z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone Language

Technology, Life and Humanity

by glecile


Technology, Life and Humanity

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.” This was a quote from the very famous genius, Albert Einstein that described the real situation of the world with technology. Lots of inventions and innovations were made due to the continuous application of knowledge which makes the domain of technology to expand. People used to live in the shadow of technology all throughout. In the same way, technology varies depends on how people need or want it. Others may just use them just to show their wealth and some are working with its real purpose. Just like having cellular phones, people wanted to show off their upgraded applications instead of using its real purpose for communication. Also, technology had a great impact to the lives of most people as it gives a collection of techniques, on being an entity and as a process.

Technology has been a big part on our lives in addition to learning and discovery of new things. Tony Bates (1995) once stated in his article that people were attached on technology to improve their knowledge and learning. Likewise, developing one’s education through technology was not preferred by Bates. He claimed that learning with technology loses the capabilities of humans to think in a broader perspective which is the Discovery Channel and Flow Cable used to alter (Jamaica Observer, 2013). "Enabling the delivery of education and enhancing the learning process with our technology is an area of major focus for us.” This was a statement by Nicole Campbell of Flow Cable in which showed their support in the use of technology as the means of learning and education. It promotes technology-aided learning that can help people, especially children to cope with the new trends in technology as well as in their studies. Thus, it indicates that learning with technology is beneficiary as the world goes through it. But as the realm of technology runs bigger and better, people see it as an entity which carried out to be good or bad.

Currently, technology comes into view as entity. It is the act where people refer to technology as a real being. In the same way, humans established in their minds that technology cannot be gone and something that is really hard to loose. Humans cannot definitely live without it. And this is how technology and the machines created through it manipulate people. Magicians were behind every amazing invention based on Standerfer (2012). It is because they keep on finding new ways to improve their products so that people will get attracted and be a regular user of it. The most common example for this was the cellular phones nowadays. It comes with boundless applications that become the customer’s apple of the eye. However, it was used by many to communicate to the social world and spends too much time on it that they can never do anything. And oftentimes, people demand more of the products that will enable manufacturers make an innovation and the process continue.

The world revolves on the wide imagination of people wherein it leads to the continuous process of everything. It explores the needs and wants of the society. By this, producers seek to find what is best for the consumer’s satisfactory until the set-up of a never ending demand and production was formed. We can call this as the process. Time goes by and things are very likely to change. Wants become needs and people barely live without technology by their sides. In line with this, technology becomes something to rely on. Let us say in school, we had lots of paper works to do and reading books will consume too much of our time but with one click, answers instantly appears in front of you. It also gives relaxation whenever stress comes. Technology is such a big solution to some but could it also be a problem? We never know where all of this will lead to.

Our world, our lives and our everyday living was greatly transformed by technology as it gives man a collection of techniques, on being an entity and as a process. Lots of activities became easier to achieve, never been time-consuming, and many others that could be thankful of. But still, not all individual see it as a positive one. Some were not assured if technology works better through a wide range of techniques, with the learning that it can give, the satisfactory and a lot. All things that have done had their own positive and negative features. We must learn how to make use of it equally so that its real purpose stands out. Technology is said to be the highway of ideas which we can find every single thing that is possible on earth. Lastly, technology was to explore, innovate and transformation which now can be seen everywhere, must be used fairly and enough to be understood.

References:

Bates, T. (1995). Technology, Open Learning and Distance Education. Retrieved from T and F online Web site: http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/0268051960110313?journalCode=copl20#.UjE7dcaxZqU

Negroponte, N. (n.d.). Nicholas Negroponte on New Technological Solutions. Retrieved from cisl.ucar: http://www.cisl.ucar.edu/zine/96/spring/articles/6.negroponte.html

Observer, T. J. (2013). Flow, Discovery Channel team up to boost technology-aided learning. Retrieved from Jamaica Observer Web site: http://www.jamaicaobserver.com/news/Flow--Discovery-Channel-team-up-to-boost-technology-aided-learning_14936521#ixzz2e1BRQeSo

Regan, T. (2007, August 29). The Technology Kids want, Versus what they need. Retrieved from Csmonitor Web site: http://www.csmonitor.com/2007/0829/p17s01-stct.html

Standerfer, J. (2012, March 13). Manipulate Machines, Not People. Retrieved from John Standerfer Web site: http://www.johnstanderfer.com/2012/03/13/manipulate-machines-not-people/

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Thu Oct 03, 2013 5:00 pm
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whitewolfpuppy wrote a review...



