”

“Bye!” I called over my shoulder as I hurried out the door. I wheeled out my bike from where I had it chained up against the fence, and I was off.

Usually I love bicycling long distances - it’s a great way to enjoy the outdoors and lose weight, but today I just wasn’t in the mood. Cycling for half an hour all the way to Old Greenwich didn’t seem like so much fun anymore.

I was 8 minutes from Michael’s house when I tired out and had to stop for a few minutes. My legs were aching from all that pedaling, so I walked my bike the rest of the way.

The afternoon heat was getting to be pretty bad and I could feel sweat forming all over my face. I tugged at the collar of my T-shirt, trying to cool off a little bit, but it didn’t help very much.

As I walked my bike along the sidewalk, I saw a familiar face on the other side of the road. “Hey!” I called out. “Dr. Trepper!” I glanced to the left and right sides of the road before crossing the street.

The doctor, surprisingly dressed in a dark blue coat and a grey scarf, along with a little girl walking beside him. He slowed down and waited for me to catch up.

“Hi,” I said, catching my breath. “Mind if I walk with you?”

“Why not?” Wilson said with a shrug. I couldn’t help but notice that he was kind of emotionless.

“Finally, someone to talk to!” piped up the young girl. She looked to be about five or six years old and had short, curly blonde hair. She shared a lot of resemblance to Wilson and it wouldn’t surprise me if she was his daughter. “Didn’t you say you weren’t married?” I asked Wilson. I was probably making a terrible fool of myself.

“I’m his sister,” the girl said. She had a British accent just like him, but hers was less prominent.

“Half-sister,” Wilson corrected.

I looked back and forth between the two. There was a huge age difference and it didn’t make sense that they were half-siblings. “What’s your name?” I asked cheerfully, turning towards the girl.

“Suzy,” she replied. “Short for Susan Esmeralda.”

“I’m Stevie,” I said, introducing myself to the little girl. It always felt good to be an “older person”.

“Nice to meet you,” Suzy said with a sweet smile.

We walked along silently until my curiosity got the best of me. I pulled up the picture of that millionaire from Sweden on my phone and held it up in front of the doctor. “Is this guy at all related to you?” I asked.

Wilson eyed the picture. “I don’t believe so…”

“Can I see?” Suzy asked excitedly. “Can I???”

I showed the picture to her and she immediately started giggling. “It could be you, Wilson! He’s got the same name.”

“Just because two people share the same name doesn’t mean that they’re the same person,” Wilson said pointedly. "Besides, that guy’s middle name is different than mine….”

“What’s yours?” I asked curiously.

“It’s very dull.”

“It probably sounds a lot better than Amelia,” I said. Wilson didn’t say anything more. I realized that there was no way I could make conversation with him, so I decided to just stay quiet.

“Can we talk about fun things?” Suzy piped up. “Let’s talk about… I don’t know. The playground. I love the playground. Anna promised to take me to the playground, but she never did.”

“Anna?” I repeated. “You mean, Anna Smith?”

“You’ve met her?” Suzy asked flatly.

“Yeah, she babysat my younger brother once,” I said.

“She’s not a good babysitter,” Suzy muttered. “And she’s crazy. She says she’ll do something and then she never does, and she’s always so annoying!”

“She dresses funny,” I added, causing the two of us to giggle.

“Hey, that’s not very nice,” Wilson interrupted.

“They’re boyfriend and girlfriend,” Suzy said in a low whisper.

“No we aren’t,” he replied. “We’re just friends.”

I chuckled. “Everyone says that when they try to deny that they’re in a relationship.”

“Seriously, why would I date someone seven years younger than me?” Wilson asked, turning to face us.

“I was only kidding,” I said quietly. It was quite obvious that he didn’t have a sense of humor at all.

“I wasn’t,” Suzy said with a cheshire cat like grin.

We continued walking silently until I reached Michael’s neighborhood. I was surprised that Wilson and Suzy were still here, walking beside me. Maybe they were following me and didn’t want to leave because maybe they thought it was impolite… “Just wondering, are you guys following me..?”

“No,” Wilson said. “I live over there.” He pointed down the street.

My jaw dropped when I looked the direction he was pointing at. Down the street, very close to the shoreline, was an old Victorian house. When Michael and I were younger, we used to say that that house was haunted and that the ghosts of the previous owners from the 1900s liked to come back and kill it’s residents. Obviously that wasn’t true. “You live there?!” I exclaimed in awe. “But how..? How did you afford that house? It must’ve costed a fortune!”

“It’s a long story,” Wilson said.

“He hasn’t even told me how he got it,” Suzy said.

