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Young Writers Society



Not Just A Box Ch5

by vox nihili


“Queen Victoria? Of what, England?” Dean snorted.

“The one and only.”

“You’re joking!” Sam laughed.

“Not at all.”

“But that means—“ Sam began.

“He’s freaking ancient. Are you immortal, Spaceman?”

“No. Didn’t I tell you? I travel through time.”

“Uh, no, sure as hell didn’t.” Dean said.

“So how old are you?” Sam queried.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” He grinned at his secret.

“Look, you said it yourself, I’ve died several times. Normal isn’t in our vocabulary. So, try me.”

He sighed reluctantly. “Nine hundred—“

“No, you’re shitting me,” Dean exclaimed.

“Whatever you prefer to think.”

They were interrupted by the arrival of the food.

Dean made a face as the waitress held up the first plate. “Fish sticks and…custard for…?”

The Doctor took it eagerly.

Dean got his burgers next, and Sam his salad, after which the group settled into a lull as they ate.

A minute or so into their meal, Sam’s phone vibrated with another message.

He’s the weirdest bastard we’ve met yet. And that says something.

Sam suppressed a laugh.

Yeah. He’s different. Nice to meet someone not trying to kill us, huh?

He only grunted in response.

“You said you’d met angels,” Sam broke the silence as they ate. “What are they like in your universe?”

“Stone sociopathic killers.” He swallowed hard, his expression growing sad.

“So, what, no smiting, or destroying hosts, no blood sigils in Enochian?” Dean asked.

“No, none of the sort,” The Doctor replied quietly.

“So what do they do then? Still have wings? Do they fly?”

“No. No, they don’t fly. They’re so fast, they essentially teleport.”

“Huh, sounds pretty tame to me,” Dean rejoined. “At least they don’t come at you waving their shiny swords, insisting you help them end the world.”

“No. They come quietly, and when you see them, it’s too late.” His voice dropped to a mumble at the end of the sentence.

“But you’ve seen them, and survived,” Sam prompted, curiosity rising.

“Few do.” He stared out the window as he replied.

“Well then, good for you, ET.” Dean joked.

The Doctor’s gaze snapped back onto the room.

He looked Dean in the face, cold, as he said, an unnerving edge of bitterness in his voice, “Yes, yes, good for me, good for me, living while my friends die.”

Dean’s expression fell. “I, uh, that’s terrible.”

“We didn’t know,” Sam offered, guilt prickling inside him.

“No, You wouldn’t know.”

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2631 Reviews

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Sun Oct 26, 2014 8:37 pm
Rydia wrote a review...



Doctor Who mixed with Supernatural? Sounds like my kind of fun!

First off, this is a bit dialogue heavy, especially in the beginning there. Give us a bit more description, whether it's body language or what the place they're eating at looks like. You've got some nice details like the food they're eating, but some more setting would be great.

A few lines felt off character for me so next I'm just going to highlight those briefly...

“He’s freaking ancient. Are you immortal, Spaceman?” << This feels a bit forced, too much like you're trying to get an in joke into the dialogue.

“Stone sociopathic killers.” He swallowed hard, his expression growing sad. << Sociopathic doesn't feel very on character for the doctor and this line in general is a bit extreme. This is the guy who says things like wibbly wobbly time thingy. He's not normally harsh, except when he's really upset. He's either technical or silly or just generally quite light hearted/ jokey.

“So, what, no smiting, or destroying hosts, no blood sigils in Enochian?” Dean asked. << The 'sigils in Enochian' felt more like a Sam line.

This seems a good bit of fun. I'm intrigued as to which of his friends have died and this darker side of the doctor may work I suppose, in which case the line higher up isn't as off as I thought. Maybe build into it a little more slowly though.

Good luck with this!

Heather xx




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Wed Oct 22, 2014 3:01 am
RedMoon wrote a review...



Ok, NOW, so...

I've read all of this so far, and let me tell you, this was great. I really like this. I've often thought about crosses between my favorite TV shows, and since I know a lot about Doctor Who and Supernatural (although I'm behind the last couple of seasons) I can tell you that you pretty much nailed it. I'm an avid Doctor Who fan, but I can't call myself a Whovian until I watch every single doctor who episode.

Ok, so for the review. This is great. I don't think I saw any glaring mistakes. There was one part where the Doctor said "sociopathic". Would the Doctor say "sociopathic"? I'm asking because I don't know, but if you think it fits, then okay. Also, I think you should let him finish his complete age, because adding a few more digits would be awesome, and I want to see Dean's and Sam's reaction to the added years.

This is also much shorter than I think it should be. I read your other chapters and they were gradually getting shorter as you went along. I hope that you aren't running out of ideas. I hope that you continue with this. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I really hope that you don't quit.

All in all, this was great. Love DW, okay with supernatural, love the cross. :D

Keeping doing what you're doing! :D




vox nihili says...


Thanks. This one was sort of a 'drabble' in fanfic terms. There is a sequel, though, although it's essentially my AU version of season 10 of Supernatural, which involves the Doctor helping Sam find Dean. And what happens after that. (Vague so as to avoid spoilers, in case you haven't watched all the latest!)



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34 Reviews

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Wed Oct 22, 2014 2:54 am
RedMoon says...



Ok so




RedMoon says...


sorry, typo, ignore this.




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