Hello Ms. Olafson (at least, I presume, from your username, olafson11, that you are, indeed, Ms. Olafson herself). Welcome to the Young Writers Society. I hope you enjoy your stay. We're very committed here to helping young writers improve their writing craft!
With that said, as far as informative pieces go, I found this to be a bit sparse on the information, heavy with the lauding. There's issues with excessive modifier usage, as well as a general lack of coherent organization, which results in the jumping of ideas. An example of this is most obvious in the first paragraph, which leaps from introducing the subject of this article to describing the attributes of a particular Miami suburb and suddenly back to describing the commitment to the shop mentioned in the first sentence before continuing on about our subject's accomplishments.
Something else I noticed was a complete lack of objectiveness or modesty in this, and it can be tied to the excessive use of modifiers I mentioned earlier, combined with the fact that you are (presumably) the author of this article. For instance, claiming that you are "an amazing floral designer" without providing concrete examples to back up this claim renders it quite empty. A more effective modifier to use would be "accomplished" or "well-established" as you could then cite the number and variety of events as concrete examples of being both accomplished and well-established.
There were also a number of typos in this, which severely detracted from the professionalism of this article. In the same sentence as the use of "amazing", "design" should be "designs". Small details like subject-verb agreement are important in establishing one's professionalism through writing, and these small details can make or break a professional image.
I strongly encourage you to more thoroughly proofread your own work before posting it publicly, or else invest a copy editor who will ensure that your writing is free of all sorts of grammar errors.
Points: 72525
Reviews: 1220
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