“Oh my gosh, you have access to the Sound right from your backyard!” I exclaimed excitedly as we came closer to the house. Michael’s house is quite close to the Long Island Sound, but he doesn’t have water access right from his backyard. He has to cross the street for that.

I followed them up the path to the front door and I stared up at the house in awe as Wilson unlocked the door. “Can I come in?” I asked.

“Sure,” Wilson replied. I put the kickstand of my bike down and parked my bike on the grass, hoping no one was going to steal it. Then I stepped inside.

“Wow!” The front hallway had a beautiful mahogany flooring, and the place looked antique. “My, um… friend, Michael, he lives down the road in a victorian house, too, but it’s so small compared to this!!” I said in amazement.

“Really? I thought this house was kind of small for a victorian home,” Wilson said with a shrug as he took off his coat.

“Where did you grow up? A mansion of some sort, I bet,” I added teasingly.

“A small, cramped two-family house,” Wilson said, I was surprised to hear that.

“Oh,” I said. Yup, he most definitely didn’t have a sense of humor.. “Can I explore a little?”

“I can show her around,” Suzy said. “Please??”

Wilson nodded his head just as a big white and chestnut colored collie dog came running over from somewhere, barking excitedly. The dog ran past it’s owners and stood up on it’s hind legs right in front of me.

“Hello there,” I said playfully to the dog. “What’s your name?”

“She can’t speak; she’s a dog,” Suzy said, I could tell she inherited a bit of the “no humor” aspect from Wilson a teeny bit.

“Her name’s Chamomile,” Wilson said.

“She’s a gorgeous dog,” I said as I ran my fingers through her fur. The dog gave a happy bark before backing away from me.

“Come on, I have to show you the dining room!” Suzy exclaimed, grabbing my hand. “We never use it, but it’s so pretty!”

She led me to the dining room which was, just like she said, so pretty. “Did you get this house furnished or something?” I asked, turning to Wilson who was following behind us with Chamomile.

“Yeah, and I was pretty lucky to get it with all this furniture, otherwise the house would be pretty empty.”

“Say, is there a library? You know, like the library in Beauty and the Beast?” I asked, my eyes widening with excitement.

“There’s a library upstairs,” Wilson said casually.

“It’s boring there,” Suzy said, frowning and crossing her arms.

“I’ll go look at the library quickly, then you can show me around the rest of the place, okay?” I said to the little girl.

“Fine,” she said with a pout. “Come on Chamomile, let’s go the living room.”

I walked with Wilson up the stairs and onto the second floor. I saw what Wilson meant by this house being small for a victorian house because it only had two floors, but it was still a huge house compared to my house.

He stopped outside two sliding doors and pushed them open, revealing a huge library inside. “Wow!” I exclaimed, but I stopped short when I saw that there were next to no books in the shelves that were lining almost all the walls. “How is this a library if there are no books?”

Wilson pointed to a shelf all the way on the righthand wall. “I’ve got a few books there,” he said boredly.

“Like what?” I asked, coming closer to the shelf. There was a copy of Shakespeare's Hamlet, a few college text books, and several novels by various authors. Besides those, there was practically nothing in this library. I caught eye of a little bay window on the front wall and ran over to it. The window faced the front lawn and I could see all the way to the neighbor’s yard.

“Who’s that?” I asked eagerly, pointing towards one of the neighbors. He had a short blondish brown crew-cut and he wore a yellow T-shirt with faded jeans.

“Buddy Wood,” Wilson said from where he stood in the doorway.

“What school does he go to? I’ve never seen him at Greenwich High.”

“He and his older sister are, no, were home schooled. Louise’s in college now.”

“He’s really cute,” I said with a grin as I pressed my face up against the window.

“Stevie, would -”

“Hey!” I exclaimed, turning around. “That’s just rude. Just because I say a guy’s cute doesn’t mean I want to marry him!”

Wilson raised an eyebrow. “I was just asking if you could maybe step back from the window a little bit…”

I blushed again, I realized I misunderstood completely. “Oops, I’m sorry.” I moved away from the window and sat down on the bench properly. I bet I’d blushed at least five times during this visit - I was probably acting like a complete idiot. “So, do you and Suzy live in this big house all by yourselves?” I asked, changing the subject.

“Suzy’s only staying here while my par- my Dad is on vacation for the week,” Wilson corrected himself. “It’s usually just me here.”

“Doesn’t it get lonely?”

“I’m used to being lonely,” he said simply.

“At least your Dad lives nearby to you so you can always hang out with him!” I said cheerfully.

