Dominatrix

Heyo sexy!
Me for da review. So…

I know the background behind this project, and since this is the first instalment, it’s only going to get better. ‘Dominatrix.’
‘RAWR!
CRACK!
RAWR!
CRACK!’ – you have got very noisy, onomatopoeic vocabulary at the opening, which creates a great feel for the violently sexual nature of this piece.

‘Dominatrix!
Dominatrix!’ – the persistent use of exclamatives makes this all the more dramatic.
‘Whip me until my bottom bleeds!
Without any caution please proceed!
But how much can I receive?’ – by tagging the rhetorical question on the end here, it gives the piece true voice. And you can tell that this narrator really wants to have seven shades of s*@t beaten out of them. It’s an interesting concept to explore.

‘She's got a long whip
She won't say no to a twist or turn
She's like, "baby kneel down, taste this!"
She's like, "baby kneel down"’ – the repetition of ‘she’ here emphasises who is really in control. The eponymous, yet faceless character of the Dominatrix is intriguing, because you can’t really connect with her. She’s more symbolic and that works out the imagination, giving a personal claim on your definition of sexy to lay down what your own Dominatrix would look like in your head. The speech is also tantalisingly sexual.

‘And I await her
Release of piss’ – interesting cover of fetishism here. Me likey mucho. Again it adds to the characterisation and also the sexual intensity of the piece.

‘She kicks and spits on me!
Wouldn't be surprised if she shits on me!
Must subscribe to her needs’ – I think the end line of this verse is paradoxical, because the Dominatrix is supposed to be fulfilling the needs of the submissive. So, for him to think that he is serving her is something of a contradiction. The idea that she might defecate on him is not only quite ‘shocking’ I guess, but the fact he realises he can’t do anything to stop it (or rather, won’t) is a further examination of the human psyche. Interesting.

‘She's like!
She's like, "Imma let you taste!
Babe kneel down!
Babe taste it!
Babe kneel down!
Babe taste it all!
Babe love it!
Babe kneel down and taste it!
Love it!"
Leather attire
"Let you taste"
CRACK!
Leather attire
CRACK!
"Babe kneel down"
CRACK!
RAWR!
CRACK!’ – Ok, so the ending chunk just EXPLODES. XD And it’s perfect. The rhythm builds and it gets really frantic and intense and just boom boom boom. LOL

You can tell what happens to the character, but it kind of gives it a Hollywood ending which is deliciously mysterious. I like the reference to leather (is wearing a leather-look dress at the time of writing this, blush) and just basically, like I said in person: This is one of, if not the best piece you’ve written.

Outstanding characterisation, brilliant concept, well written, deliciously combined into a fantastic, dark and brooding work.
SOOOOOOOOO PROUD
-huggles-
Love you.

♥

Knight Dragon, here to review!

Technical:

"Without any caution please proceed!
But how much can I receive?"

"She won't say no to a twist or turn
She's like, "baby kneel down, taste this!"
She's like, "baby kneel down"
And I await her
Release of piss"

"Wouldn't be surprised if she shits on me!"

Jeez! Is this supposed to be some sort of song about BDSM? Erotic pain if you ask me. While I found this readable, I feel like that you could describe what the music is supposed to sound like. All I'm getting is a cross between the sexual nature of a Theory of a Deadman song and the sadism of a Cannibal Corpse song. Two very different bands, I'm aware but that is what I got out of it. Does this girl want to bring about pain or pleasure? Or pleasurable pain? This is a cross between sadism and erotica and it is crazy!