Hey there! I'm Onyx and I will be reviewing your article today! :)

Comments
Great job with this article! I am very proud of you for your organization and topic sentences. :) Just a few things that I would like to point out in your article. Of course you do not have to do anything with the changes that I am suggesting. I would be perfectly fine with that, you did a great job. These are just a few nit-picky things. You can always send me a message if you do not understand why I said or changed something. :) I am always opened to anything, if I say something wrong. Feel free to tell me, I would gladly appreciate it. :) So, here we go.

Albert Einstein that described

Don't know why but this just seems like it needs a comma between "Einstein" and "that" It might just be me who is reading it wrong or something. Just a thing to look at.

technology varies depends on how people need or want it.

Right here, I believe that "depends" should be "depending" only because it sounds a little weird when I read it out loud to someone. If you know what I am saying, if not. Message me and we can discuss it. :)

Tony Bates (1995) once stated in his article that people were attached on technology to improve their knowledge and learning.

Alright, so quoting someone or using what they had said means that you need to but quotations around those words. " " <-- Those things, ha- xD So, if you are using those words exactly, please do that, that way we know that you are not taking credit for something they had said. Even if you state who it is by, no one will know what you are taking from that person unless they know everything about them. Which would be creepy but yeah know. Just make sure you quote them. :)

"Enabling the delivery of education and enhancing the learning process with our technology is an area of major focus for us.” This was a statement by Nicole Campbell of Flow Cable

Right here you did a great job with quoting someone! :D

Currently, technology comes into view as entity.

Some reason, this sounds funny to me as well. I would put "an" between the words "as" and "entity" For me, that seems grammatically correct, but hey, I could be wrong who knows?

Over all
Great job! I do have a question... Why do you have some sentences underlined? I didn't see why they were underlined. If you don't mind giving me a comment to tell me why. I would like to know your reasoning. :) Again, you did a great job! My comments were just a bit picky, I know that. So, thank you very much for your time and I hope that you keep on writing some more articles! I can't wait to read some of them! Oh, and I am sorry that this review is later than expected. :(
~Onyx




glecile says...


Hello, whitewolfpuppy!!
Thank you for your time, too! Those sentences underlined were the main topic in every paragraph. Honestly, I forgot to remove it because there are still a lot of paper works in front of me. I do apologize for it. :)
Thanks a lot. :)



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Thu Oct 03, 2013 12:40 pm
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Hannah wrote a review...



Hey there!

I have a couple of general comments on this essay that I hope you can use on any essay assignments in the future.

First, I was told by a past teacher of mine to never start or end an essay with a quote. This is because when you create an essay, you're trying to put some of your original thought out into the world. By starting with a quote, you're letting someone else take up the MOST VALUABLE real estate of your whole essay, and you're not introducing your own product. It's like inventing an awesome new thing and then letting someone else tell the world about it for the first time. Weird, right? I think the quote is strong and can definitely bolster your essay (make it stronger), but you should slip it into somewhere in the middle of the paragraph instead.

Next, if you're going to introduce and talk about varying points of view, you generally want to pick one side that your essay supports and disprove the other side. This is applicable to your second paragraph, where you share information about one person who dislikes technology + education and another person who helps to connect the two. Presenting two view points confuses you reader -- they don't know why they are reading your essay!

Lastly, one thing that you can ALWAYS do with academic essays is narrow your topic. You've been given a topic that is too wide; technology can cover books and books and books of information, right? So it's your responsibility as the student to modify the assignment to something that can work in an essay.

