Sweet and Unspoken

6 posts
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AmiiLightwood
Gender Female
Points 1028
Reviews 20
Fri Jun 17, 2011 1:04 pm
AmiiLightwood says... · Fri Jun 17, 2011 1:04 pm
I wake up every night
With your name upon my lips
Sweet and unspoken
Unrequited bliss
Turn around, look at me
Standing in amongst the crowd
Watching and waiting
Silently so proud
The pain you bring my heart
Is equal to the pleasure
Every breath you take -
Sweet beyond measure
Your dancing eyes sparkle
Like the sun's rays beaming down
Warming, uplifting
Sweep away my frown
'You've gotta sing sometimes, like you don't need the money,
Love sometimes, like you'll never get hurt,
You've got to dance, dance, dance, like there's nobody watching,
It's gotta come from the heart if you want it to work.'
Adam Brand, Come From The Heart
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aniwinchester
Gender Female
Points 1040
Reviews 1




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AmiiLightwood
Gender Female
Points 1028
Reviews 20
Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:00 pm
AmiiLightwood says... · Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:00 pm
naww i love you aniwinchester - for liking my totally nonsensical poetry :)
what would i do without you?
'You've gotta sing sometimes, like you don't need the money,
Love sometimes, like you'll never get hurt,
You've got to dance, dance, dance, like there's nobody watching,
It's gotta come from the heart if you want it to work.'
Adam Brand, Come From The Heart
Quote




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Triskiller
Gender None specified
Points 940
Reviews 4
Sat Jun 18, 2011 4:50 pm
Triskiller says... · Sat Jun 18, 2011 4:50 pm
This is really sweet and very well written. I have really nothing else to say but: Keep writing!
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MisunderstoodDreamer
Gender Female
Points 1235
Reviews 17
Sat Jun 18, 2011 8:38 pm
MisunderstoodDreamer says... · Sat Jun 18, 2011 8:38 pm
This is so good! I love the rhyme scheme. Plusyou wrote it so well I can almost feel how it seemed you felt. Great job! Keep writing!
I am a PUZZLE
yet to be put TOGETHER

But at the same time, I'm just one PIECE
still trying to figure out where I FIT IN
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AmeliaCogin
Gender Female
Points 7522
Reviews 229
Sat Jun 18, 2011 9:01 pm
AmeliaCogin says... · Sat Jun 18, 2011 9:01 pm
Hello. I'm Alia and I'll be reviewing for you today. Normally, I hate rhyming poetry. I find that the writers often forsake emotion and passion because they are so caught up trying to make their piece rhyme. However, I am very impressed by your piece. It had a lovely, gentle rhythm, and you thrust wonderful emotion into your poem. I loved it, and haven't any gramatical nitpicks. Well done! Keep up the good work, and *like*!
~ Alia
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6 posts


When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
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