Wilson just shrugged. “He moved here last year so he could be closer to me, but the whole reason I came here was so I could get away.”

We just stood there, Wilson in the doorway, and me by the window, saying nothing. I decided to take a chance and bring up Andrew’s illness. Maybe I’d be able to get some answers. “Can I ask you a question?” I said quietly.

”Okay.”

“Do you know what the cause of Andrew’s illness is? Like, how on earth did he get it?”

“You were listening in, weren’t you,” Wilson sighed.

“Well yeah, I wanted to know what’s wrong with my brother.”

“I don’t blame you. I would have done the same thing when I was a child,” he said. “The illness has been passed down from several generations, from a mother to her children, and they pass it along to their children and so on. As far as I know, it doesn’t get passed down from the fathers, but I’m not certain. The interesting thing is that most of the people who have the illness today are related. Nevertheless, it’s a very rare condition and not many people have it.”

“If it’s passed through the mother, does that mean that… Mom and I have it, too?” I asked, starting to feel panicky.

“The strange thing is, it seems to be dormant in some people. I don’t understand how exactly it works.”

“You mean, you don’t actually know?” I said quizzically.

“I can’t be certain,” Wilson said. “It’s a very rare and unusual illness. Not many doctors know about it.”

“Then why do you know so much about it?”

Wilson didn’t reply immediately. “I knew someone,” he said. “She died of this illness.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. I was beginning to feel worried again. Poor Andrew, having to go through this.

I spent the next few hours exploring the house with Suzy while Wilson went into his office. We had just finished having an interesting conversation, when I heard a loud thunder clasp from outside. Soon enough, rain started pouring as the previously sunny sky turned dark and gloomy.

“Darn it,” I said to myself as I looked out the window. “I’m not going to be able to bicycle home in this rain…” I could’ve, of course, just gone to Michael’s house like I said I would, but I didn’t feel like going there even if I was just a few blocks away.

“You can probably stay here until the rain stops,” Suzy said.

“My mom’s going to be worried sick about me, though,” I said.

“Why?” Suzy’s eyes were wide with curiosity.

“Well I didn’t exactly tell her that I was heading out... “ I said sheepishly.

Suzy grinned. “I’ve always wanted to see what’d happen if I left the house without Mummy’s permission.” For a five year old, she definitely had a lot of spite.

“Ya shouldn’t do it,” I said. “It’s not fun to get your parents angry.” There was another thunder clasp. “I should really get home…”

“Ask Wilson to drive you,” Suzy said. “His office is right over there.” She pointed down the hall. “Then I can come along and see your house!”

I walked across the hallway until I reached a door with a picture of Gandalf from Lord of the Rings with the caption “Wilson’s office - You shall not pass” taped to it. Maybe he did have a sense of humor after all…

I knocked on the door and heard a quiet “Come in,” from inside. I turned the doorknob and stepped in. I looked around the small office and caught sight of a small framed up picture by the window. “Is this your girlfriend?” I asked as I stepped closer to get a better look.

Wilson looked up from some paperwork on his desk and saw what I was looking at. “No, that’s my mum,” he said. “She passed away when I was ten.”

“Oh,” I said. “She was very pretty. She reminds me of one of my aunts. Same hair color… Maybe they’re distantly related or something, after all, Mom’s British and you’re British. Where’re you from? Brighton... Mom was born there and I’m positive Grandma’s from there… No, wait, she’s from Blackpool. I don’t know my geography.” I laughed, but stopped when I saw that his expression was unfazed. “Anyway, I wanted to ask, do you think you could drive me home? I don’t think I can bicycle home in this weather…”

“I don’t think I have a place on my car to keep your bike,” he said, setting his paperwork aside.

“That’s okay, I can always just leave it here for now and pick it up after school next week,” I said cheerfully. “If it’s okay with you, of course.”

“Alright,” he said, standing up from his chair. He grabbed his hat from the desk and coat on the hanger and made his way out of the room.

We were out the door and on our way back to my house once Suzy had found her raincoat and boots. The drive was pretty short and by the time we got to my house, the heavy rain had reduced to a light drizzle.

“Thanks,” I said as I reached for the door latch. “One more thing, do you think I could have your cell phone number or any number so I can call you when I go to pick up my bike? ‘Cuz you know, I don’t want to intrude at all.”

Wilson took out a piece of paper from his pocket and wrote down his number with a pen he had in his coat pocket.

“Thanks,” I said.

“Can I come in with you?” Suzy asked from the back seat. “I can stay here for a while and Stevie can bring me back when she goes to get her bike!”

Wilson turned to face her. “Sorry Suzy, but we’d better head back.”