You might consider focusing on just one category of technology in relation to your argument. For example, you seem to want your thesis to be about technology as an entity and as a process. You might choose to talk about the entity and process in SPECIFICALLY communication between students as it relates to technology. That narrows the playing field and you can copy more situations specifically. Specific mentions are, generally, easier for readers to understand and follow enthusiastically, especially opposed to wide-reaching vague ideas with no point of reference.

I hope this advice can help you in the future! Good luck with your project, and let me know if you have any questions about YWS. Hope to see you around again soon!




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Thu Oct 03, 2013 10:15 am
nadinefampo wrote a review...



I agree with you that technology surrounds us nowadays, and it influenced everyone of us.Technology aids us to new discoveries . Regarding your essay, you did well in constructing your ideas. Just a little revision on your wordings will do. :)




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Wed Oct 02, 2013 2:47 pm
Ruth Anne G. Malapitan says...



Amazing. Very impressive Essay! :)

[ Edit ]


glecile says...


thank you!!



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Wed Oct 02, 2013 1:16 pm
kingteejay8 says...



I love it. You've made an excellent essay. Job well done. :D




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Wed Oct 02, 2013 12:39 pm
kriselleabby says...



You have a point on your essay. Keep up the good work! :D




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Wed Oct 02, 2013 11:39 am
Euclarkie says...



Very well said. Nice article huh, keep up the good work. :D




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Love wrote a review...



I am surprised no one else noted it... I personally find the essay rather confusing and not too well written :P Much of it seems to be a monologue, often stating the obvious and with no obvious direction. There are a considerable number of awkwardly worded sentences, while some outright defy the rules of English. I am still rather uncertain of the main point of the essay. It seems to be that we should use technology wisely, which I agree with, but it remains rather ambiguous. I imagine that you should be able to improve it greatly with careful scrutiny :P




glecile says...


Thank you for your comment! Hopefully I can have my better essay the next time. :)



Love says...


:)



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Wed Oct 02, 2013 5:37 am
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DreamWork wrote a review...



Hello glecile,DK here with review on your fantastic essay.


Technology, Life and Humanity,-->the title of your essay give some idea of the main points that you will write in your essay.Selection of proper title is certainly important in essay writing.So let's see the points you gives here,to ensure that if you have provide a suitable title for your own essay.

1.Technology.
You give a clear explanations about the technology itself in human life through the quote from a well known genius, Albert Einstein.

“It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.”

It is a brilliant start to express an opinion of the writer herself.But I see that you outline the key point which is in first paragraph in the beginning of your essay is quite less ideal.
Also, technology had a great impact to the lives of most people as it gives a collection of techniques, on being an entity and as a process.

The key points preferably written in one paragraph and then followed by a detailed explanation about it.It helps the reader to easily find out about it.
2.Life and Humanity.
Through your essay, you apparently tend to give points of the importance of technology in life and humanity. Yet you balance those with the opinions or facts provided by the various parties who have expressed the disadvantages of technology to human's life.
Likewise, developing one’s education through technology was not preferred by Bates. He claimed that learning with technology loses the capabilities of humans to think in a broader perspective which is the Discovery Channel and Flow Cable used to alter (Jamaica Observer, 2013

Your essay is indeed interesting and meet the topic given. However, the contents of the impact of technology on humanity remains 'lackluster'. I also worry if you provide too many opinions from others, the originality of your own opinions become a dull essay in terms of creative thinking.
Anyway,this is a good essay to read!I like the issues you want to point up here :) Keep it up!Good job.




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Tue Oct 01, 2013 11:22 pm
shielamendoza says...



Great job. And keep it up :))




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Tue Oct 01, 2013 3:43 pm
marcial says...



You brought clear understanding about the topic. Good job!




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Tue Oct 01, 2013 3:27 pm
AiraPatricia says...



The title of your essay is nice. :) You have explained your point clearly. Job well done! :)




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Tue Oct 01, 2013 2:27 pm
charles23mds says...



Nice one. I like your essay. Keep up the good work.





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