"But Wilson!" the she whined. Wilson gestured for me to hurry out, so I did. I gave a small wave as they drove off.

I opened the front door and announced my arrival, but I was greeted to the sound of silence. "Hello?" I said again. "Guys, I'm home!"

"Stevie?" came Mom’s voice as she made her way over to the front door. “Where on earth did you go?!” Andrew and Dad trailed after her.

“Andrew told you I was going out, didn’t he?” I asked casually.

“Even he didn’t know where you went!” Mom said sternly. “For heaven’s sake, where were you?!”

“You could’ve called me on the phone. I have a phone, you know!”

“We did, but you didn’t pick up,” Dad said sternly.

“You had me worried sick,” Mom said, pulling me into a hug. “I almost called the police!”

I let out a sigh. “I only went to Michael’s house,” I lied, though technically I did go to Michael’s neighborhood just not to his house I had a feeling that if Mom and Dad knew that I went to Wilson’s place, they’d be a little suspiciousas to why I went there.

“I thought you said you were cutting all ties with him,” Dad said suspiciously.

“He called me this morning, to apologize. But he wanted to say it face to face. I guess so I’d know his intentions were sincere.” And this time I spoke the truth. Mom didn’t look like she believed me, though.

“You should’ve checked with us first,” Dad said.

“Well I couldn’t because you and Mom have been too busy -” I stopped in mid-sentence because I didn’t want to let on that I knew about Andrew’s illness.

Mom and Dad exchanged glances. Then Mom spoke up. “Stevie, Andrew, we need to tell you something.”

Chapter Six

Andrew and I followed Mom and Dad to the living room where they sat down on the couch, worried expressions pasted on their faces.

“What we’re about to tell you is going to cause a big change in this family,” Dad began. “And you have the right to be scared. We don’t blame you.”

Andrew braced himself. I didn’t want to hear this again, either. I knew exactly what they were about to tell us, and I wondered whether I should tell them that we know already so we don’t have to hear this all again…

Mom’s eyes started to well up with tears as she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. It was painful to watch. Andrew glanced at me before speaking up. “Mom, we know.”

They looked confused. “How?” Dad asked, surprised.

“We listened in from the stairs,” I said, sighing. “Maybe we shouldn’t have, but what can I say? I wanted to know what’s wrong with my brother.”

“...Are you mad at us?” Andrew asked quietly.

“Of course not,” Dad said, warmly.

“So you know what’s going to happen,” Mom said, calming down a little. Andrew nodded and she pulled him into a hug while Dad placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. And I just sat there watching. It was like I was being completely ignored, as if I were invisible. Maybe they weren’t angry at Andrew for listening in, but they were angry at me..? No, that wouldn’t make sense.

They didn’t even seem to notice that I’d left the room to go grab a snack from the kitchen. I bet if I’d left the house, they wouldn’t even notice or care either, but I decided not to try anything. At least they weren’t angry that I went out even though I was supposed to be “suspended”.

The rest of the day was as boring as ever with Mom and Dad talking to Andrew about the various phone calls they had with doctors and what they’re going to do about the illness. They also told us not to mention the illness to anyone outside the family. I didn’t know what to do or what to say, but I had a feeling they’d see me as selfish if I said how I felt, so I just kept quiet.

The next morning, I got up at 5:30 even though I didn’t have any homework to catch up on since it was the weekend. I stayed in bed for another hour and a half or so before I heard Mom calling me downstairs. I wondered why she’d be calling me because first off, today’s Sunday, and secondly, I’m supposed to be suspended.

I made my way down the stairs and found Mom in the living room flipping through a magazine and drinking some lemonade. “Yeah?” I grumbled.

“Mr. Marshal just called to check in on you,” Mom began. “He said he’s lifting your suspension and hopes to see you in school tomorrow, and Michael’s suspension is being pushed back by one day as well.”

“Why’s that?” I asked curiously.

“We told him about the illness and he understands everything that you were going through,” Mom said. “Hitting Michael was still very wrong and you could’ve settled the argument without getting physical, but we understand.”

“He was beating up Andrew, what was I supposed to do!?!” I argued. “Go up to him and say, ‘Hey, Michael, do you think you could get off my brother? It’s totally okay if you don’t.’ That wouldn’t make sense, would it!?!”

Mom shook her head. “Alright, Stevie. You acted on instinct and what you did was right.” Finally, she understood me. I let out a sigh of relief.

* * * * *

Andrew and I hurried out of the bus and made our way back to our classrooms. To everyone else, it was just an ordinary school day, but it felt a lot different to me. I had to admit, even though I usually can’t stand going to school every single morning besides the weekend, it felt good to be back at school even though I’d only been away for the weekend just like everyone else.

I was glad that Michael wasn’t going to be back until tomorrow. I didn’t want him to confront me about why I hadn’t come to his house when I said I would. Let’s face it, Wilson’s house is a lot more fun that Michael’s.

The day was as boring as heck, and I was positive that I was getting a lot of awkward stares from fellow students. They were probably scared of me because I punched Michael, and Michael’s one of the “cool” guys in school.

Not only were kids staring at me, but they were avoiding me like the plague! “I bet you’d do the same if he was beating up your younger sibling who’s dying!” I wanted to say, but I didn’t want to end up in the principal’s office again, and Mom and Dad told us specifically not to tell anyone about Andrew's condition.

On my way to class, I saw Michael’s younger sister, Heather, walking to her classroom. I hurried over to her and started walking alongside her. “Hey,” I said cheerfully.

She gave me a small smile but didn’t say anything. “How’ve you been?” I asked.

She shrugged. “Okay, I guess.”

“That’s good.” My classroom was coming up on the left and I was about to leave when she spoke up again.

“Thank you,” Heather said, “for sticking up for me.”

“You heard?”

“Everyone in school’s been talking about it,” she replied.

“You’re very welcome,” I smiled, and we parted ways.

* * * * *

As the bus pulled away from the curb, I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and dialed in Dr. Trepper’s number to let him know that I’d be stopping by to grab my bike. Somehow I’d explain to Andrew that I had to get off at a different stop and that he should just continue on home. I got his voicemail, so I left a brief message.

“Who’re you calling?” Andrew asked curiously from beside me.

“Just… a friend,” I replied.

Andrew seemed content with my answer and didn’t say anything more.

The bus arrived at the Old Greenwich stop and I was about to follow some of the students to the exit when Andrew caught my hand. “Stevie, wrong stop,” he said.

I sighed. “Andrew, I’m going somewhere else. You should continue on home.”

“Where? Do you have Mom and Dad’s permission?” he pressed. “You’ve been acting very secretive lately.”

I pulled my hand out from his and hurried off the bus. I watched as the bus started to drive off when it suddenly pulled to a stop. I watched as the doors opened again and Andrew made his way out.

“Where are you going?” he asked. “Are you… going to Michael’s again?”

“I lied when I said I went to Michael’s,” I revealed to him.

“Then where’re you going now?”

“You know Dr. Trepper,” I began. “He lives near here. I was on my way to Michael’s place, but I ran into him and boy has he got a gorgeous house.”

Andrew raised his eyebrow. “What?”

“He lives in one of those big victorian houses with his sister. I left my bike there because of the rain, and now I’m going to pick it up. That’s why I said you should continue on home, you know.”

“Oh.”

“Well, there’s no turning back now,” I said, sighing. “Come on.”

We trudged up the street together until we reached Wilson’s place. From the corner of my eye, I was almost certain I saw Andrew hugging himself as if he were cold, but I couldn’t be sure. As I rang the doorbell, I glanced back around to see what Andrew’s reaction was to the house, but he didn’t seem to care about the size of the house like I did.

The front door opened and we weren’t expecting to see the person standing behind the door: Anna Smith!

The blonde babysitter let out a small laugh. “Hey guys. What’re you doing here?”

I almost wanted to ask the same thing, but I didn’t want to sound rude. “I’m coming to pick up my bike.”

Anna looked a little confused for a second. “Oh yeah, right. Wilson told me you’d probably be stopping by to pick it up. Would you guys like to come in and have a drink or something?”

“I’m a little thirsty,” Andrew said, and she let us in.

She led us to the kitchen and I could tell that she was quite familiar with the place. Maybe Suzy was right; maybe Anna and Wilson were dating…. “Do you live here, too?” I quipped.

“Me? Oh no,” Anna said as she handed a cold glass of water to Andrew. “I’m just babysitting… No, housesitting. Actually, more like dogsitting. I’m supposed to be watching over Suzy while Wilson’s at work, but she’s at a friend’s house for a few hours. Chamomile is the only one here, so....”

“Who’s Suzy?” Andrew said quietly, nudging me to get my attention.

“How long have you known each other?” I asked, not really paying attention to him.

“Four years,” Anna said. “We’re just friends, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

“Suzy seems to think you’re in a relationship,” I said with a smirk.

“Hello? Who’s Suzy?” Andrew repeated.

“Wilson’s younger sister,” Anna answered. “She’s a cute little thing, but she doesn’t like me for some silly reason. Maybe I’m not a good babysitter.” She laughed again. “Yeah, I’ve heard what she has to say about us being ‘together’ and all, but it’s all fake. Suzy likes to make things up. A couple of weeks ago, Wilson mentioned to me that Suzy was saying that he was in love with Mrs. Crowell, the lady who lives across the street, and mind you, she’s an old woman.” She laughed. “Wilson’s an awkward guy, so even if we were in a relationship, it probably wouldn’t work out, you know?”

“What do you mean by awkward?” Andrew asked.

“He has trouble getting over things,” she said with a shrug. “Like, he can’t get over the fact that his father got married to another woman. Then again, Michelle’s only 5 years older than Wilson…”

“Now that’s just creepy,” I said.

“Mr. and Mrs. Trepper are actually very nice people, don’t get me wrong,” Anna said. “Even though Wilson says his dad was never there for him growing up, I think he’s quite fond of his father.”

“You seem to know a lot about him.”

“Me? Nooooo, not at all,” Anna said, waving her hands in front of her. “In the four years we’ve known each other, I’ve only learned his birthday, that his accent is supposedly unlike any other British guys’ accent, that he doesn’t like birthday presents, that he was picked on a lot in school, and that he’s a really good listener. He lets me vent to him when I need, and he’s good with advice. Anyway, there’s probably a lot more, but… Like I said, I don’t know much. Wilson knows to keep things to himself.”

“Have you ever asked him for more information? If you’re as good friends as you say you are, you should definitely know more about him,” Andrew suggested.

“When does he come home?” I said. Getting to know Wilson a bit more sounded like a good idea to me. I didn’t know why, but there was something about him that was intriguing me. Maybe because I wanted to know how he was able to help my brother...

“Not until 7 PM,” Anna said, shaking her head. “I don’t think you guys are planning to stay that long.”

“Speaking of that, we should go home already,” Andrew said quietly. “I don’t want to worry Mom and Dad again.”

“Stop worrying Andrew,” I said, giving him a light slap on the back. “No one’s going to care if we stay here for a few more hours.”

Anna stared at us, open mouthed. “Woah, hold on a minute. You plan on staying here for at least two more hours? You’re going to be bored to death. There is literally nothing interesting in this house.”

“Yes there is,” I said, raising my eyebrows. “Have you ever wanted to, maybe… explore a bit? Is there any place in this house that, perhaps, Wilson doesn’t let you see?”

Anna shrugged. “The only place I can think of is his office. But, he really wouldn’t want us poking around in there. I mean, that’s the whole reason why I put the Gandalf sign there… I don’t think he even notices it, though...”

I crossed my arms. “That’s the whole idea.”

Anna scratched the back of her head. “Oh, I don’t know about this. I know, he isn’t here, but he’ll be so mad if he ever finds out…”

“He’s not going to find out.”

Andrew tapped me on the shoulder, “You shouldn’t.”

Anna nodded her head in agreement. “Yeah, I really don’t think you should go up there, even though I totally agree with you that it’d be fun to… snoop around, but Andrew’s right.”

I grumbled to myself, but didn’t protest.

Since there was no changing my mind about staying here until seven, Andrew decided to take this time to get some homework done. He plopped down on the living room couch, making sure not to get the furniture dirty at all with his muddy sneakers.

I asked Anna if I could explore a bit and she said it was totally alright with her, as long as I didn’t go into Wilson’s office. Eagerly, I ran up the stairs to the top floor. Feeling a little adventurous, I decided to take a quick peek into all the rooms. I stepped in front of the first door to my left and pushed the door open.

I peered into what seemed to be a guest room and decided to poke around a bit. The room was pretty small, with just a bed, a set of dressers, and a closet. I noticed a brown trench coat hanging on the doorknob to the closet and I realized this wasn’t a guest room, but Wilson’s own room. Figuring he wouldn’t want me in here, I backed out of the room.

There was something about the library that I felt a connection too. Even though there was next to nothing in there, the empty shelves gave it a nice feel. Making my way over to the few books in the shelves, I pulled out one of the college textbooks and starting skimming through it. Dust flew out as I flipped through the pages; the book obviously hadn’t been touched in a very long time.

I couldn’t understand anything in the book, so I shoved it back into the shelf. Because I like bay windows and it gave a nice view of the front lawn, I decided to sit by the window again. Since Wilson wasn’t there to stop me, I pressed my face up against the window and looked out into the neighbor's lawn. I saw that Buddy boy again, this time he was mowing the lawn.

“What’re you up to?” I glanced behind me to see Anna standing in the doorway.

“Nothing,” I said.

“See anything interesting out there?” Anna asked, coming closer.

“Sort of.”

Anna came over to my side and caught sight of what I was looking at. “Ah, I see. Nice guy, Buddy. He’s quite talented and loves tinkering with things.”

“Cool,” I said.

“Would you like me to introduce the two of you?”

“Me?” I gulped, facing her. “No, no way. No thank you, but thanks.”

Anna laughed. “Someone’s in lo-ove.”

“No, no I’m not,” I said, returning my gaze to the window. Buddy had disappeared, the lawn mower parked in the driveway. A few seconds later, the doorbell rang.

Anna gave me a smirk before going down to answer it. I listened by the top of the stairs as she opened the door. “Oh, hey Bud!” she said.

“Hi, I think I left my wrench here yesterday when I came to fix the sink,” Buddy said. Ooh, nice voice! I said to myself.

“I wouldn’t know, but feel free to look,” Anna said, stepping aside and letting him in. It was only a few minutes before he came back holding a wrench in his hands.

“Found it. Wilson left it on the coffee table for me. Thanks!” With that, he gave a small wave and left. As Anna closed the door, she gestured for me to come down. I did, but slowly.

“Why didn’t you come down?” she said.

I tried to think up a good reason, but the only reason I could think of was that I was embarrassed. I rubbed my hand through my hair - I do that a lot when I get embarrassed - and then I came up with the perfect excuse.

“Just look at my hair!” I said. “I’ve got a mop literally growing out of my head!”

“Now that can be fixed,” Anna said.

“How?”

“I’ve got a flat iron, just not with me now. Tell you what though, you can drop by tomorrow after school and I’ll do your hair for you.”

“If you do that, I will seriously love you forever!” I said excitedly.

The clock struck 6:00 and Andrew and I were still at Wilson’s place, anxiously waiting for him to come home… at least, I was anxiously waiting. Judging by the expression on his face, Andrew seemed pretty bored. Anna was reading a magazine on the couch while I spun around in circles on the desk chair that was in the living room. The sun was still quite bright in the sky even though it was pretty late.

Anna’s cell phone started buzzing from where she had placed it on the couch armrest and she quickly answered it, holding it up to her ear. “Hello? … Oh, hi!”

She hung up a few minutes later after a few “Uh huhs” and “Okays”. After setting her phone down, she spoke to Andrew and I. “Wilson just called,” she said. “He’s going to be working ‘till nine tonight, so…” She shrugged. “Oh well. He’s arranged for Suzy to stay at her friends for a bit longer, so I don’t really need to housesit anymore, though Chamomile might get a bit lonely.”

“So what do we do?” I said.

“Go home?” Andrew quipped.

“I can drive you guys home,” Anna said. “I should be able to find room for your bike in my van.”

“Thanks,” I said. I had to bite my tongue to keep myself from asking why she drove a van.

Anna turned off a few lights, making sure to leave a couple on for Chamomile, then she led us out the front door. I helped her carry my bike into the back of her van before climbing into the front right seat of the vehicle. Andrew seated himself in the captain's chair just behind the driver’s seat, and we were off.

Anna seemed to be in a very talkative mood during the drive. Even more so than before. “You know,” she was saying, “I think Wilson is addicted to work. Like, he seriously cannot survive without work. I don’t mean physical work, but whatever he does at the hospital - visiting patients, filling out paperwork, that sorta thing. You know what I mean, right? He never stops working. Monday through Friday, he works every day from like 5 in the morning to 5 in the evening, sometimes he doesn’t come home ‘till seven, and on Friday he works all night long, some sort of religious accommodation for Dr. Stein, he says. And then on the weekend, he’s too zonked out to do anything! Anywho, I bet the whole reason he’s staying late tonight is because he wants to stay and work late. ” She shook her head as she drove. “I wonder if he ever does anything beside work, though. During this entire week that I’ve been watching over Suzy, I’ve seen him come home from work every single day and do you know what he does? He goes straight upstairs to his office! And you know what he does in there? Work! Seriously, what is with this man? What I would do to get that man to settle down. Read a book maybe, or watch some TV. I know, how about spend some quality time with his sister. That would be soooo nice!”

She continued her diatribe throughout the entirety of the drive which caused her to nearly drive past our house when we got there. “Anna,” I said, “our house is that way.” I gestured behind me with my thumb.

“Oh, oops,” she said. She found a spot where she could make a u-turn and headed back towards our house. As soon as the car was parked, Andrew quickly hopped out, not even bothering to help me unload my bike. I thanked Anna before she drove off and I parked my bike beside the fence. When I got inside, Mom and Dad were lecturing Andrew about staying out so late.

“What were you thinking, staying out so late?!” Mom exclaimed.

“Where were you, anyway?” Dad said. “We tried calling you, but you didn’t pick up.”

Andrew opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off. For some reason, I didn’t want to tell Mom and Dad where we were. “We were at Shannon’s house,” I lied, “helping her with homework.”

“You should always tell us when you’re going to your friend’s house,” Mom chided.

“Yes Mom,” I said.

“You promise?”

“Yeah.”

“Good,” Dad said. “Dinner’s on the table waiting for you.”

As Andrew and I made our way to the kitchen, Andrew said in a low whisper, “I told you so,” but I ignored him. I didn’t know why, but I was feeling proud. I’d never kept a secret from my parents before, and it felt really good.

----

*Crydliserine is made-up name that my friend came up with as a placeholder until I come up with something better. I know nothing about medical stuff, so yeah. :/

So that was the raw, unedited next three chapters of my story. If anyone as any input/suggestions/etc, they'd be greatly appreciated, and if this story interested you at all and you want to read more, feel free to let me know! :D


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Sat Sep 24, 2016 12:35 am
Kale wrote a review...



This review has been brought to you by RevMo.

Now, I haven't read the previous parts, so if I bring up something that was already addressed earlier in the story, feel free to disregard me.

The first thing I'm wondering about is why you chose to group the chapters together. If these had been shorter chapters, I could see grouping them together being a non-issue, but each chapter is fairly substantial, which makes reading and reviewing them a bit daunting.

I'd consider either posting the chapters separately if they're close to or longer than the 2k word mark, or else perhaps utilizing the Novel Workshop forum to post up larger chunks of story. You could also make a project thread over in Writers Corner to help drum up interest in your story as well as post fun facts and snippets that don't make it into the main story.

With that said, I really appreciated your paragraphing, and it made the dialogue and action really easy to follow. The one exception was that huge chunk of diatribe in Chapter 6, but considering it's a diatribe, it made sense and fit. I would still recommend breaking it up into smaller paragraphs to make it more manageable (at least for on-screen reading). Breaking "She shook her head as she drove." into its own paragraph would probably be the best way to go.

That aside, the only real issue with these chapters was the dialogue itself. Almost all of the characters sound the same, and I have no idea how old Andrew is, except for the fact that he's younger than Stevie. If Suzy and Heather's ages hadn't been stated in the narration, I also wouldn't have known how young they were because their dialogue sounds like the adults'.

Dialogue is pretty tricky to nail down, but I think the biggest issue with the children's dialogue is the vocabulary and complexity of the sentences. Generally, younger children talk more simply and with shorter sentences than older children, with adults using the most complex sentences and vocabulary, and I think giving this a look-over with that trend in mind will help you spot instances of where a child character sounds a lot older (or an adult a lot younger) than you would expect them to.

Overall though, your pacing was pretty spot-on, and aside from a little time-hopping at the start of Chapter 4, it was very logical and flowed nicely, so if you can just nail down that dialogue to be more age-appropriate for the characters, that would make these chapters a lot more solid.




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Wed Sep 07, 2016 5:20 pm
Sheadun wrote a review...



Hi FluffyDuckling!
Really excited to read this and continue on with Stevie's life! I'm sure it will be just as amazing as the last chapters :)

Now a couple of my usual suggestions! "Dr. Trepper called two days ago saying that he’d be able to come for dinner and Mom and Dad scheduled a date, and that day had finally arrived"
This is a bit of a run-on sentence. You could rephrase it this way "Dr. Trapper called two days ago, letting us know that he was willing to come to dinner. Mom and Dad had scheduled a day with him, and that long awaited day had finally arrived,"
Minor mistake :)

“But for them, it’s the right side,” Dad said with a laugh( comma instead of a period*), "Right Wilson?"

I also noticed that with Andrew's illness in the beginning was not really described at all. His parents would want to know more about this illness, they wouldn't just let him say that they didn't know much about t. Afterall, they did diagnose it.

One more quick thing, in one instance, you use quipped. Quipped is either used to say someone was being either witty, or joking around. Andrew was only asking a question!

Really good story and plot! Want to continue this :) nice writing!

Keep up the good work :)

Shea



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Thank you so much for your review! It means so much to me, and I'm so glad you're enjoying it so far! :)



Sheadun says...


Oh and if you liked my last chapter, I wrote another and put it up :) I know this is probably annoying but I was wondering if you wanted me to update you when I came out with my chapters :) I totally understand if you don't!!!!


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Yay! :D Sure, that'd actually be fantastic!



Sheadun says...


Thank you!




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